PostPoems Be Artistic. Be Creative. Be Inspired!

Ever gotten that feeling where you wanted to die?

Felt like nothing was left of you,

And you just wanted to say goodbye?

Tired of the sorrows that reign in your heart too?

Thought about the blade in all of its shine

And the regrets that buried in time?

What happens when all you have is hope,

But that leaves you too. How can you cope?

Do you begin again,

Or do you put it to a final end?

What happens when all apologies have left your heart?

How could you ever forget that feeling, so tart?

Resolutions seem too far past

To reconcile the love that was meant to last.

Maybe hope is too much to ask for

Even for the love that we promised to adore. 

This is how the story goes.

A lonely boy, trapped in his self-consciousness, aggravated by others

Meets a girl, a girl trapped in her self-consciousness, their minds connect at once

They go through the good, the bad, the beautiful, the ugly

They go behind authority just to see each other's faces

To keep that horror of self-consciousness away

But one day, that girl goes too far

One day she thinks she can have it all

One day she doesn't tell him about her feelings for him

And that's when the story truly begins   

The boy and girl talk, they work it out, they think it'll all be fine

He starts to notice her changing, changing in ways he thought he'd never see

He thinks its just a phase

He thinks "everyone goes through these phases, she's just going through one"

She doesn't stop.

He starts to adapt to her, starts to forget how she used to be

Starts to forget the girl that he fell for in the beginning of the story

Starts to pay the price

"Every relationship has their ups and downs"

Yes but that relationship wasn't a rollercoaster

It was a free fall, a free fall that doesn't stop when it hits the ground

But somehow goes further and further down into the dark abyss of the unknown world

The boy, that stupid naive boy is blinded, scared that everything will come back

But he doesn't think that he wants everything to come back

He doesn't think that that self-consciousness is worse now then it ever was

When did he hear those words that would light his face up

When did she give him everything he wanted

When did she give him everything he needed

One day reality comes in

The day that has been needing to come, but has been dreaded

That girl does it for the last time

That boy still hiding behind his fears of being alone

It ends

It ends for them but not for him

She goes off to accomplish new things and to create this very story for more people

He doesn't go off, he falls back into darkness of his own demons

Getting pulled further and further back every time a glimpse of hope enters that dull head

Not knowing where he is headed

He tries fighting for his freedom

Tries to run back towards the light

But what he doesn't know is he's running backwards

The light is out of reach from him

Burying himself deeper in the ashes of his life's destruction

He fights, he wants to be a phoenix but instead he's a deer in headlights

Not knowing where he's going

Not knowing where he needs to go

Instead of finding all that out he sits and lets everything take control of his body

But what he needs to be doing is standing up for himself

He needs to crawl out of the darkness to be exposed to the beauty of the world

He pushes the demons away

Pushing them further and further

Pulling him closer and closer

He reaches it

He sees it

He believes it

And the story end

The story ends for that little self-conscious boy

But another story begins for a man that has seen everything

A new beginning

A good beginning.

~~~

the glistening dew upon

the petals of a rose,

and the

mourning sun

<¤>

the caustic yet subtle pungency

of sandalwood twirling past my nares

and 

the forest leaves underfoot

<¤>

a newborn baby's wail

and walls

and walls

of silence

layers

and layers

of denial

and

shame inflicted

love constricted

*

tightly wound 

to cover the 

pain of the past

ironically

making it last

<¤>

now,

here

i

sit

with dimestore favorites in an old shoebox

my kept treasures

after your funeral

and memories that you left

it feels so senseless

bereft

 <¤>

your burning passion

LOVE

LOVE

love of country

that was

that gaping bore,

carved into the very core of your soul...

...from war

<¤>

the depth of compassion in the heart

of a nine year old

waking in the night 

to the sound of

weeping

¤

sneaking down the stairs

peering through the railing

the clenched fists pressed tightly to eyes

desperation overflowing

overwhelming feelings 

of sorrow

of shame

of anger

of helplessness

*

torment

*

 teardrops

that brandished holes

upon my heart

to watch you

hide your turmoil

 in the darkness of the night

...alone

¥

and now

you are gone

.:-'*'-:. 

  you never knew...

I saw!

you never knew

I felt it too!

~~~~

September 11, 2013

1

To cast away the darkest thought,

just turn your sights upon the sky,

embrace it's beauty- love for aught,

which stands against the test of time.

Just keep your head above the clouds,

and bounded not by earth's restraint,

your shame is naught my love -feel proud,

and hold on till another day.

However sad that you may feel,

will pass in time as all things do,

but if they don't lets make a deal,

to keep on giving life a chance.

And in return I'll see to that,

your next tears shall be tears of joy,

so lay back down and let me pat,

your head until your fall asleep.

Bring forth the thoughts which make you smile,

bring forth the strength I see in you,

embrace these thoughts and in a while,

you'll wake up to another day.

---End---

Sorrow filling my lungs

Choking on the tears

Crushing my heart

But I’ve never felt so alive

Underwater Trying Not To Drown

Cinders to ash, ash to smoke

My soul caught on the breeze

And left this empty corpse behind

Far behind and not looking back

Why can’t we go back to who we once were?

I'll write your name upon this paper

next to mine in a heart

with forever as a waver

till death do us part

Mrs. Insert your name here

that's the way it should've been

your name, now a puddle from tears

written with the ink of a washable pen

what happened to the fairy tale

I never did believe

until the day I looked in your blue eyes

and saw what could be

now my dream is just a dream

that will never come true

because a fairy tale won't happen

if there is no you

now I spend my nights alone

wishing I was her

and all day I stare at my phone

hoping to see your number

that new girl, she's the lucky one

I hope she knows what she has

because for you, I'd give the sun

for one more night in your hands. 

..............

Part I of II

This is the story of Larry Joe Prince

And the way Arizona stole his innocence.

It is written with hope that there may come a day

When a wise judge will grant him his moment to say

All the things so conveniently left out of court,

Made American “justice” look more like a sport,

With a high-priced attorney that didn’t think clear,

And the false testimony of one with much fear,

And the state prosecute thought “I’ll surely reach fame”,

He said, “Hell, I don’t care who the state wants to blame,

It’s a paycheck to me; I don’t care about truths,

It’s my ego I feed, I’m a low lying sleuth!!”

So they all drew their “guns” on that guy Mr. Prince,

Absolutely no shred of secure evidence,

They proceeded to send him to death row to sit,

For the murder of one that he did not commit,

And the biggest and worst sin of all that was done,

Was the way that the people held on to their “guns”,

They embraced all the lies to evade what was clear,

As revenge prevailed justice with each little tear,

And for those in the grave who just watch from above,

With no longer a voice to teach them that real love,

Is not proven by putting the blame on a man,

Just because he is there….cause the courts and you can,

See the proof of one’s love speaks out so very clear,

Even after the grave when one’s body’s not here,

You will hear their soul cry, and you’ll then know for sure,

If they’re resting in peace or they’re haunted some more.

There are families that hide from life’s reality,

The dead man in this case begs you hear his soul’s plea,

Make amends for the errors you’ve made in the past,

And put down all those stones, and those already cast,

If this dead man could speak he’d have something to say,

Of the circus that ran through the courtroom that day,

And if not for the dead man then do it for you,

Cause we all have to answer to God what is true,

Larry Prince knows he’s clear and he wins either way,

                              Cause he’s INNOCENT judge, the state’s in disarray.                                

So please read all with care on this day we implore,

Please don’t look at this life as a game where you score,

It’s integrity that is of stake in this court,

And it’s not mine or yours it’s this country’s that’s short

Of a quality no longer active today,

If it dies, it’s the lives of our loved one’s…they’ll pay.

Take your time, read it all, and be true to your heart,

And we’ll all pray it’s not too late for a new start.

Part II of II

They all loved cocaine but they hid it from Dad,

He just couldn’t believe that his kids could be “bad”,

So his eyes he did close, and they stayed tightly shut,

While his best offspring died with that stuff in his gut,

And they said, “It was murder”, and placed the blame there,

Yes, it’s true ‘bout that bullet and blood in his hair,

And the roots of that crime have been hidden so well,

By the real guilty ones with the lies they did tell,

For those self-righteous ones that just stared and stood by,

And condoned this deceit without batting an eye,

For the cowards that watched as the killers went free,

Be aware this could happen to you or to me,

And your sons or your daughters could one day be led

To a place where they wish they would rather be dead,

So now don’t be afraid to let truths in your ears

When your children are hurting with eyes full of tears,

Don’t you cower or shudder, don’t whine and don’t wince,

And remember the story of Larry Joe Prince.

Written in parts, from 2000-2002

Original Copyright 2002 

Registration Number / Date:

                   TXu001112792 / 2002-12-02

..................

07/21/13 ©

*

......................

I apologize for my lack of tact,

And I know this resolve not easy, in it's fact,

You, so cute, in your anger of this,

So innocent and sweet, in your pain, so amiss,

But truth is, whether it was a stick or a baseball bat,

Makes not a difference, from where you sat,

Pain inflicted, is still pain, in-deed,

The best part, is that you recognize this seed,

Oh, my little darling...cry hard, and cry deep,

It is not in vain your tears, they weep,

You've opened doors, and possibilities galore,

You are now free!!! 

Now live some more!

5:25 PM 7/8/2013 ©

.................

My life used to be

one giant hulking mess.

and me a weak sodden soul,

padded with distress.

I tried to fight against it

but it kept dragging me down.

Smothering me in regrets

and causing me to drown.

I often sleep for hours

with no desire to wake.

And let the depression take me down

though I know it is a mistake.

SO I begin to look for vices

to let my frustrations out.

Not thinking that I need anyone

to talk to this about.

So instead I grabbed some liqour

enough to put me to sleep

Or drink a drop of cold medicine.

to knock me off my feet.

And sometimes I'd get this feeling

of immense pain in my head.

And take two advils,

then to the world I was dead.

I'd let my demons drag me down,

and tell me it was okay.

That no one cared and I was worthless

and I'd believe what they'd say.

So I'd drink more of stolen liqour

and do what I knew was wrong.

But the allure of my demons was enticing

for they sung a hypnotic song.

So I kept letting them drag me down

and I never expected to get back up.

Just kept giving them my tears

to fill their never ending cup.

I sometimes chose to fight against them

thinking I don't want to let them in.

And then life takes a downwards turn

and I give in to them again.

And though this may be a time, when

 their power over me, is slowly but surely thinning.

Sometimes I can't help but feel,

my inner demons are winning.