gone

Forever

Folder: 
Heart Break

If absence makes the heart grow fonder, 

Then I'll wait for you just a bit longer...

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Only if they're willing to wait for you too...

Heart Ache

Folder: 
Heart Break

My heart aches everynight I cry myself to sleep, When I have the thought that you aren't mine to keep. 

My heart aches every morning my notifications are baron, and so are my arms. All I can do is keep caring for your attitude and your charms.

Everytime I hear a bird coo, or when I even put on my shoe, all I can think of is how

My Heart Aches For You.

 

 

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Cherish them while they're still there.

What Now?

In an unbroken silence

Stalled in time

Caught in your own net

With your heart struck

And stolen

Keeping the same tune

Just air

And wind

A sobbing breath

Sky blown

Through forgotten reeds

Choking on the truth of it

Play the game 

Chess is of the mind

And you're all heart
What now that it's gone

Chess is of the mind

And you were never

Good at it

 

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tags:

Ascendancy

Folder: 
Hand Written
"To think, 
back when I had asked
the exhausted man looking back,
eyes bloodshot, 
 
cheeks lined with scruff,
sweat on brow,
mr. mirror, who are you? 
Why are you here?
 
To think, 
years ago, barely alive,
that five more since then
I'd be sitting in this chair, 
 
typing away like I once did,
amid all the vivid scenes
that replay in my head,
when I could be dead,
 
instead flit the pen,
the flutter it dances across the page,
signing
not my life away,
 
but my name,
in another book,
the fifth,
the poetry that has kept me alive,
 
kept me going,
from the time I wanted to die,
words spinning for no reason
to now,
 
hard to believe 
that perhaps destiny
kept me writing,
and I have succeeded.
 
Not in making it big,
not in making money,
but making art.
Five years apart."
Author's Notes/Comments: 

It's been a while! Please stay tuned for what's next! (Serious, this time!)

Lost

I opened my eyes another day seeing only

the same endless ocean. This beautiful,

disheartening endless ocean.

 

A ship with the possibilities to be seen for

many miles. Yet, the oceans waves taunt me

with its excessive, dramatic waves.

 

Concealing me from the eyes of others.

 

This ocean; my best friend, my enemy. The

reason I have discovered the woes of

isolation.

 

Daily I wake up with a heart's desire to see

land, to move onward in my life's journey.

 

The oceans jealousy believes its memories

will be lost, but never. I vow! Caring

nothing for my hearts desire, yet it

mocks me with possibilities. Possibilities

that I might one day feel and experience what is now only memories.

 

my months spent crying, pleading, full of

hateful anger changed nothing. As I awoke

my eyes each morning was locked on the

same blue ocean floor. Deep waves, cool

breezes, moving deep sea passer-bys of the unknown.


I potentially die from the thought of

marriage to this mountain of beautiful

misery.

 

Years of plotting my escape proved to b

e act of a dreamer, not a doer.

 

My heart has grown numb and in my numbness, its torture lacks the effect it once had. I scream to all, my voice stripped and dry, barely heard by even the wind.

 

the silence of my unheard words replaced with the crashes of ocean waves; I will never submit.

Even while my knees have bent and come closer and closer to the panels of stained wood

 

I seemingly lose the courage to keep with my

vow to never submit, yet my vow to leave

this prison of cumbersome water has

engulfed me in disillusion.

 

In my lucid thoughts, I mumble of its

devilish games. The games that I will never willingly accept.

 

I listen to its illustrious melody. I am its mistress, a

the battle that seems impossible.

I am lost...

I am weak...

I will FIGHT till death approaches me.

unclear thoughts

Folder: 
open door's

   I had it all 

     I felt it all 

       I spoke it all

         I gave it all

                                                                                            

Love Happiness Believe Joy

I had it I felt it I spoke it I gave it 

But now it all seems like broken dreams that hornets me

tormenting me leaving my thoughts cold as if, as if

I lost my soul leaving this heart this heart of mine torn.                                         

 

Gap's in my soul filed with

Omens of impeding disaster

Nibbling at the distraction of my life 

Enchanting my heart with death

        

                GONE 

 

         

 

 

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tags:

*Help Me Understand*

 

 April.2.2005

 Trisha Barrek Hopkins

 

How do I go on

When someone dear to me was wrongfully taken

How do I deal with the fact she is gone

God is putting us through hell

The hurt we can't explain

This pain put upon us was mistaken

The way we feel with her loss

We don't know how to tell

The memory of her still fresh in our minds

To bring her back for my mother I'd pay any cost 

Now only above is a lasting storm a lasting rain

 

I'd do whatever it takes to find

A way to put her memory to rest

And help my mother cope and be strong

And make my mom remember all is for the best 

Make her understand

That she's done nothing wrong

 

But how do you help someone go on

How do we go on with our lives 

When she's lost most of all

When she's lost her only angel..her mother 

One who she can no longer call

Even our God

Our one above

Our holy father 

Can't help her up after she may fall

She can no longer tell her mom "I love you"

 

Or celebrate any holiday

Because she is in heaven surrounded by blue

She has no way to talk with her mother

No way to say

The things she holds in her heart

The way my mom really does feel

Now that her mother has part

No one who tries can heal

 

Only her mother had that power

From the start 

But now she's above

With God and his angels in the sky

We can no longer experience her love

Just answer me this 

At a young age of 75 

Why did she have to die

Making memories with her mother she will always miss

 

Copyright

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Dedicated to my nana. I love you and miss you so much. She died of cancer

*You Don't Love Me Like You Use To*

 

 November.3.2013 7:20pm

 Trisha Barrek Hopkins

 

It seems like you're slipping away

This thought could be wrong

I just want you to stay

Our love to be strong

 

I don't want it to be just about sex

Or who could tease more

I just want to hold you till next

I want you to adore 

 

You don't love me like you use to

Like the first day we really met

Then it's like you knew

You had our life set

 

Now it seems like you don't give

You don't hold me as much

Without you I won't live

All the time I want to feel your touch

 

Baby I love you too much to let go

So I hold on

I think you don't know

I hope when you figure it out it's not long

 

You are the only one for me 

There is no way I would leave

Can't you see 

What can I do to make you believe

 

I can't sleep at night

Knowing what I know

How can I make you understand

Your love I just want you to really show

If you're not here where is my heart

Suppose to land

 

I gave you my heart

It seems like you don't care

But everything is falling apart

Why are you so afraid to share

 

Your thoughts and dreams

Together with you would make me

So filled with joy

Together we would make a wonderful team

Someday in the future I'd like to have your boy

 

There is one source of love 

And you and I can cherish

The blue sky above 

If you tell me bye my heart wil parish

 

It's like you don't love me 

Like you use to

Inside my heart bleeds 

I wish you knew

That my heart..you is all it needs

 

Copyright

 

*It's Not Fair You're Gone, But Your Memory Will Remain*

 

 June.23.2010

 Trisha Barrek Hopkins

 

It wasn't your time to go 

I don't care what others say

You were too young This they must know

You still had many days

That belonged to you 

To spend with family and friends 

It's still not fair

Yeah I might not known you for very long

But you left a stain on my life

Enough to touch my heart

Enough to make me care

I could see your one of a kind

I've seen that from the start

You're your own person

You I'll remember as an awesome soul

You had the purest of hearts

Worth more then gold

Here on earth you still belong

I'm so sad you had to part

God must have other plans in store

He took you from the world down below

His request we must not ignore

So to the heavens above you must go 

The angels brought you up through the clouds

To start a new

To be with the ones who went before you

The ones that you knew

And help them with those left behind

To look over and protect

To keep from harm

In everything you will reflect

Always reminding us of your charm

You will be greatly missed

Someone as cool as you in your own ways

I'll never find again

Your friendship was a gift

 

We will be in pain for awhile

Some will cry themselves to sleep

But this is a must we have to walk this mile 

The pain will be steep

To feel the heartace to cry "why him"

Soon the pain will partially go away

But your memory won't be forgotten

You will always be in our hearts

And minds everyday

God taking you this early some may think is rotten

But keep in mind you're really not gone

You are here with us in every way 

From a new born smile

To the warmth of the sun

Even the stars at night

That one shooting star

That's you holding on tight

Waving at us and saying hi

Letting us know your not that far

But we know soon enough we must say good-bye

But not forever and we will keep you in our heart

For we will be seeing you again

So for now we must move on with love

We must go

Not soon....We won't know when 

We will meet again

When God wants us to 

To you our love we will always send

For the short time we knew you 

I am happy to have gotten the chance to know

A man of your kindness

In time my heart will beable to mend

And in my heart your memory will always show

Your memory will live on 

It will never disappear only forever grow

 

Copyright

Author's Notes/Comments: 

dedicate to a friend of mine who died in his sleep

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