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Read my tears

Before my lips

Cause it always come first

I tried to change

I tried to gain your approval

Tried to bring back the smile you had when we first met

and the fire that kept us alive for hours in dark heavens

I tried to turn back time and find my purity

Bowed down and prayed to the Divine

Burned my Nietzsche books

and turned to your Ignatian rules

Climbed the thousand steps of El Salvador

on my knees

Lit two candles in San Pedro Church

and prayed

Abstained myself from Rand and Marx

Silenced the waves of the seas

inside my soul,

the loud beating of my dying heart,

the whispers of the cold wind

Dressed black on Friday nights

Slapped my cheeks with verses

of my sins

Recited the rites of holiness 

to conjure your love

Dried up my eyes from hellish cries...

I swallowed you

Your blood, flesh, and tears

Like a sacrament, I welcomed it all —

even the dark clouds that moved 

around you

Didn't I hear the heavens and saw

the angels in you?

Still, my demons are here to stay and say,

Why am I still not enough for you?

How can be enough for you?

Your tears are precious,

Don’t just waste,

Even a drop of them,

They, not you, are debased!

Move like the calm breeze,

Smile like a flower,

Think like a mediating nun,

Rejuvenate your hidden power!

Stand like a mountain,

Protest as a rebel time and again!

Torn you have found me,

Broken to pieces,

Flattened to a pancake,

Shattered like glass.

This is not my world,

But rather a dark storm,

It will pass,

That’s what they say, that’s what we say.

How can I control the way I feel,

I wish someone could teach me,

I wish I had help,

I wish I did not just shed tears.

But this is not my world,

Just a dense cloud,

It should pass,

But it might just carry me away.

 Febrary.12.2001

 Trisha Barrek Hopkins

In passing time 

We may lose the ones we deeply love

But part of them will still shine

And in our hearts new love remains true

It may be hard for us 

To go on from the past

But for that person they would want us to move on

For thier love will always in our heart last 

And they would want you to stay strong

In passing time 

I will be by your side

Every single day

Your tears don't hide

Every night for you I'll pray

In me please confide

I will help you through days that are tough

Pick you back up when your blue

For you my love I'll always help you when things are rough

This I hope you knew 

Days when you know you're going to cry

Let me know so I can wipe the tears away

When I tell you "I love you" It's no lie

I want to be with you every day

Through sunshine and rain

In every way

So I can take away the pain

In passing time 

You will always come out on top 

Through thick and thin

You are strong and you no one can stop

This struggle You're determined to win

I will be by your side forever

I will always be here

What I want with you is stay together

I will always wipe away your tear

No other guy from you will steal

They won't ever take me away

Because their love isn't real

With you I want to be with everyday

I'm going to stay with you forever

To cherish your touch

To love eachother

To show I love you so much

Through this passing time 

Copyright

 August.30.2000

 Trisha Barrek Hopkins

A thousand tears 

Is all I cry

I'm not running away from my fears

I'm not beliving another lie

My heartbeat no one hears

You told me she's gone for good 

She no longer has your heart

You said you'd forget her completely if you could

But the healing has just begun to start

You said you'd leave I believe that you would

So it may take a little while

To forget her all the way

Just remember you have me 

And that to your face will bring a smile

I'm going no where I'm here to forever stay

Just set your feelings for her free

A thousand tears

Is all I cry

I'm not running away from my fears

I'm not believing another lie

It's time to wipe away my tears

Copyright

I am the shadow, fading into silence

I am the words you shoved in a box

I am blood, sex & violence

behind the symbol of peace

I am light enraptured unto the void

from a thousand years of cosmic darkness

chasing the souls of stars

I am the mirror you wish to avoid

with the tears that coiled down the drain

& the years wasted on nothing--

but what you thought was yourself...

 January.23.2001

 Dedicated to Derrick Mann

Tears come from angels

And well that they should

For no one can give love

The way only they could

The tears of an angel

Are more precious then gold

They nurture our spirit

Allowing love to unfold

The tears of an angel

They come from her soul

We should ask ourselves why then

Could it be because of my role

These tears are not selfish

As at first may appear

They fall for a purpose

It's you she holds dear

If you should happen to be he 

Who started the flow

You got my envy

Aware of great love you could know

I caught the tear of an angel

How lucky could one be 

Though it lasted so briefly

It has forever touched me 

A feeling that will last forever

Something that will never be set free

For this day we'll always be together 

The tears of an angel

Only angels cry

I've fallen in love with you 

For a little while even though we may part

This is no where of saying good-bye

Because my angel you're forever in my heart 

Copyright

When your soul begins to shutter

and the tears run down your face,

When your heart takes on a different form

To escape your fall from grace,

The emptiness you feed upon

The hate which makes you thrive,

Seclusion soon will bury you...

                              and swallow you alive'