Read my tears
Before my lips
Cause it always come first
I tried to change
I tried to gain your approval
Tried to bring back the smile you had when we first met
and the fire that kept us alive for hours in dark heavens
I tried to turn back time and find my purity
Bowed down and prayed to the Divine
Burned my Nietzsche books
and turned to your Ignatian rules
Climbed the thousand steps of El Salvador
on my knees
Lit two candles in San Pedro Church
and prayed
Abstained myself from Rand and Marx
Silenced the waves of the seas
inside my soul,
the loud beating of my dying heart,
the whispers of the cold wind
Dressed black on Friday nights
Slapped my cheeks with verses
of my sins
Recited the rites of holiness
to conjure your love
Dried up my eyes from hellish cries...
I swallowed you
Your blood, flesh, and tears
Like a sacrament, I welcomed it all —
even the dark clouds that moved
around you
Didn't I hear the heavens and saw
the angels in you?
Still, my demons are here to stay and say,
Why am I still not enough for you?
How can be enough for you?
Your tears are precious,
Don’t just waste,
Even a drop of them,
They, not you, are debased!
Move like the calm breeze,
Smile like a flower,
Think like a mediating nun,
Rejuvenate your hidden power!
Stand like a mountain,
Protest as a rebel time and again!
Torn you have found me,
Broken to pieces,
Flattened to a pancake,
Shattered like glass.
This is not my world,
But rather a dark storm,
It will pass,
That’s what they say, that’s what we say.
How can I control the way I feel,
I wish someone could teach me,
I wish I had help,
I wish I did not just shed tears.
But this is not my world,
Just a dense cloud,
It should pass,
But it might just carry me away.
Febrary.12.2001
Trisha Barrek Hopkins
In passing time
We may lose the ones we deeply love
But part of them will still shine
And in our hearts new love remains true
It may be hard for us
To go on from the past
But for that person they would want us to move on
For thier love will always in our heart last
And they would want you to stay strong
In passing time
I will be by your side
Every single day
Your tears don't hide
Every night for you I'll pray
In me please confide
I will help you through days that are tough
Pick you back up when your blue
For you my love I'll always help you when things are rough
This I hope you knew
Days when you know you're going to cry
Let me know so I can wipe the tears away
When I tell you "I love you" It's no lie
I want to be with you every day
Through sunshine and rain
In every way
So I can take away the pain
In passing time
You will always come out on top
Through thick and thin
You are strong and you no one can stop
This struggle You're determined to win
I will be by your side forever
I will always be here
What I want with you is stay together
I will always wipe away your tear
No other guy from you will steal
They won't ever take me away
Because their love isn't real
With you I want to be with everyday
I'm going to stay with you forever
To cherish your touch
To love eachother
To show I love you so much
Through this passing time
Copyright
August.30.2000
Trisha Barrek Hopkins
A thousand tears
Is all I cry
I'm not running away from my fears
I'm not beliving another lie
My heartbeat no one hears
You told me she's gone for good
She no longer has your heart
You said you'd forget her completely if you could
But the healing has just begun to start
You said you'd leave I believe that you would
So it may take a little while
To forget her all the way
Just remember you have me
And that to your face will bring a smile
I'm going no where I'm here to forever stay
Just set your feelings for her free
A thousand tears
Is all I cry
I'm not running away from my fears
I'm not believing another lie
It's time to wipe away my tears
Copyright
I am the shadow, fading into silence
I am the words you shoved in a box
I am blood, sex & violence
behind the symbol of peace
I am light enraptured unto the void
from a thousand years of cosmic darkness
chasing the souls of stars
I am the mirror you wish to avoid
with the tears that coiled down the drain
& the years wasted on nothing--
but what you thought was yourself...
January.23.2001
Dedicated to Derrick Mann
Tears come from angels
And well that they should
For no one can give love
The way only they could
The tears of an angel
Are more precious then gold
They nurture our spirit
Allowing love to unfold
The tears of an angel
They come from her soul
We should ask ourselves why then
Could it be because of my role
These tears are not selfish
As at first may appear
They fall for a purpose
It's you she holds dear
If you should happen to be he
Who started the flow
You got my envy
Aware of great love you could know
I caught the tear of an angel
How lucky could one be
Though it lasted so briefly
It has forever touched me
A feeling that will last forever
Something that will never be set free
For this day we'll always be together
The tears of an angel
Only angels cry
I've fallen in love with you
For a little while even though we may part
This is no where of saying good-bye
Because my angel you're forever in my heart
Copyright
When your soul begins to shutter
and the tears run down your face,
When your heart takes on a different form
To escape your fall from grace,
The emptiness you feed upon
The hate which makes you thrive,
Seclusion soon will bury you...
and swallow you alive'