spiritual

Your White Room

Foetus-like you lay:

Your face exposed,

Pale,

Its skin taut,

Mouth agape,

Distorted;

Your breathing

Echoing

The clock's ticking,

A tiny knife

Its second hand

Slicing,

Slicing you,

Slicing your mind

Into distant pieces;

A White sheet covers you

Withinyoursoundproofroom,

Its window staring out

Into silent cloud,

All outside in

Day's oblivion;

A White cup beside you

Sinks into wall;

Your clothes,

White shirt,

Blue trousers,

Black shoes,

Remain,

Unworn;

Silverwatch and ring, 

Possessions

Unpossessed;

Carers turn you

Over and over,

Your face changes

Over and over

Into different ones,

None are your's,

None are you;

Now you're hidden

Inside me,

A ghost of all you were;

While your bed creaks

The reaper's creeping.

 

 

INTO THE DESERT

Folder: 
2013

With the glory of heaven my soul is filled,

Colors so bright they cannot be seen,

Into pure whiteness all meld,

Music into my heart gently cascading,

Prayers of many, the temple fills,

Tabernacle in purple shrouded,

Robed holy priest passes by,

Prepares all of heaven to celebrate,

Passion of suffering hanging,

Within Mary's heart much sadness lies,

Plants and blossoms of garden gone,

Into the Desert forty days to suffer, 

Misery of my sin upon You rests,

When I am in trouble, Lord, please be with me.

Amen!

View pushkva's Full Portfolio
tags:

Facade of a clown

Seems I worry for no reason.. I fall asleep wishing for a change of season.. 

so much for surrounding yourself with "people that care" ..  we all need some fucking fresh air.

 

in matrimony you bled, everything twisted backwards..

you fled, flew away from your mistake..

she hurt you, it's something that can't be erased..

newly wed, lay in bed... with sorrow written all over your face.

 

was I but your placid escape..? like a rope thrown out to sea, for you who was drowning..

age doesn't matter, because who was counting..?

 

my thigh hurts now.. at least it's only my fault, & no one else.

funny how when people hurt you, they blame you for it..

& when you hurt them unintentionally, they still place blame.

either way, it's all the same.

so that's why I alone, will be the one to hurt myself.

you just stay the fuck away.

the damage is already done, no need for you to put me down.. i'm not a silly clown..

your laughter brings disgrace... I want to rip out your teeth... 

everything you've said to me won't be tossed to the side so willingly..

but i'll try to forget.. & let God take care of my revenge. 

 

whatever you've inflicted upon me, will come back to you.. 

you think you're so righteous, so holy.. the one & only...

you think you've crushed me...

silence will be my greatest defense.. a smile will be my shield..

i'll carry a knife, dug within this heart..

& next time you start, i'll dig it right into you.

 

this battle is far beyond our comprehension.. it's between the angels & demons, God & the devil..

so it might not look like i'm doing anything.. but I have both on my side, both defending me.

because he who knows the war runs deeper then words..

deeper then feeling.. deeper then anything you could possibly see..

will be the one winning. 

the angels know what you've done.. they touch my hand, to re-assure me of their loyalty..

the demons have a chamber for you, down in hell.. you'll be put to work, under a spell..

 

my fragile existence will not crumble..

this crippled mind will not give in... 

you'll be entranced by the spell of eternal misery...

working to pay back the debts you owe, to those whom you've put down..

criticised, judged... beneath that facade, you're the clown.. 

Student Attendance

Folder: 
Spiritual

Constantly floating over my body
Projecting astrally is overwhelming
Imagining this feeling to be permanent
Only to feel a couple seconds
Only to see it is temperary

How disappointing that this could not last
Let me beg for mercy
Let me do it again
Practicing makes perfect
Including descent attendance

Stop laughing at me
Stop insulting a student
Properly willing to learn more
Showing enthusiasm in learning
Experimenting in workshop techniques
Astral projection

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Student of Practice in Astral Projection.

View dark_scorpion's Full Portfolio
tags:

Ballad of the Stars (Incomplete)

'Ballad of the Stars'

 

A Rhapsody composition by; Matthew Wayne

 

 

                                                             In the beginning....

 

 

 

Act I “As the Sun sets.”

 

 

I have been lost for so many years,

I have shed and bled so many tears.

I am lost deep within this never ending labyrinth

desperately trying to make any sense out of this.

So here I am, with visions in my hand

trying to figure out a way I could possibly comprehend.

 

What is a normal life? Is it a loving wife?

Is it a home that I could call my own?

With land kept, and breath taking sunsets.

The cool autumn breeze, just maybe it's all of these things?

What is normal in the eyes of a stranger?”

 

As the sun sets on this strange day,

a whisper of hope these winds say.

On the dieing breath of a heart in chains

now watch the life fade from these eyes.

'The caged lion who slowly dies'

I had given up hope lost my passion.

While in winter watching the death of the sun,

they can strip you of everything,

take your sight but never your dream.

To die with a smile, is to remember what makes life worth while.

 

Act II

'May god forgive me for what I have done.'

 

I am no stranger on the road of sorrow,

crossed that line for the sake of survival.

I have witnessed a hell through my own pale eyes,

I felt the shadow of salvation that was just short of eye sight.

Forgiveness needed for our own stubborn ways, and the ignorance it portrays.

As the echo of the ego's war drums beat, having our humanity running in retreat.

Struggling to save face, from disgrace we quickly lose our grace.

Enable the monsters, the hypocrites to cast you out to sea.

Can you even kill the man in the mirror with your own bare fists?

Cheering victory as you now bleed from the wrists.

Stranded in the road, left for dead till your blood runs cold.

 

Barbarians that feast on the elegance of the swan,

In this cruel world, It's the survival of the strong.

As the wicked things play from dusk till dawn.

Monsters that rape the beauty from the mother of innocence.

Then wonder why an army of son's take up resistance.”

 

I feel death creeping towards my back.

Hell hounds caught my scent, ready for the attack

foaming at the mouth to strike a little more fear.

Locked deep in your dungeon, with just a whisper to keep me here.

Where I had made myself a prisoner to my own mind, my own cell

and through this maze you are not hard to find, after all this is my hell.

 

 

Act III

A tragic tale”

 

 

 

I have traversed madness and even escaped hell,

found love and was ready to set sail

however there is something beautiful to be found in that devil.

 

 

Her sorrows could be matched by no other,

in her arms was her dieing lover.

The moon had nestled against the peeks,

by the mountainside she had waited for weeks.

Her warrior did not show, fear told her to go.

She waged a quest in search, tore through the heavens in pursuit.

Hell be damned, she would find her man.

 

She was beside herself in tears,

under the stars she lived her deepest fears.

The beast was slain, but what cost? What pain?

She looked down into those eyes she had grown to love.

With but a whisper on his dieing breath he shall watch her from above.

 

There is an eclipse over your heart, those tears that tore her apart.

I hear her whisper to the moon, wishing her prayers to be answered soon.

Lost is hope, with no means to cope.”

Author's Notes/Comments: 

I have decided to share the first two "Acts" that have been finished for some time now, as I am still working on the next ones. "Ballad of the Stars" will be by far my "biggest" piece written, I decided to base this artistic piece off of Shakespeares plays and the like. There is a direction/theme here however I had decided that with this I will go with my traditional style/method of writing which I consider open/loose (where the reader can relate it to something completely different then to what another reader would.)

As always I hope you enjoy the read! Comments and Critizisim is welcomed as well.

View matthewwayne's Full Portfolio

Road Rage

 

He gets in the car, with a snarl and a sneer.

Turning the engine, he squints and he peers.

He's in the right, as he rolls down the glass.

You just remember, cause he's not the ass.

 

He's had a bad day,

No surprise there.

He's on the war path,

Not that anyone cares.

 

I'm enjoying my ride, The sun on my face,

When you cut me off, and jump to a race.

You rant and you rave, your hand as you wave,

Your little birdie finger,  so well used & behaved.

 

But light is within me,

Light you can't trace,

And this immeasurable power,

Keeps the smile on my face.

 

You're angry now,

Cause I didn't react.

It's hard to play a game,

When the unexpected,

blows you off track.

 

You stick out your arm,

You flip me the bird.

I smile and I laugh,

I think that you heard.

And when I rolled down my window,

I told you to smile.

Told you to breathe,

take a break for a while.

 

Your anger's confusion,

When I didn't enter the stage,

Is one I'll remember, Forever an, age.

A final look in the mirror,

my face full of bliss,

He growls his annoyance

and i blow him a kiss.

 

His anger deflated,

he seems most ashamed,

As he turns the car round,

He knows he's to blame.

But I don't hold it against you,

You were caught in your pain,

Twisted and knotted,

It's a compulsive game.

 

You tried to lash out,

Not your proudest hour,

Next time try love,

and gain back your power.

 

 

 

 

Author's Notes/Comments: 

I wrote this last week, after the above described incident :) It was the first time being in such a situation, that I found myself completely... unperturbed, by this mans anger. Instead, i yelled out the window that I loved him!! lol. Anyways, i don't think it's very good, just something i had to get out, thought I'd post it just for fun :) PeeCe & LuV

View bellafyre's Full Portfolio

Twisted reality & a wounded love

Realities twisted, lying through your every day lives, seeping in your eyes...

fusion in their very own true colors...

our skin is dead.. the heart is greatest the vessel.

my brain is on overload.. nothing stays in tune. 


Forever packaged in your box of perfect calamity. misery hate's herself, but loves her company..

shadowed by death & the light is to conceal the darkness.

water flows inside us, like our waves of emotions..
Ocean of life, the constant misty rain to trickle despair,

the sand to hold us together & bury the fear sunken beneath it..

I won't ever know if you really love me.

Your mind is almost always ingested with shit.. & then you go & feed it.

although fantasy is my favorite belief, I don't want to be the plaque on your mildly yellowed teeth..

I don't want to be that needle in your arm...

I do wish I could free you from "your reality" of pain..

i'd like to take you on an adventure far away with me.. somewhere we'd both be free.
because in the end I think I know I can ignore & re-create parts of reality to where I need it to be.

I hope one day you'll be able to comprehend that state of freedom mentally.. 

I don't expect automatic acceptance. I know everything is a test..

sometimes, or for the most part, it could make everything seem worthless..

I try my best not to fall on my face.. I live for spiritual feat.

but if what I live for isn't on this earth too, then why is my body here to begin with...?

I feel physically unnecessary.

everything here now just ends up what used to be... i'm not sure if it mean's anything to me..

I miss so many people every second, every passing day... it's like each day is a bigger loss then the one before.

but I guess the soul could just be a gaping black empty growing hole..
Don't get me wrong. I entrust positivity.. but this pain is buried within my identity.

a lot of the time when you'll try so hard to fly... you will end up falling..

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Oct. 2012. 

Oxygen Genocide

when will we learn to discern ego from truth, & justice from what is right or wrong.. 

your skin feels like glass scratching against the surface of my spirit, & who you are is what you shape yourself to be..

but you'll never be a part of what is me.

shaking with some persperation, tied down & untame.

name's without faces...

 

blank plastic figures taking over your home place & shattering what's left of your heart's fragile stained glass case,

cracked & already chipping all over the place.

emotional sea over-riding me. there's never a drought in her desolate, humid mental space.

her own breath she's suffocated by..

further wandering into the forest, dimmer as each one dies.

the air must be experiencing high tide.

oxygen genocide. the smoke get's thicker as time passes you by..

 

climbing ladders, risking your life for status & score.

are we nothing but empty within our core?

destiny must be further out at sea, & these clouds are all that's guiding me.. 

a bit confusing, these doors close behind me..

the shut & slam grows louder each time.

am I walking on a thin line? is there someone there beneath me..?

 

close your eyes, & see further inside.. reality is just a disguise.

if you can refrain, don't let imagery corrupt your mind.

each & every time I come back around from outside the lines, the coloring is always the same.

dull & grey.. not to change...

i'll leave another blood stain on your concrete floor as i'm walking out the door, once again..

I should of never stopped back in.

 

imagine, ponder. your love, paralyzed & controlled by fear.. it doesn't feel like they're really here.

all you thought they were is just a blur, or a phase.

the vibe is in constant change. dampened by the harsh rain.. 

spiritual metamorphosis, brain activity levels to hold sustained.

 

sometimes the screaming within me won't subside.. should I hide?

all I really want is to be one with the sky.

is there only paradise behind the gate's, entering the afterlife..?

Calling Myself

 

A flicker, a flight

Shadows made of light.

A thunder, a blur

It's too much to endure.

 

I crawl to the shadows,

Only to fall out again.

To search for something more,

Some clue, where I might begin.

 

I follow another,

It's a path and a door,

Thinking maybe there's more here,

I press on like before.

 

And to my surprise,

...or maybe it's not,

I got all the way in,

Before I forgot;

My soul's sacred journey

The reason I came,

And so far I've learned,

Everyone else is to blame.

 

A giggle, a smack,

Keep Mr. Ego on track...

A crash and a splash,

illusions melt in a flash.

 

Back on my road,

The path ahead seems long.

Sometimes I worry,

What if I'm wrong?

 

These nibblets of shadows,

That creep through my brain,

Are my only real enemies,

And yet the power they've gained!

 

I close my eyes tight

I focus on my cause

I bless all the world

And give a brief pause.

I thank all the workers,

Those who wield light,

For yours is the journey,

I give my will and my might.

 

There's a sizzle and a fizzle,

As light starts to drizzle.

A crack and a pop,

As everything stops.

 

In my minds eye,

The periscope of my heart,

I wrap myself in this light,

Now I'm ready to start...

 

As the light breaks upon me,

Shadows break and they fall,

And to think all it took,

Was my making a call.

 

 

 

Author's Notes/Comments: 

I've always loved the word "periscope" :o) points for word usage! lol