Facade of a clown

Seems I worry for no reason.. I fall asleep wishing for a change of season.. 

so much for surrounding yourself with "people that care" ..  we all need some fucking fresh air.

 

in matrimony you bled, everything twisted backwards..

you fled, flew away from your mistake..

she hurt you, it's something that can't be erased..

newly wed, lay in bed... with sorrow written all over your face.

 

was I but your placid escape..? like a rope thrown out to sea, for you who was drowning..

age doesn't matter, because who was counting..?

 

my thigh hurts now.. at least it's only my fault, & no one else.

funny how when people hurt you, they blame you for it..

& when you hurt them unintentionally, they still place blame.

either way, it's all the same.

so that's why I alone, will be the one to hurt myself.

you just stay the fuck away.

the damage is already done, no need for you to put me down.. i'm not a silly clown..

your laughter brings disgrace... I want to rip out your teeth... 

everything you've said to me won't be tossed to the side so willingly..

but i'll try to forget.. & let God take care of my revenge. 

 

whatever you've inflicted upon me, will come back to you.. 

you think you're so righteous, so holy.. the one & only...

you think you've crushed me...

silence will be my greatest defense.. a smile will be my shield..

i'll carry a knife, dug within this heart..

& next time you start, i'll dig it right into you.

 

this battle is far beyond our comprehension.. it's between the angels & demons, God & the devil..

so it might not look like i'm doing anything.. but I have both on my side, both defending me.

because he who knows the war runs deeper then words..

deeper then feeling.. deeper then anything you could possibly see..

will be the one winning. 

the angels know what you've done.. they touch my hand, to re-assure me of their loyalty..

the demons have a chamber for you, down in hell.. you'll be put to work, under a spell..

 

my fragile existence will not crumble..

this crippled mind will not give in... 

you'll be entranced by the spell of eternal misery...

working to pay back the debts you owe, to those whom you've put down..

criticised, judged... beneath that facade, you're the clown.. 

AquarianMale's picture

  You have some astonishing

 

You have some astonishing images in your writing. I can “feel” your inflamed, agonizing, bleeding, impassioned emotions, because you write with a special, ardent texture, and a beautiful sense of demonstrative touch. No doubt you are enormously sensitive, strong/resilient, but easily broken at times. Some of your scripts make my own sentiments start to grieve. I like the way you toss such variants out to the reader. That being said, however, I find your rhymes are often too distracting. The splendor of your words, metaphors, and descriptions become maimed in the limerick process. The innate excitement of your natural talents then becomes twisted into the rhymes, rather than allowing your instinctive, feminine intuitions to naturally flow into their own conceptual portraits. I think your word juggling is therefore holding you back. Still, I enjoyed the ride. Thank you.

 

osiriss-'s picture

intense

intense

BlackRainbow0fHope's picture

thank you :D  & yes it felt

thank you :D 

& yes it felt very intense..