
*
https://www.goodnewsclinics.org/fullpanel/uploads/files/fundraiser.gif
November.30.2003
Trisha Barrek Hopkins
I wish you would die
And go to hell
Everything that comes out of your mouth
I can't believe because it's just a lie
To your face I wish I could tell
"I hate you"
Because you're to me no longer real
You are not true
And towards you nothing is what I feel
You try to command
But get mad when I don't obey
I don't know why you can't understand
On what I'm trying to say
For you to just shut up and listen
Is what I demand
I'm not a little girl with the shine in her eye
My eyes no longer glisten
I ask one thing of you "Just disappear, Just die"
In the war no longer you are
That was your past
Way back so far
So stop letting the memory last
Stop in my eyes trying to be this star
I honestly don't care
Your life I don't want to be in
My life with you I don't want to share
Keep trying to control me and my love you won't win
Just disappear
The way you were brought up don't pass on to me
I won't listen I don't care
God from his life set me free
Just die
When I'm finally rid of this prisonment
Then I will beable to happily cry
Untill then in this depression I am sent
This hatered for you I won't lie
Is beyond deep
And this passion of wanting you gone
It's hauntingly steep
These past couple of months
You have been doing things that make me sick
Make me ill
I wish God could of made a better pick
But I'm stuck with you
You think your all that and slick
Well the only thing you are is fake
No where being true
Through your heart will be a wooden stake
God let this ass get his own life
And leave mine alone
Because no matter what I do It's never right It's always wrong
Get it over with.... turn me to stone
So in this life here I won't spend so long
So get it into your mind
There is nothing you can do
Some how some way my own life I will find
So always remember when I'm gone
"I hated you"
September.28.2003
Trisha Barrek Hopkins
I wish you would move on
And leave me alone
I can't stand looking at your face
I can't stand the way you act in disgrace
You're not a man
You're nothing at all
So stop trying to stand tall
Like you did something great
Because everything about you I hate
I want you to disappear
Get out of our lives
Vanish into thin air
Just don't come back here
Your presence I can't stand being near
Because nothing about you I care
In hell you belong
Everything about you is wrong
So rot away
So I can live my life
My way day by day
Without stepping on eggshells
Nothing more to you I have to say
Finally off your high horse you fell
Never seeing you again I pray
Copyright
October.5.2000
Trisha Barrek Hopkins
I wish you would just disappear
From my life
And never come back never reappear
I dont care how you go
Use a pill or even a knife
Give me my freedom
Let me learn wrong from right
Give me a chance
To make my own mistakes
I really don't want to fight
Be real stop being fake
How dare you kick me out
With just a shirt and pants
With all your yelling
There's no need to shout
I hate your attitude
I hate the way you treat me
I hate when you change your mood
Why can't you see
Your always rude
Just let me free
You look stupid the way you stand
All tough and Mr. big shot
You think your the boss the man
But your ugly
Your head steamin your attitude hot
Let me do what I want to do
To go where I want to go
To get away from you
To see people you don't know
Do me a favor
Just disappear
I don't care go away
With a stupid razor
It's your face I don't want to see
And your voice I never again want to hear
Just let me free
Don't give me that stupid stare
Let me be me
You made my life rough
The world let me explore
Why can't you see
I had enough
I don't want your attitude anymore
Copyright
October.15.2004
Trisha Barrek Hopkins
I wish I was stronger
But no matter how hard I try
My wishlist not to igsist just gets longer
More and more I'm left alone to cry
In the late hours of the night
Deep inside no one sees the pain
That I try so hard to fight
The only way to go on is to fill my eyes
With these salty tears
But all I really gain
A blurred vision when I look to the light
Can God not see
I'm so tired and sick of feeling so alone
I guess not because he just lets me be
And eachday my heart becomes more hollow inside
It becomes all stone
This path of pain I am meant to follow
From it I can not hide
And deeper I go into this evil shadow
Because no man shows they care
I just do not want to feel anymore
I have no strength to fight
The demons that drag me to the floor
The pain and hurt inside my heart
They try to store
It's trying so hard to make me die
And some days I wish I would
I no longer want to try
Yes I know I still should
But everyday a piece of me disappears
And is gone forever
I try to scream out"help" to someone
But it seems like no one hears
And the light is fading from the sun
This evil has put a spell on peoples ears
No one hears my helping plea
This evil has made people blind
So no one can see me
Try to fight as I try to find
A way to stop these wounds
So they no longer bleed
But the evil trys so hard
To make me fail
On my pain he loves to feed
I am becoming too weak to go on
But no one will help with the fight
So I should just give up and die
Just disappear fade out sight
As I sit alone and powerless as I cry
As my soul drifts away
From my body it once knew
No longer fighting another day
My days are bitter darkness
No longer a happy clear blue sky
My lifes such a mess
I gave up I try no longer to live
This evil my soul I give
I just sit here in emptiness
I wait to die
I sit and watch my life pass me
As I hear my last word spoken
It's loud and clear
I'm not in any fear
I'm fine as I can be
To say my good-bye
The evil keeps my pain as a token
The tear I cry
My heart is so broken
And I no longer know the word
Or the meaning of the fight
I don't even try
To keep my soul in my sight
Copyright
September-28-2000
Trisha M. Barrek Hopkins
As the land beneath me disappears
And all that is left is space
I start to ask myself if anyone really cares
I cant help but to beat myself at my own race
Its not that the pain
Hurts deep inside
Its not because I'm just ordinary and plain
I mean i have nothing sinful to hide
I just would like people to see
That i need healing
From all the memories that haunt behind me
From someone loving i just want to experience that tender feeling
I don't want to remain as i be
I want to start in "believing"
I want to know how to fly
Escape these Broken wings
That i have had for so long
No more tears i want to cry
I want to be happy and strong
I want to enjoy the bird as she sings
I want to get through the past
Be able to look onto the future
I want a love that will last
I don't want to feel the pain of a broken wing
I don't want the pain of a broken heart
I want to move on and be happy again
My pain full past from it i want to part
I want this pain to be a "finally ending" thing
And for God to bring me that angel he's suppose to send
A everlasting love he's suppose to bring
To protect me as I'm on my way
To guide me through the dark to the light
To wake up fresh everyday
To always be cheery and bright
I no longer want to be bothered by a broken wing
I want to be free to fly
I want a silver protecting ring
I no longer want to cry
Out loud i want to sing
I no longer want to Die
copyright
Gone and running in an irreversible tension
And 10,000 miles left in question
Of ideas we just forget to mention
And the thoughts are left in the dark and disappear
and in comes walking, the unavoidable fear
A unknown direction, a road we somehow got sucked in to steer
Trying to take calm within the unpredictable shadows
Take control of your senses and dodge your arrows
and forget all of the anxiousness that somehow follows
I am a shadow, long gone
I am forgotten, disappointments spawn
I am the weeping, in nights silent hour
From society, who savors the sour
I am the dark, stuck within my fears
I am denied, to them and all who hears
I was a dreamer, now hiding within my sleep
From the all of the promises that I can not keep
I am a shadow, long gone
I loved, and I loved you well.
Even after you challenge me hell
I remember, she parted us, you and I
She kissed your cracks, promising you lies
She left you broken, by the dead
But me, I wanted you by my side, to cherish instead