angry

Twisted Lies

Happiness is what she confides in

As she stares into the night

There's nothing more satisfying

His comfort felt so right

She loves that calming look

As she looks deep in his eyes

But she suddenly has this feeling

That he's holding back some lies

He suddenly turned away from her

Now she felt so tossed

How can someone "complete" you

But continue to feel so lost

As she backs off from him

Her tears flowing down her face

He explains to her so tenderly

That he just needs some space

So weeks went by without one call

She started to feel her rage

He had her where he wanted her

Chained down and in a cage

She caught a glimpse of him one day

Her tummy in a whirl

For what she saw was full of pain

Him kissing another girl

Since that day she caged her voice

She put away her soul

Until that day she married him

And made her heart feel whole<3

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Had a little bit of help writing this from a friend :) but love how it turned out!

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timebomb

 

............

 

most often a walking, 

talking agglomerate 

of bipedal constriction,

incessantly longing

of some scintilla of solitude,

lost were the days of joyous tutelage,

entombed in his most recent 

nightmarish truth,

meandering among a 

stoic and weeping world 

of isolate, but recognised faces,

detached, collapsed, mangled,

crippled and torn 

into bits and pieces of rath

left from the scourges 

of love's albatross still in situ,

every sunset, no rest, 

but amassed density 

within each slumber

and every sunrise 

the burden expounded 

on his withering reserves,

no inkling or cue of enlightenment

knocked upon the doors

of his tortured existence,

and he never meant to unleash

his fury and beat

a four year old 

recently bereft 

of a mother like that,

but somehow,

he allowed himself

to justify it.

 

10:11 PM 7/21/2013 ©

 

.........

Author's Notes/Comments: 

the insidious nature of conditioned response.

View nightlight1220's Full Portfolio

My Inner Demons Are Winning

Folder: 
Depressed.

My life used to be

one giant hulking mess.

and me a weak sodden soul,

padded with distress.

I tried to fight against it

but it kept dragging me down.

Smothering me in regrets

and causing me to drown.

I often sleep for hours

with no desire to wake.

And let the depression take me down

though I know it is a mistake.

SO I begin to look for vices

to let my frustrations out.

Not thinking that I need anyone

to talk to this about.

So instead I grabbed some liqour

enough to put me to sleep

Or drink a drop of cold medicine.

to knock me off my feet.

And sometimes I'd get this feeling

of immense pain in my head.

And take two advils,

then to the world I was dead.

I'd let my demons drag me down,

and tell me it was okay.

That no one cared and I was worthless

and I'd believe what they'd say.

So I'd drink more of stolen liqour

and do what I knew was wrong.

But the allure of my demons was enticing

for they sung a hypnotic song.

So I kept letting them drag me down

and I never expected to get back up.

Just kept giving them my tears

to fill their never ending cup.

I sometimes chose to fight against them

thinking I don't want to let them in.

And then life takes a downwards turn

and I give in to them again.

And though this may be a time, when

 their power over me, is slowly but surely thinning.

Sometimes I can't help but feel,

my inner demons are winning.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Words are red because its painful to admit something is wrong but sometimes its necessary to get rid of some of this darkness.

View dreamingnightmares's Full Portfolio

The Lucky Ones.

Folder: 
Pain and Heartache

I watch them in the park,

The Lucky Ones.

Whose parents hug them tightly,

and wipe faces with thumbs.

I am jealous of them all,

with their happy little smile.

I wish that I could take their place,

and have them be me for a while.

I watch aghast as they get angry,

staring dumbfounded as they scream.

"I hate you, Mommy. Go away!"

all over being denied ice cream.

I wince inside myself,

braced for their punishment they'll get.

But it never comes done,

nothing like the pain I've met.

I watch as they cry,

screaming I don't want Burger King.

I wait for them to be hit,

smacked or kicked... SOMETHING!

But it never does,

and I feel sick inside.

Why does their happiness grow,

as mine slowly died.

I love to watch them be dragged away,

finally treated like me.

All the while complaining

and saying stop I have to pee.

Then they disobey again,

and run off towards the swings.

Slipping away from their parents

and jumping off of things.

Then finally they get caught

and I watch them cry.

Their parents pick them up

saying tell your friend goodbye.

They bound over and hug me

I squeeze back a little too tight.

Wishing all over again

that I could be them for one night.

Too have mommy hug me

and daddy shower me with love.

Bedtime stories and warm cookies

for their little dove.

But instead I must go home

to face my papa's fists.

While momma drinks to ignore my cries,

and cigarette smoke settles in like mist.

Then I wish anew and once again

that I was like other daughter's and sons.

That daddy and mommy would change,

But i guess that's just for the Lucky Ones.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Its about children who are abused looking at other "normal" kids and wondering why they can act out without being punished and wishing they could lead their lives. Basically its about being grateful that you have parents who care enough not to beat or mistreat you

Overwritten Despondency

every breath I take is another mistake, each exhalation, lingering in this lonely space..
i'd love to just break down & cry.. but puff, pass, i'll let out another deep sigh.. 
the taste of your skin is like... pale sin.
& your smile as dead as the love that's spiraling downward into the drains of past content..
it filters out all the shit.
your eyes feel like daggers, when they're on me..
maybe that's why you can't truly see.. why do you even bother to criticize me.. why hasn't God set me free..?
 
like a fish, starving.. going in circles, de-sha-vu, I don't remember you..
but my intuition tells me otherwise.
an insect, hearing it's last words...
crushed, beneath the foot of mankind.. what sort of man is really all that kind..?
a bird, rattled in a cage.. shaken up.. absorbing rage..
being fed the scum that's left, to hold you sustained..
 
it's like not being able to turn to the next page..
& everyone keeps writing over the page i'm on, & telling me to read it once again.. & again.
until it's all scribbles, on top of one another.. it makes no sense..
you might as well be spitting on me... this is an overwritten despondency...

Heartbreak

Heartbreak :(

My heart
So brittle it breaks
Oh dear has it been staked!

My heart it cries it coos
Pumps out emotional goo

My heart it mourns it sigh
But none can see its plight

My heart it cries for you
To feel the same way too

When will this heartache mend
When will this torture end!

My heart so heavy ,grows numb
In despair it succumbs...

Author's Notes/Comments: 

A poem invented in the split of the moment . Please feel free to critic!! :)

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Let Me Reflect Upon Myself

I’m angry, I’m angry
Why am I so angry?
My brow’s always furrowed
My chest filled with angst.

I’m sad, I’m sad
Why am I so sad?
I no longer feel my tears
My face always numb.

I’m confused, I’m confused
Why am I so confused?
My mind’s a lost cause
They’ve all deemed me insane.

I’m lonely, I’m lonely
Why am I so lonely?
In a room full of people
I still talk to myself.

I’m scared, I’m scared
Why am I so scared?
I can smile when addressed
But the rest is a mess.

I’m lost, I’m lost
Why am I so lost?
I’ve been wandering for years
I don’t want to be found.

Parents Prayer

Long are the days when a parent waits and prays
Prays for their children to live a joyful life
Prays that their days are full of enjoyment not strife
Yet here we all stand
Afraid of every woman and man
Who do we trust and how can we know
if they will be safe when we let them go?
My heart is heavy with sadness and worry
For there are dangerous people
filled with evil and fury

Author's Notes/Comments: 

The events from Dec 14, 2012 are weighing heavily on my mind and sometimes poetry helps me let it out.

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Road Rage Wuss

Folder: 
Erik's Poems

Pay attention
to the tension
fingers on the steering wheel
gripped as tight for bending steel
red and racing, raging mind
wishing mayhem on mankind
an air of chronic malcontent
lights his eyes with vile intent-

“DON’T LOOK AT ME!
I’LL SLAP YOU SILLY!
I’LL TAIL YOU ALL THE WAY TO PHILLY!
I’LL MAIL YOUR BODY PARTS TO CHILE!!”
all within his vehicle
he’s wicked and maniacal!

But
pay no mind to little man
protected in his rolling can
the same man who has cast this wrath
tonight will take a bubble bath
kiss his kids and wife and then
tomorrow rage on roads again……..

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