Death of Infatuation

Light and Dark

I've never seen an angel bleed

Till I stood with knife in hand

I've never seen a devil cry

Till I looked once through it's eyes


You were my drug

Long before I acclimated

Long before withdrawal

I needed you to survive


I can feel your eyes on my back

Can't you hear me?

I'm silent on the outside

But screaming on the inside

I'm soul-lost

I can't find who I am anymore


Maybe I'll be fine

Perhaps I will survive

But I just don't know if

I can outlast your memory


If I lose myself in drugs and dreams

Or fly away to places and things

To fill the gap you left behind

Consuming body, soul, and mind


But there is no need

To conjure dreams

When life comes

In such radiant colors


They say Pandora is to blame

Her curiosity brought us pain

And fear of darkness in the night

But there was hope in candle-light


From the dark, a light will shine

Before the day, the night has gone

And now we know it burns so fine

That is why it's called, breaking dawn.


And maybe, just maybe

That which dies gives birth to something new


Author's Notes/Comments: 

Needs a better title

—Untitled 04/26/2017 [04:26]




'Tis not that simple

to understand why we cry

There is no single reason

why we also smile


My sense of distinguishing

between the the two

extremes have become 

a mirage


And there were only a few

Who really could reason well

For I have not known love

As if it's as intimately—as you

Author's Notes/Comments: 

This is a repost from my Twitter platform, created during a specially quirky situation (specified only as an untitled poem, & w/c was done on the fly at around 4:26 AM on April 26, 2017).  This is its edited version.

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The Way It Is

My eyes seek you, to examine you, feeling you.

Though fully clothed, I know your body completely.

My voice softens, hoping to hypnotise and entice.

My touch, gently caresses you like a flickering flame.

Ever present the danger of your passion erupting.

I tempt you, even though you don't desire me.

You know I can make you feel ecstasy, absent to you

Yet something your young curious body longs for.

That desire alone so strong, yet still you hold back.


Would you give in if I push, can you keep saying no.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Trying to speak whats there...not to be so structured.

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Girl after a girl: Events unforgettable



Part I


1) With a ‘to’ and a ‘fro’ in her throat,

something she did note,

as on a piece of paper, she wrote

"I can't like you, for you don't know -

I got to go away - to which I can't say No."

Well, every girl is so so pretty.


2) With her legs beside me, so stiff

and -to save me- her hands with great mischief,

she conveys to the punishment chief -

"Oh Ma'am? How can he be guilty?

As this is his first moment to my proximity!"

Well, every girl is so so pretty.


3) With all her teeth and gums out

and her tiny eyes so stout,

she beckons me with a shout -

"Go! I won't talk anymore to you.

How much I am hurt, you never knew."

Well, every girl is so so pretty.


4) With real tears in her eyes

and five of her fingers glued to rice,

maybe yes, twice - she cries -

"How would you know how much I moan!

For, never you, I am disturbed alone."

Well, every girl is so so pretty.


5) With a big grin at my face,

but with a big cry, the very next phase,

at my back this time, she says -

"He wouldn't have really scolded me,

If, even little, he had ever read me."

Well, every girl is so so pretty.


6) With a rise in all her gaze over the book,

when asked for her verses, she gave me an eerie look.

Soon, she wrote for me; Almost a month it took! -

"Though difficult, try to remember me

for, perhaps many for you, though you're alone for me."

Well, every girl is so so pretty.


From a girl, only another girl keeps one away,

but not from past nor future, for there're many more girls, I say.

An event with a girl can give a great kick start

that can lead anyone, till many suns set.

Memories of brain written from heart -

a few of many incidents I could not forget!


Part II


7) With drops falling down as she bends

her neck, in some reunion -she attends

after a year- she tells our friends -

Long back, He stopped talking to me.

Neither a hello nor a glance – as if I’m his enemy.

Well, every girl is so so pretty.


8) With a smile -she leaves the lab- too fake one

and with swollen eyes -returns in- pointing none.

Then, a message leaves her, following the sun -

A friend can be anything, but not a sister!

So, please don’t ever call me so, you mister!

Well, every girl is so so pretty.


9) With good red expressions – contorted,

while issues were being sorted

out about my interest in her, her words parted –

Oh, now please stop it! I want no fight.

I understand it and it’s completely alright!

Well, every girl is so so pretty.


10) With her ideas so optimistic,

though actions far realistic,

she typed something very mystic -

Had you worked, excellence of now would have been average

Anyways, any failure to be understood needs courage.

Well, every girl is so so pretty.


11) With her face full of joy and hope

and beliefs no less than some pope,

she always replies, to my theory of mortality, with nope -

The word End, with someone can also be Never,

for the person may know words like Forever.

Well, every girl is so so pretty.


12) With a look so cheerless, that can shrink

one’s heart -though sometimes so cheerful that can kink

it’s beat- she said or typed - I think -

Really miss you as I sometimes also saw my ex in you.

You played big part in my life, though days were very few.

Well, every girl is so so pretty.


Lies apart, any girl can make your day,

no matter whether you are a guy, girl or a gay

This is a small tribute to a small part

of all the girls I met.

Memories of brain written from heart -

a few of the incidents I could never forget!



Author's Notes/Comments: 

A saga written as a ode about incidents revolving in mind, involving a few of the girls I met. Their sounds still ring in my head!

An Expression Of Love

I am gravely sorry
That you hold pain within you.


We share love,

Whether you choose to accept it
In your reality or not.


I am empathetic towards your pain.


I am not a psychiatrist.
I am not a psychologist.
I do not know how to control your delusions,
Only you know how to do that.


I do know this.

When you can clearly see,
That keeping your mouth shut,
Instead of opening it,
Is hurting far more people
Than it is helping...'s time to open your damn mouth.



05/19/2013 10:04 AM ©

Author's Notes/Comments: 

We all choose our delusions in life.


Letters To Andy


Confessions of a love-drunk teen,
Here's where mine begin:
Your smile makes it impossible
For me to ever win.
A single scent of coffee
Reminds me of Tuesday nights;
You are embedded in my mind
With every sound or sight.

Confessions of a sad brunette,
Here are all I keep:
To order a caramel brûlée
Has become the highlight of my week.
To watch you do the simplest tasks
Like tidy, sweep, or brew
Can stir up dormant feelings;
It's existence, I never knew.

Confessions of a desperate girl,
Here's where mine arise:
I can't avoid the images
Of your eyes when I shut mine.
Hours feel almost infinite,
And never wish to pass.
Each second cruelly reminds me
When it was I've seen you last.

Confessions from my heart to yours,
Swear to say it not:
The way I feel when I see you
Reminds me of what I forgot.
I lost the sense of longing
Which I felt too far ago;
I've obliterated butterflies
That used to keep my dreams afloat.

But now I recall happiness,
Alongside joy and glee.
How peculiar that you'd make
A mad fool out of me.
The absurdity in wanting you
Is as insane as it can sound.
Do I care? I laugh at the thought
That their words could tear me down.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Another note for the barista I've grown quite fond of. Probably too fond, but that doesn't seem to change much.

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I want YOU


If we were on another level we could be together, on another plane where no one can interfere.
We could disappear & you would be mine. I would make you mine if I could, but we only exist here.
It would be perfect woven patterns of beautiful dreams, something not so surreal.
I yearn to be with you and my heart is burning with desire, where are you?
I walk around like a lemming following anyone around that will lead me to you.
I dare not even turn the music on while I search, the sound is too painful.
When I look into your mesmerizing blue eyes it’s like being dropped into freezing water and all I see are the explosions of our undying love sparkling throughout.
Just the thought of seeing your face again gives me the strength of 1000 men, courage of a lion, riches that have no price tags.
It's unbelievable what I would do just to hold you again, to smell you, kiss you.
Being without you it's like being in a bad dream, I am so small and the world around me is immense.
It's like being under the water and looking out trapped inside.
It contradicts the freezing water and now I'm burning but the desire is gone because you stole it bitch.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

not done

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His Obsession

An angel's feather falls gracefully from the heavens,
Glowing, in the heaven's ray which guides her path.
She floats preciously, endlessly...

A celestial rook is diligent in his charge.
Crowded masses desperate for a look,
a gentle whisper from her lips...

He prevents the protrusion of her path.
His true purpose unbeknownst to all,
His own desire for a kiss.

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Love and romance

Whenever we talk, she takes my breath away.
And that heart I am missing just might be in her pocket.
I find I just cannot form the words I want to say.
This feeling, no, I cannot knock it.

That heart I am missing just might be in her pocket.
I truly hope it is, because there is no one else.
This feeling, no, I cannot knock it.
There is no one else I'd want mastering my pulse.

I truly hope she is, because there is no one else.
I truly hope she is feeling the same way about me.
There is no one else I'd want mastering my pulse.
It's wrapped in her arms, that I want to be.

I truly hope she is feeling the same way about me.
I find I just cannot form the words I want to say.
It's wrapped in her arms, that I want to be.
Whenever we talk, she takes my breath away.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Written for Michelle, the sweetest, most beautiful lady in the whole world.

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