You think I'm the one who gave up on us
But have you looked in the mirror lately?
Your reflection is faded like a ghost
Your eyes are black and your soul is empty
And you swear you're not the one
And that this argument is done
And you think I'm on the run
When, in fact, I'm fucking done with you
I'm gonna make it through
The hell you put me through
I'm gonna bury you
I am done
You think you're the one who's gonna save us
But you can't save yourself from imploding
You're swimming around in your own disgust
Your narcissistic ways are showing
And you swear you're not the one
And that this argument is done
And you think I'm on the run
When, in fact, I'm fucking done with you
I'm gonna make it through
The hell you put me through
I'm gonna bury you
I am done
Erase me
I'll erase you too
Replace me
Now I know we're through
You think you're the one who's gonna save us, but you can't save yourself
I'm fucking done with you
I'm gonna make it through
The hell you put me through
I'm gonna bury you
We are done
Verse 1:
If only I had more time,
Home would not seem so far.
I’m so far from home.
Did you forget you were my home?
‘Cause home is whenever we’re together.
I don’t know what to say or where to begin.
I won’t trade our love for anything.
No one will love you better than me.
Chorus:
If only we could getaway,
Home is a feeling I’ve buried in you.
I’m alright. I’m alright.
It only hurts when lies are believed to be true.
Freedom is shattering the lies
And making way for the truth.
I’ll be your anchor. I’ll be your everything.
If only we could be together, for eternity.
Verse 2:
If only I could be the one to guide you home,
The ocean waves crash onto shore.
The waves wipe away the messages in sand
That I’m trying to send to you.
If only we’ll become each other’s anchor,
Home will not seem so far.
Home is a feeling we’ve buried in each other.
If only time was on our side.
Bridge:
Are you ready to give your love to me?
Are you ready to make me your home?
‘Cause I’ve been thinking lately,
That you could be the one
That could save me from the misery.
If only, right here, right now,
We could become each other’s everything.
Home is a feeling we’ve built in each other.
You rushed in like a forceful wind.
You did not ask, you just let yourself in.
I tried hard to stop it but I was not strong.
You tore down the bricks that made up my walls.
Standing there as bare and naked as I could be.
That is when you crept in and stole me.
Small sweet words were all it ever took.
To keep me swimming for that silent, sharp hook.
The screams inside my brain would never cease.
I cupped my hands around my ears and scrunched up my face.
I cried and tossed and turned, trying to sleep.
But those mountains of guilt were far too steep.
I tried to go and told you no more often than not.
Sugar laced whispers were your only shot.
Like a starving child I reached out my hands.
Only to find two fistfulls of sand.
I let it slowly sift through my fingertips.
Watched it fall away as if it never did exist.
I stood up tall once more and looked out at the sea.
Raced toward the waves, leaving behind the shell who once was me.
I looked back once and saw you kneeling on the shore.
And I smiled because I did not fear you anymore.
We have been talking for ten years. Friends for5 at first. However together for twn
I broke the southern lady code and asked how he felt about marriage.
He said as long as we are together in God's eyes. He's not afraid of being in a
committed relationship.
Together in God's eyes.
My sister says we are already family. My daughter calls him stepdad. He calls my daughter his bonus kid and stepdaughter. He loves her so much.
I am proud to be in a God ordained committed relationship.
I will be in it for the rest of my life and grow old with him
I am the fucking cherry
that gets left on the plate
I am recreating a dirty kitchen
without making any room for reward
I have screwed up all my chances
made this home spell out the world crumble
and kicked out all the houseguests
at least the devils still here
are paying me for something
I can’t usually explain
the things that make my heart hurt
and these people have their own fucking friends
who will tell them everything is okay
they are okay
I can’t usually explain
why my heart has not taken me out to dinner
in a few decades
why my mind keeps slipping down the mountain
why I sit here with exactly what I want
still thinking up ways to make a tragedy out of it
so I publish all the gray on my desk
and leave out the color
so I keep buying clothes that don’t fit
running around in them
and being confused when the world looks strangely
so I keep going out with someone else’s face on
and forgetting it’s there
when I look in the mirror
but sigh shrug and say
at least it’s better than mine
so I sit here and set the room on fire
and when that’s not enough
I strike a match to the fire
and when other pieces of me
come in
I hear
why would you do this?
because I’m not you
Verse 1:
I carefully craft an image of you
In my mind.
But, sometimes, the reality does not match
The illusion in our dreams.
This is not how it should end
But, how it should begin.
Tell me: where do we go from here?
Chorus:
I am getting over you.
Though, the pace was slow.
I never needed to test my feelings for you.
But, you, you felt the need to test the waters.
Now, I’m left with nothing but our memories.
You got me in unbound memories.
You shattered my soul and spirit.
Verse 2:
Though, I don’t need to know your sins.
You will be a scarlet letter for the world to see.
Your past continues to haunt you.
Christ cannot save you from your sins.
You confessed your sins to me.
You dragged me along yet
Always looked for someone better.
Bridge:
If only you could see
That I know your story
Better than anyone,
We could become each other’s everything.
Though, I don’t know what lies ahead,
I’ll follow you wherever you will go.
Our lives are caged in together.
What do you want from me
What future do you see for us
I want to know what you want from me
I want to know what I can do for you to see me
I hate the feeling of being vunerable
Why does my feelings feel invalid
Why can I not express myself to you
Why can't I open up to you
What is wrong with me
I am standing in front of you
You stare right through me
I am looking at you
You are looking down at your phone
The gratification you receive from social media
The addiction you have developed
How do you see me
How do you feel about me
Am I attractive enough
Am I funny enough
Am I not emotional
Am I good enough
Where do I stand with you
I never know
Your words mean so little
Your actions show me more
I am disheartened
I am dissatisfied
I feel insignificant
I feel empty
I wish you werent distracted by everyone but me
Will I ever feel good enough for you
What do I need to do
I am the physical form of things I don’t want to feel
I wake up with the world’s tears on my shoulders
and yesterday’s sweat in my eyes
when half the world is asleep
I am callous and cruel and a million more things
as the ghosts keep throwing me questions
I don’t have the answers to
please see me as more than a pile of the
shit I put you through
cause when the walls burn down I keep building windows
I keep trying to see you