PostPoems Be Artistic. Be Creative. Be Inspired!

Lord, I'm on my knees again

Because the worst has happened

The death of a loved one

The loss of a job

I can't pay the bills

My wife no longer loves me

So I'm here today

Before the Lord of creation

The First and Last

And perhaps the best I can say

Is a hollow hallelujah

From an empty heart

“The Lord gives, and the Lord takes away

Blessed be the name of the Lord.”

For who knows

Perhaps by my suffering

Someone else may be blessed

Someone else might have hope

Someone else might see You through me

I can't see the future

I don't know the greater plan

But I believe, but I Know

That even in the hardest of times

I can rely on You to carry me

When I fall, let me fall into Your arms

Please take this broken life

This shattered jar of clay

And shape it into the man

That You need me to be

I trust You

I love You

And because of these

I know that I'll be ok

The saddest eyes in a world of gray

Full of hurt, and the weakest strength

Windows to a tortured brain

Courting madness to look sane

I see the darkness around your face

That you try to hide away

You've lost the will to live again

Subject to recurring pain

The wrinkles flow around your features

Like roiled and cracked imprints of creatures

Growing old while in your prime

Extenuate the charm of time

The mouth is small and bares it's teeth

Silent when it ought to speak

Chewing when it ought to stay

Cursing the good days away

Stepping back

Now I see

It's simply a mirror

Reflecting me...

When boy meets girl from the other side,

Things were moving very fast.

No one could have ever imagined,

Things have gotten so serious.

Lots of secrets need to expose,

Lots of lies need to explain.

Hearts torn into pieces,

Don't know which way to go.

During that short time,

Things felt real, sadly its not.

Choose your man wisely,

That's all I have to say.

It's very simple, we were blessed with the "Satisfied gene"...

They were not.

We know when enough is enough...

They do not.

We can let it go...

They cannot.

We thought we did something good...

They did not.

We don't hold it against them, we just smile cause,

We know something they don't know...

It's very simple...They got the "NOT" gene!

I need the courage
And the force within
To set my mind to encourage
My inner evil sin

It's not soon time
But one day it will
This inner feeling of mine
To make me finally still

The method is concealed
Deep in my thoughts
Protected by a shield
Maybe theres use of watts¸

Or will I have to climb
To give me a leap of faith
And calm this life time
So I can finally see my wraith
 

Streaming vaporous amusement
Flows through the sky
As I start to wade into battlement
Hoping I don't die

War is running a mock through
The muscle coming up my leg
Turmoil stops me from going to
The den of the enemy brig

Courage fights the fear
Of being taken over by ice
Territory of enemies shear
Pricks of cold bravery the price

Overtaken with being scared
I go back to the hypocrite space
But with a smile to be shared
I've beaten my record on pace

Shivering but rallied up
Not trudging but announcing
That I drank most the filled cup
Destination reached by living

At least one of us gets to be happy I guess
One of us always seems to get happiness
That’s not the problem I have here
The problem I have is this ever growing fear
That the one who gets happiness will never be me
Once second we re in love the next you’re taken away from me
Found happiness with someone else
And I m left alone
Like a used rag doll on the shelf
They say everyone supposed to find someone
I guess this time it was your turn
And again my heart comes undone
I am just sitting here hoping that after a while
Of all this pain that comes
With trial after trial
That my heart will be torn to the point
That I cant put it back together again
Then I ll never have to deal with the pain within
I won’t blame you I can’t blame you
But I do feel like a fool
For thinkin I could ever satisfy you
Cuz it always seems like being my best
Is never enough to impress
Anyone anywhere anyhow
Why I even try anymore I just don’t know
For all this pain I got nothing to show
I m sure you don’t wanna hear this now
I ll make sure you never will
Wont take away from what you have now
Just gotta express this for myself
For the sake of my sanity
I just wish you and me could be
but it cant be
cuz I couldn’t make you happy
guess it means I don’t deserve happiness
cuz this time it was at least one
at least one
that can be loved
at least one that finds love
at least one
that can be free
at least one
that can be happy
I m just sayin that its to bad
That the one can never be me

I finally found someone to spend my life with

And my father has to go and stick his nose in

The middle of my business and tell me

That he doesn’t want me talking with him

And threatens to turn off the Internet

And he wonders why I have such an attitude

Toward any and everything he wants from me

Because I know that anytime I am talking

To any goddamned person I am going to

Hear him run his mouth

Because he is so afraid to lose me again

Just like he almost lost me once

And he wonders why I give him

            Such an attitude; if daggers could come

            Outta my eyes, he would be dead

Yea I am grateful that they didn’t let me go

To a damn assisted care facility, but damn

Does that really mean that I have to give up

            Everything that I am working so hard

            To achieve without him?

Does it mean that I cant have any sort of

Relationship with anyone but my family?

Does it mean that I have to give up

            Any sort of personality that I might

            Think about wanting to have?

~Chrystal

Written on

November 11, 2010