Lessons

You Don't Know Me (Reprise)

I’ve proven people wrong before.

You are hardly an exception.

 

You said I should be single for a long time.

Venting to my friends who were right about you was the real medicine.

And plenty of boys say I’m a catch before they get to know who I am.

 

You said I need to grow up.

But you’re unemployed and you bash a girl that was slandered by her best friend.

I love being told what a snotty person I am both at work and when I’m with you.

 

You said I’m self-absorbed and immature.

I saved an artist you cruelly envied on his birthday from a debt that was killing him slow.

It was the best 30 pounds I ever spent this week because it was out of selfless love.

 

You said you deserve so much better than me.

You tried to gaslight me into thinking that no living soul is good enough for me.

You took the easy way out instead of bearing with me a little longer.

 

You said I don’t understand how relationships work.

That’s all you’re right about because what one person doesn’t find sexy might attract another.

So neither do you.

 

You said a piece of you will always love me.

You were just kidding yourself when you said that.

Some therapist you’re turning out to be, dearest.

 

It felt hazy that I pondered for days or even weeks

On how I was going to repay you for your compassion and charity.

You don’t deserve to know what I had planned for you.

 

If you somehow worm your way back into my life,

I won’t be crying my eyes out like the time when a bastard was unfaithful to you.

Instead, I will stand my ground like a rock and kick you in the crotch.

 

You had one opportunity to take things slow so we could get along.

But you’re not getting a second chance because I don’t trust you.

Does this explain why you claim I don’t love you?

 

Fast-forward to last week to the part where I started anew with another dude.

He’s a scary one that could do more damage to you than me.

He loves me for everything you hate about me.

He’s the kind of boy whose easy to set aside time for

While I hit the books and explore the world because he’s along for the ride.

 

I couldn’t be more attracted to him every time he touches me to say, “You’re mine.”

It’s not because he desires to put me on a leash and lock me up.

It’s because he understands where I’m coming from and he too thinks “give and take” is crap.

Yet, he loves me like the Holy Grail because he tells me that I’m the best part of every day to him.

 

Relationships are like snowflakes.

No two function the same way because people are complex creatures with different standards.

Yours certainly were a mystery and to this day, I wondered how it all went wrong.

Our final days were a thin line between love and hate.

I already know which direction you went.

That’s one thing you and the monsters in my nightmares have in common.

Sometimes Enlightenment is all.

....

 

Heated tongues had no temperance to spare 


Betrayal is a fickle master cloaked in innocence 


Eyes held truths with no regards to context 


Illusions were never more real than when piercing

The heart left to bleed pounding desperately on the floor

Under the foot of merciless pain 


How do you explain the inexplicable? 


Some things just end while others start


The resoning was perfectly logical 

But damned if anyone could see it


Because faith seemed a too bigger thing 

To hold through this broken prism

 

Off they went onto seperate trajectories

Only to find the truth revealed in years of wastedness

 

It was only when they travelled around it in oposite motions

They could see they belonged together


Far too late,  as other sattlites they collected were now in the way

And faith seemed once again bigger to hope for


And not a thing was learnt. 

 

 

....

 

 

 

 

 

Heated tongues had no temperance to spare 

Betrayal is a fickle master cloaked in innocence 

Eyes held truths with no regards to context 

Illusions were never more real that when piercing

The heart left to bleed poundind desperately on tge floor

Under the foot of merciless pain 

How do you explain the inexplicable? 

Some things just end while others start

The resoning was perfectly logical 

But damned if anyone could see it

Off they went onto seperate trjectories

Only to find tge truth revealed in 20 years of wastedness

Because faith seemed a too bigger thing 

To hold through this broken prism

It was only when they travelled around it in oposite motions

They could see they belong together

Far too late as other sattlites were in the way

And faith seemed once again bigger to hope for

And not a thing was learnt.

 

 

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Sometimes you need to shine alight on yourself.

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He cackles when you're in shackles

Folder: 
Medicine

Coyote is a trixter

A backwards clown
He'll do anything
Anything
To see you frown
 
But don't think he is bad
Though he is rough and tough
He's teaching you a lesson
Just listen to his laugh 
 
He will come around
To show you all your fears
He'll bring you to a place of terror
Just to see your tears
 
The tears he brings will cleanse you
Be sure to let them out
Then find a way to join him
When you hear his family howl
 
 

A Better Place, A Better Time

I glanced to see your empty seat not far

away from mine. I did not know you well

before your name marked every mind. I got

the news my freshmen year at Aries’ end.

The open casket frightens me, a fear

to peer inside.  Depression lurks and maims

the ones we love, no way to say goodbye.

The cries I heard your mother make in words

I can’t describe. Your close best friend, a friend

Of mine, still thinks of you in times of light

and shade; He sits and waits for you to call:

the promise made, be kept today. I learned

from you don’t hesitate. To think of dreams

you’ll never have or places never seen,

I missed the chance to know your truth and who

you want to be. But now I see for me

to be the who I want to be; I must

help those like you live on, it’s not your time    

to leave.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

with inspiration drawn from beloved Javad, rest in peace. with intentions to direct those in need to the song A Better Place, A Better Time by Streetlight Manifesto

Acsending

Folder: 
Prevailing

And what is life?

But the art of dying

Where oblivion awaits

In the darkened corners of the mind


And what is paramount?

But the art of adventure

Where lessons are learned

In the openness to find


Factions of ourselves demand

Affection amongst pain

Where through the toiling ripples

Is where we’ll truly gain


Esteemed worth established

Through the artful grace of breath

A book of legacies transcribed

Our lullabies of death

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Ponderous Pathes

Folder: 
Prevailing

And with the intertwining roads

That stretch for miles

Ourselves are scattered along the country side

For we leave legacies of our trials


Not carried off in the freeing air

But eternally grounded for you and me

So we can look back on our dusty path

And witness a transformation to be seen


Bits and pieces of ourselves become fractures all a while

Breaking us, mending us, healing us, in time

Our inevitable crutch of character

Blossoming into who we need to shine

Author's Notes/Comments: 

For without the oldest parts of us, the newest would be nevermore.

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Not the One

Folder: 
Prevailing

 

In the beginning I was lost,

 

I was confused.

 

Rusted in years of decay

 

With nothing to lose.

 

You came in like a lightning bolt

 

You struck me where I stood.

 

Didn’t know of what was looming.

 

I never know what I should.

 

 

 

Life is funny like that.

 

You know what you know when you know.

 

I needed to take the harsher road.

 

Needed to hit my lowest low,

 

And I was low.

 

 

 

I’ve been overcome and I’m on my knees.

 

Weary, miserable and shrieking with please.

 

Never knew what I needed,

 

Never knew what I needed,

 

Till right now.

 

 

 

That night was so right,

 

Not for you but for me.

 

Your tears ran

 

And I knew that I was free.

 

I remember the sound of the stairs,

 

As your feet smashed on every step.

 

The way the door slammed behind you.

 

And I how I closed my door of regrets.

 

 

 

I was trembling in my bed

 

I finally dared myself to stand.

 

I needed to take the harsher road

 

Needed to come up with my own plan

 

Oh, what a plan.

 

 

 

I’m not overcome and I’m not on my knees.

 

No longer weary, I’m smiling with ease.

 

Never knew what I needed,

 

Never knew what I needed,

 

Till right now.

 

Author's Notes/Comments: 

The struggle of letting someone go to be the real you. People come and go in life as lessons.

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Of dog and man

In the beginning, man was friends with all the animals in nature, and they shared their meals, played and foraged together. Foxes, bears, cats, dogs, raccoons and all the other animals encounter at the big house in the middle of the forest, where every night a giant bonfire was built and everyone sat around and told stories to the others; many boastful tales were shared and many laughs were had around that big cozy bonfire. Since there were so many animals to help man, many stayed at the meeting place and helped with the daily chores, while others helped man bring in the meals for the day. The bear was especially good at finding the berries; with his big nose he could always find the plumpest, juiciest berries in the forest. The fox was very jealous, and told the raccoon “We should sneak out at dawn to find the best berries, that way the bear won’t get all the credit.” The raccoon, being the best animal at sneaking, agreed and they were on their way. The cat, which always stayed the whole night awake looking for his favorite plants, noticed something was amiss when he arrived at the house: “Where are the fox and the raccoon? It was their turn to tend the fire.” The big bonfire had started building up, and was about to reach the ceiling and start burning the house. The cat, being always a bit selfish, decided to escape without telling anyone that no one was caring for the fire. Once the fire started consuming the ceiling, the dog woke up with an alarmed bark: “Smells like burning, smells like a fire! Wake up!”. Suddenly all the man that stayed in the house where trying to put out the fire with everything they could, blankets, soil and other materials that the few animals that stayed brought. As the fire ended consuming most of the house, and a lot of its habitants were injured badly by the fire, in came the fox and the raccoon asking “Why did the fire grew up that much? Wasn't someone supposed to be watching over:” All the animals and man around the consumed ashes of the burning bonfire, saw them with a sad and disappointed look, until the dog said “ weren't you supposed to be the ones watching over night today?”. They both didn't knew what to answer and decided to exile to the deep forest without any companion. When the chaos subsided, everybody thanked the dog because if it wasn't for his notice, something bad could've happened, which is why is said that dog is a man’s  best friend.

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Complexity Vs. Simplicity

Folder: 
Just Thoughts....

Is it as complex as it seems, or is it simple as it should be.

Sitting here disecting every little insignificant detail.

Instead of just looking at it for what it is.

Time is so precious, tomorrow not promise.

Learn to tend to matters of importances.

You don't have to slap me and say it was just a kiss.

It's just as simple as that.

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