Ashes, oh ashes

What were you before?

The flames came a-knocking

And burned down your door!

While dancing and singing

In raptured ascent

Your memories of life

Have all but been spent!

Ashes, oh ashes

And dusty dust

Were you a vehicle

Given to rust?

Perhaps once an instrument

Known well to sing?

Death gave you beauty

Where is it's sting?

Ashes, oh ashes

You've made such a mess!

You're on everything, everywhere

That you could access!

Had I known that you'd make

This place look like snow

I would not have made you

In this chateaux

Ashes, oh ashes

How you do inspire

Myself yet to build

Another fire

Though I hope that this time

You won't land on my face

Or leave your mark

ALL OVER THE PLACE!

Someday, sweet surrender

You'll have me by your means

Will you take me softly?

Will you make me scream?

Someday, sweet surrender

Your laugh will be the last

Upon my deafening ears, linger

I'm falling to your grasp

Someday, sweet surrender

My memories will surface, tenfold

Hushing my mind to silence

A lonely descent into the cold

Someday, sweet surrender

The fireflies will fly, high

Above, below, around me

Ashes dance upon the sky

Sound of Drums

Smoke, ashes, sound of drums.

Smoke, ashes, sound of drums.

Smoke, ashes, sound of drums.

Smoke, ashes, sound of drums.

The day is past.

The dead are dead.

Their lives for naught.

Rebellion, they led.

Their Freedom!,

Never was.

Their Freedom!,

Will never be.

Slaves, chains, sound of drums.

Slaves, chains, sound of drums.

Slaves, chains, sound of drums.

Slaves, chains, sound of drums.

The time is past.

The slaves are slaves.

Their lives ruled by law.

The rebellion, did not last.

Their bravery, their flaw.

Their Freedom!,

Never was.

Their Freedom!,

Will never be.

Smoke, ashes, sound of drums.

Smoke, ashes, sound of drums.

Smoke, ashes, sound of drums.

Smoke, ashes, sound of drums.

The priest performed
a simple solemn service
for the internment
of your ashes.

Your close family
were there
by the graveside;
the small dug hole,
the sacred plot,
the green carpet.

Your sister brought
your wooden casket,
carrying you
for the last time.

Your nephews and nieces
cried as did we all
inside or out.

I guess you were there,
my son, in spirit
looking on, taking in
the whole service
from start to end;
the flowers;
the wooden casket
with your name on top;
watching your brother
place it carefully
in its resting place;
ashes to ashes,
the priest said,
but the soul lives on,
his words meaningful
in the afternoon warmth,
the sun lazily there;
bird song;
you listening,
my son, nearby,
silent as you
usually were,
eyeing the proceedings,
sensing our loss
and ache
at your departure
in a bodily sense;
but you are
here and there
in spirit
as our recompense.

 ■■■■■

And they wanted to heal,

But the requests were riddled 

In disguises,

With delusions of grandeur,

And hopes of great riches and fantasies,

And so the healer likened the journey to the deep sea diver,

Who falls into the water with arms opened wide,

And forges his way to the depths of the ocean,

Deeper, and deeper,

He passes the wreckage of lost ships, and human waste

Of days past,

And at times must close his eyes to the remembrance

Of pain too haunting,

Because he knows the journey to reach his "treasure",

his "core",

Is a merciless path.

■■■■■

And when he reaches the ocean floor, 

He does not stop,

Because he knows what lies beneath is what he must face,

And so he begins to use the tools he learned,

And finally, after chipping away for months and years,

he uncovers

The worth of his soul,

With great joy, he retrieves the lost and precious gems

Of his existence,

And he begins his hopeful journey to the surface,

But his suffering does not end,

Because the road up, 

Even more wrought with turmoil as he endures

The caustic resentment

From those with no knowledge,

And he is made to relive the loss of his soul treasure 

Over and over,

Time and again the relentless visions of pain and torment,

That satiate the hunger of blindfolded eyes and sullen, hopeless spirits,

Hungry for the taste of their own lost piece of life,

Lost in their lust for material gain.

¤

They cannot see his treasure is within,

The lack of "sight" for the divinity of his excavation

Into the "earth" within himself,

A common ignorance of human existence,

To be unaware of what one sees as 

"Separate",

"Derilict",

"Different",

"Ungodly".

And his plight becomes even worse than he could have ever imagined.

■■■■■■

But when he reaches the surface of the water,

This vortex of pure love for all humanity,

Created by and through his own wounds,

Lifts him over the water,

And only then 

He revels in the love meant for him from the beginning.

The hard work that could only be done by him.

No pill,

No man,

Woman,

Dollar amount,

Could have created it.

So you say you would like to heal?

■■■■■■

.....

☆☆☆

In the early morning sun I travel eastward,

My shadow follows every step

And I fear nothing,

The comfort of its presence,

Like the warmth of the sun's rays upon my skin,

It makes no sound except for the echo of my smiles

Seen only in its darkened gloom,

And as the minutes of the daytime draw to dusk 

It begins to hover over my then weary form,

And grows to the heights of which my soul cannot touch,

And the wind brushes my face,

And my hair becomes coarse with the sand of the desert,

Dry and brittle,

Broken leaves dancing feverishly off-beat

To the rumble of doom.

☆

The sun...once lighting my way, 

Now becomes as a thief in the night,

As it burns me with no fire, 

And the shadow so befriended in the day's beginnings,

Swallows me whole under the moonlight, 

And no one hears me cry, or plead for some small shread of hope,

And no mercy knows of my name, and no dream finds me,

The very beating of my heart has been forgotten by any living being,

But my eyes are singed and soon opened wide

Like a shattered pane of glass upon jagged rock

To see my heart upon the dusty earth.

And as the quill dips itself into the well of blood 

That pools at the edges of each pulse,

It writes the word...

☆

      ..."A-S-H-E-S"

☆☆☆

Copyright 2013

...

.....................

The universe holds me,
Gently in it's arms,
Lovingly, with the grace of angels,
Stardust sprinkled upon my tired brow.

The universe holds me.

The universe warms me,
Kindly, with it's luster,
Blankets of billowing clouds,
And whispering winds that feel cool
Upon my heated beads of sweat
Sustained through growing pains
And open wounds.

The universe holds me.

The universe morphs my human frailties
Tenderly, like swirling colors of the rainbows
That shine their golden mist upon the greenest hillsides,
Donning light upon the flowers on its rolling breasts,
Transforming solid ground
To birth the dreams of cherubs' quests.

The universe holds me.

The universe holds me,
In darkest night,
When life has left and all is withered,
Dreams, once shining stars of fire
Now turned to ash by life's demands,
I wake to find the universe,
So devotedly, tucked safely in my hands.

1:02 AM 5/27/2013 ©

Pain scorches my mind

As I peruse the novels

Of my recollections

Every night is identical

Read, reminisce, agony

So I incinerated the library

Of my long kept memories

And their embers seared a hollowness

Into my soul

The ashes of my past

Floating away into the blood-red of the firmament

Or is it of my veins

I can’t say

I can’t remember

I don’t care

The stars sing tenderly to me

Their mournful cry from afar

Helpless to relieve me

Powerless to help

Incapable of aiding

A dying man

A vanished cause

A solitary shadow

I’ve given up the contest

There is no longer a challenge

No longer the next battle

Just eternity at my fingertips

And the doorway in my hand

A slit across the open earth

And I fade into nothingness

Perhaps they will miss me when I’m gone

Funny how they listen

When you can no longer speak

Yet, perhaps they will forget me

I do not know

Another life aborted

Gone into I know not where

Flying free
Away from here
My love branded me
Now nothing to fear
Nothing to lose
Everything's gone
All I have left
Is a new song

Now I'm free to fly
Away from here
No hold over me
Not one tear
My body is burned
By death of passion
Now all alone
Demise my ration
My ashes will fly
On the wings of the breeze
And you'll remember my love
In the whispers of the trees
For though I am free
I'm not leaving, hear?
And the remembrance of me
Will haunt you my dear

This freedom...; is it free?
Or is it just my apathy
Chilling the coals that once burned
Before your ice did make them turn
Now ashes are all thats left of my love
Look down on me good God above!
See the pain that's slit open my veins
See all the tears that are hidden in rains
See how my dreams were dashed on what's real
See how loving of death I now feel
And all the while I can see her grinning
This I know: Death is just the beginning
So again I ask, Is freedom free
Or is it just a wish for me?

Who knew I could make ashes from cinders?
Who knew that Snow could be made of heat?
Who knew that always doesn't mean forever?
Who knew that my loss could make me complete?