S.T. Coleridge succumbed to addiction,

As he found it crucial for the creation,

Opium was said to be opening doors,

For the poet, working as the oars!


He flew like a bird all around,

The fairyland of vision he really found,

He amassed the gems with famished heart,

Got blissful with the gift of the art!


With fresh verve Coleridge flew more and more,


Assuming the trances to end nevermore!

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Love Poems on I make this promise to you I am Yours

To be your lover when you need to be loved,

your doctor when you are ill,

your army when you go to war,

your umbrella when life rains down on you,

your rock when you get weary,

your shield when you need defense,

your spirit when you are drained,

your pillow when you need to rest,

your voice when no one can hear you,

your ear when no one will listen,

your comfort when you feel pain,

your hero when you are under duress,

your sunshine when darkness falls,

your answer when questions arise,

your inspiration to overcome obstacles,

your hand to hold when you are frightened,

your kiss that wakes you everyday,

and your "I love you" each and every night.


I am yours... all of me.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Author Name: Nancy, for more Poems check Poems for her Thanks

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Gone too soon

Too many gone too soon, by way of the needle and spoon......5 friends alone in the month of June and a wake today at noon..........this disease has my life such a mess, felling possessed, hoping for death......Yeah I'm fucking depressed...You must be a genius to have guessed.....alright I will confess I have no control getting high and really don't give a fuck if I overdose and die! I can't admit defeat even living on the streets, no food to eat, no shoes on my feet.....I gave everything away......I really don't know what else to only thought is getting off E today......a little hustling and boosting and I am on my way to see's the same routine every fucking day......when does it end?.....should I listen to my friend and go to detox again?........damn I can't stand being a slave, I know this disease wants me in my grave......I need to have God lead the way......I am ready today!

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My Flame


My Brokenness hurts in new ways in each season of my life
Some more painful to go through than others
Sometimes you're not the only one affected either
His Truth remains the same,
His fire burns; His Flame.
In the rest of His arms my soul seeks,
Yet my sin and body meek, 
To the one who destroys,
and employs destruction,
The magnet to my heart so sweet,
Yet my falls induction. 
A spiral I see but to the Lord He smiles for He knows the blows only brings me closer; His trials
In the hope I see, an end to the trend of my slippery slope,
Yet that end isn't near but I can hear, what is that?
Ah yes, His truth remains the same, His fire burns; his flame. 
The Lord accepts me in my failures, the precepts He gives He tailors, 
For me. 
I see it, but still fail, 
I hit the trail and run. I try and catch up to You but still I stumble, I mumble, I groan, my feet fail me
It's time to give up. I give up. I give up
I trust in You, but still I try to live up, drink from Your cup I try. I try, I try, 
Yet I still die, and why?
Ah yes, don't forget! His truth remains the same. His fire burns; His flame! 
But Lord it hurts, it's painful, I don't like it but I need it. 
I love it, but I hate it. 
It's growing on me now, I see it.
Oh lord how beautiful You are, 
And how I thought you were so far, but no! 
You're right here, You've always been here! 
What's this? You're handing me a mirror so that I can see myself? 
But Lord, let me just gaze upon You,
Let me see you just for another se- wha', where's my filth? 
I'm white as snow.. Wait God, where did you go? I need You! 
[God] " Son, don't be afraid for I am here with you.
 Remember, my Truth remains the same, 
my Holy Fire burns, it is My Flame! 
It destroys you, yet frees you.
Though your feet may fail you,
My love never fails
I took the sin of the world and put it upon my Son as a sacrifice,
The only thing that would suffice
He paid the highest price.
He died and rose again,
Now you are made clean in my sight, 
My love for you, made complete." 
God, I praise you,
I give you my everything 
May my life represent the goodness of your love in my life.
May my lips sing of your praises forever and ever. AMEN! 
Entering this rest....Was this life a test?
A blessing, that will have me forever confessing the goodness of my Lord,
My Savior, my King, my Father, my Sword.
I am His son, for whom He loves and will never be forgotten.
He is here with me.
His Fire burns bright, and His Flame sustains me, from within me. 
Thank you, Lord. 
Author's Notes/Comments: 

I wrote this in the midst of my complete brokenness dealing with a struggle of mine. It shown my struggle of going back and forth and then the way it's written shows the anxiety and distraction i have during it. also, at the end is the hope in which I can gaze upon God freed of my pain and basking in His beauty, changed all throughout because of it. 

The Aftermath

The Love


I'm in his arms and I think of your touch

The one on my leg in the car during rush

Hour traffic goes by, and you're not by my side,

I'm left here begging and pleading the tide

To wash you back to shore, to be forevermore

To be with me in this life once more

But I know moving on is what's expected

I know what we had never resurrected

And this fucking tragedy has me crawling

In ways so cryptic, it's  appalling...

I'm in his arms, and I think of you

He's no lover in the way we loved smooth

Rough and competitive, he leaves me on my toes

When with you, we always knew what each other knows.

And starting over was never in the plan.

Starting over was not supposed to happen.

And what of us?

What are we to do?

I crave you... I still crave you,

You told me goodbye... not see you again soon.

What am I to do?

He can never hold me the way you do. 

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i was never special

i was never special
better never 
never more 
But I wanted to be 
and tried 
But the world is cold 
And calloused over
Its always why I lied 
You can't come in 
where you gonna go 
Everything's been denied. 
My mixed mistakes 
Fault me now 
I Saw myself and cried 
End on high
Now that's a plan
Death until I died
No such luck 
Cross me now
On the other side 

"Pain Don't Hurt"

Just a thought!

"Pain don't hurt!"...

    "Screams of the walking dead, poisoned by pain killers"

Author's Notes/Comments: 

"Just a thought"

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I'm actually starting to feel

After being numb for so long

All these emotions flood in, so real

It's natural but at first it feels so wrong


It won't be easy to travel this path

But now I know I'm not alone

The second I start to feel it won't last

I can reach out and pick up the phone


Meeting people in the same place

Helping each other get through it

Suddenly there's a smile on my face

Because I realize I can do it

Author's Notes/Comments: 

(October 2014) Wrote this in rehab. Such a good feeling. This is still how I feel today. I CAN do it. :)

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Final Release

I've tried to find the strength within

The serenity to know peace

But the strange calm of insanity and sin

Keeps me chasing that sweet release


Getting up, stumbling down and back again

Groping the cold dank walls, blind

This twisted fuck is my only friend

Maybe there's no hope to find


Hands reach out, offering assistance

But to me they come as a threat

None of them understand my resistance

The grip of my hand is one theirs won't get


I've been desperately hoping this is all a delusion

But all my mind's eye seeks

Is my only drawn conclusion:

I need that final, sweet release

Author's Notes/Comments: 

(October 2014) Wrote this while I was having a really hard time in rehab.

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