happy

Righting Wrongs


you're a hundred unfinished poems taking up space under my bed 

 

you're a million pictured memories collecting dust inside my head
 

you're the voice I hear singing in the dead still of the night
 

when everything is wrong, you're the only thing that's right. 

Keeps me warm

Knees so weak-

But full of power.

Glances through and through-

Tears wore out.

He's tall as a tower-

His grasp pulls me through.

Through, this hurricane.

 

Crashing waves would pull me under-

But his love gives me strength.

Maybe I should run,

Run for cover.

But his palms keep me safe.

Through, this hurt and pain.

 

I might be lost in this fire-

But I feel peace and warmth.

One deep breath-

Oceans sweep and swept.

Alone, but not alone.

Through, this hurricane.

 

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Even on the brightest day.

Even on the brightest days, I feel as if I'm trapped inside the darkness.

I try to open my lips to speak, but no sound will come out.
My voice falls on deaf ears, my tears go un seen.
Why is it nobody can look past my shields and see?
 
My shields and gates are locked up tight, and built so very high.
So nobody can get inside and hurt my heart and make me cry.
So easily it has been for intruders to force their way in over the years.
I just wish somebody could look at me, without me speaking a word,
Would be able to look into my tear stained eyes, and see why it is, I cry.
 
Sometimes I find it hard to verbalize why I am upset.
I can't seem to make them understand why my heart feels so dead.
I lay upon the cold floor, crying till all you hear is screams.
Screams from a women in such pain, it makes your heart shatter and break.
But yet they don't understand, and try to be selfish and get their ways.
Instead of trying to hold me, and take it all away.
 
Even on the brightest days, I feel as if I'm trapped inside the darkness.
 
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One day

This is how the story goes.

A lonely boy, trapped in his self-consciousness, aggravated by others

Meets a girl, a girl trapped in her self-consciousness, their minds connect at once

They go through the good, the bad, the beautiful, the ugly

They go behind authority just to see each other's faces

To keep that horror of self-consciousness away

But one day, that girl goes too far

One day she thinks she can have it all

One day she doesn't tell him about her feelings for him

And that's when the story truly begins   

 

The boy and girl talk, they work it out, they think it'll all be fine

He starts to notice her changing, changing in ways he thought he'd never see

He thinks its just a phase

He thinks "everyone goes through these phases, she's just going through one"

 

She doesn't stop.

 

He starts to adapt to her, starts to forget how she used to be

Starts to forget the girl that he fell for in the beginning of the story

Starts to pay the price

 

"Every relationship has their ups and downs"

Yes but that relationship wasn't a rollercoaster

It was a free fall, a free fall that doesn't stop when it hits the ground

But somehow goes further and further down into the dark abyss of the unknown world

The boy, that stupid naive boy is blinded, scared that everything will come back

But he doesn't think that he wants everything to come back

He doesn't think that that self-consciousness is worse now then it ever was

When did he hear those words that would light his face up

When did she give him everything he wanted

When did she give him everything he needed

 

One day reality comes in

The day that has been needing to come, but has been dreaded

That girl does it for the last time

That boy still hiding behind his fears of being alone

 

It ends

It ends for them but not for him

She goes off to accomplish new things and to create this very story for more people

He doesn't go off, he falls back into darkness of his own demons

Getting pulled further and further back every time a glimpse of hope enters that dull head

Not knowing where he is headed

He tries fighting for his freedom

Tries to run back towards the light

But what he doesn't know is he's running backwards

The light is out of reach from him

Burying himself deeper in the ashes of his life's destruction

He fights, he wants to be a phoenix but instead he's a deer in headlights

Not knowing where he's going

Not knowing where he needs to go

Instead of finding all that out he sits and lets everything take control of his body

But what he needs to be doing is standing up for himself

He needs to crawl out of the darkness to be exposed to the beauty of the world

He pushes the demons away

Pushing them further and further

Pulling him closer and closer

He reaches it

He sees it

He believes it

 

And the story end

The story ends for that little self-conscious boy

But another story begins for a man that has seen everything

A new beginning

A good beginning.

 

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Seeds of laughter

The little blue flowers, you seem so big.

 

I have watched them from seed, to something less impressive.

 

I, with love, with water. with my sun, they grow from this.

 

We are something, we can teach others to fish.

 

The sea is empty, the catch is just not there.

 

I have lost it. So, the sea is not fair.

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Rainbow Unicorn History

A long time ago

When all the land was snow

Did rule the Unicorns

But then came the Inferno

They rose from the depths of the Earth

Like searing ashes from a fiery hearth

They burned across the land

Wiping out the territory of the Unicorns

And they were outraged and so War began

Magic and fire flew all around

But both armies stood firm to the ground

And so it was clear

There had to be peace

So the land was divided

Inferno got the West 

Rainbow got the East

And peace still remains

So on.. and so forth

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What is Love?

if asked to explain the definition of love

I wouldn't know what to say. 

Maybe love is a deep affection,

maybe it's a romantic attachment, 

maybe it's butterflies,

maybe it's  fireworks, 

or maybe, 

just maybe, 

love is the way I feel when I'm with you. 

maybe 

love

is you.  

Sometimes

Sometimes when I look at you

A total happiness fills me through

And I smile, or laugh, and you do too. 

 

Sometimes when I look at you

I get disappointed and feel like poo

And I want to change me and be someone new. 

 

Sometimes when I talk to you

I feel I learn so much, I don't know what to do!

And I ponder what you told me, trying to get a clue.

 

Sometimes when I talk to you

A silence takes over and makes things blue

And I start to feel like I'm losing you. 

 

Sometimes when I sit next to you

I get these butterflies, it's true!

And I hope that you can feel them too. 

 

Sometimes when I sit next to you

You run away like I have the flu

And it always leaves me feeling like I do. 

 

Sometimes when I touch you

My bones start melting and I turn to goo

And I want to melt together and be one with you. 

 

Sometimes when I touch you

You jerk away like I have the plague too!

And I look at myself, "What is wrong with you?"

 

Sometimes when I dream of you

I wake the next day feeling renewed

And I try to recall what it is we do. 

 

Sometimes when I dream of you

I wake the next day alone and confused

And I keep my eyes closed, looking for you. 

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Lists...

1. The way you quote your favorite shows

2. The way you sing under your breath

3. The way you roll your eyes at me

4. The way you look when you wear your glasses

5. The way you smell

6. The way you think you're always right

7. The way you're right most of the time, even when I don't want to admit it. 

8. The way your eyes scrunch up when you laugh

9. The way you make lists for everything 

10. The shape of your nose

11. The way you argue against me, even when I agree with you

12. The way you don't laugh at any of my jokes

13. The way you say shoes

14. The way you try to hold back your smile when I say something stupid

15. The way you dance

16. The way you make me happy every time I talk to you

17. The way I want to make you happy, whenever you're hurt

18. The way you're the only one I want to talk to…ever

19. The way I can't get you out of my head

20. The way everything I do, reminds me of you. 

21. The way I fall for you more and more each day.