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You can be my kryptonite

You can bring my downfall

Bring me to my knees

Pull the energy out of me

You can be the fire

That finally consumes me

Weakness or ecstasy

You could be my kryptonite

Falsehoods and lies

Truth in disguise

Whispers comprise

A doubt in my heart

Blinding my eyes

Sorrow and sighs

Darkness will rise

My world falls apart

It's not you,

It's not me,

It's not him

It's the world that has been

sucking us back in

to the dark void it's yet to fill

devouring our rainbows and

any shade and trace of light

and everything we hold dear

It's not you

It's not me

It might be

the words of a madman that

have devoured me piece by piece

ever since

until I suffocate and dissolve

into the nothingness I feel

at 3 a.m.

And I'm sorry if you knew this only now.

It's not you

It's not him

It's the constant fear

that has built a home

out of the shanties of my heart

Pulling the strings,

the triggers

on its whim

And I'm sorry but it's already won the war, I believe

It's not you

It's not me

It's not him

It's the inevitability I cannot escape

And so in silence, I shall

roam this world and carry

the memories of us,

your buzzcut and my smile,

and the glow I basked on with

in that April afternoon.

Forget about me.

On a trip, to a museum I was.
There a statue, made of grey stone I saw.
Statue of a little boy.
In his hands holding a jar.
Filled with fireflies, was that jar.
And at it, he was looking.
I looked into his eyes, which were telling me something.
In his eyes were some dream.
They told me that, he wants to walk.
The boy made of grey stone.
He lives in museum, standing alone.
And loneliness, makes him cry.
And no one hear his any moan.
He wants to go out, and enjoy the open air.
And birds sitting on trees he wants to stare.
And look at roses, and in winter, girly red noses.
And a friend, to them, everything to share.
And catch fireflies himself.
And put them in the jar.
And he wishes that he had a home with a shelf.
To put that jar on.
And sleep when he's tired of standing.
But he wishes what is against the nature.
Because he is just a stone made creature. 

Your hugs heal my breaking heart

Only temporarily, for once I see you hug another

It once again tears apart

I question my warm feelings…

We’re only friends, yet you fascinate me

To the point that I wonder if that’s all we really are.

I cherish our laughter, our quirky remarks

But do you lavish the intrepid beauty of others instead?

Am I nothing, if not the awkward girl you laugh with, when they’re gone…?

But then, am I more special than they?

More than a face, two breasts, and hips?

More than a quick pleasure in-between your sheets?

Or is that all you truly cherish…?

Every day that goes by

I see myself bigger in my eye

But when I look at yours I know I'm living a lie

You pretty boy I want to call mine

You change my point of view on anything and everything

You even make me feel the impossible

Like I'm flying with my broken wings

You pretty boy I want to call mine

You make me feel special when you look into my eye

?How much longer do I have to wait

?To make a move before it's too late

You pretty boy I want to call mine

I drown in your ocean blue eyes 

And I dream about your red lips, they look so fine

?How many girls have drooled over you

?And how many have held your hands

You pretty boy I want to call mine

Your smile makes my body whine

It brings warmth to my heart

And dirty thoughts to my mind

You make my heart stop

And my body to tingle with flames

You pretty boy I want to call mine

Even when my body is not awake

You find a way to enter my dreams

And all I see is you and me on a date beside the lake

Even when I'm taking an exam

Your name comes acroos my brain several times

You pretty boy I want to call mine

Every time I say I'm over you, you show me it's not yet

And reveal to me an amazing side of yours I haven’t met

Your care freeness and your freeness I envy and love

How you can enjoy and care less about the mess

Everything about you I want, even in your worse

Together I'm sure we can open new doors

You pretty boy I want to call mine

My desperation is getting out of line

 But your dreamy eyes tells me its fine

In my head I'm yours and you are mine

But when reality struck 

I know I have no luck   

Summer 2000 
Trisha M. Barrek Hopkins

Wow! A bundle of joy 
Great times 
Gorgeous smiles 
You're having a baby boy 

Give the kid hugs and kisses 
Have a great time with your baby 
Soon he'll find a misses 

So share this time to talk 
To share secretes with 
Take pictures 
Because soon he'll be crawling 
Soon that'll be a myth 
Bacause soon he'll be walking 
Memories are forever 
You'll never want them to end 

A baby boy 
What are you going to name him 
Once he hits one 
He'll have lots of toys 

He will have temper tantrums 
Yes your little sweet boy 
So remember to pamper him 

Soon he'll be a big boy 
He wont be your little one 
Make sure you take him to the shore 
One day soon he'll come home with a lady 

Give him all the love 
Don't worry he'll always want more 
You're his one and only mom 
You're the one he'll adore 

A baby boy 
Thats great news 
Make sure you make a shelf 
For all his shoes 

Have fun.... 
With all the crazy times 
Because with your baby boy 
Joy will never be done 
He'll look like you 
That's not a false statement 
It'll be true 
You watch 
When he is born 
You two will be a perfect match 

Copyright* 

Judy was in the store
and I found her at the back
filling shelves
and I said

how's it going?
and she said
O so so
not like it was

at school
there
you could have a laugh
here everyone is

O got to keep
the customers happy
got to keep them
coming back

she placed the last
of the tins
on the shelf
and paused

you still get
to sit by our lake?
she said
now and then

I said
not as often
as we did
but I have to work

now too
and time gets eaten up
by the work time
you remember that time

we sneaked there
after school
and it was summer evening
and we sat there

watching the sun go down
through the trees
like a departing actor
after a big scene?

she said
sure I do
I said
and the shadows of birds

going off to sleep
and bats
she said
O how I hated

those things
beginning to flap
about over head
and that time

you kissed my neck
so unexpectedly
that I screamed
and it echoed right

through the woods
like I was being murdered
she smiled
and looked around the store

don’t have a laugh any more
it's all so serious here
the staff
the customers

just wish
it was as it was
maybe we
should meet up again

one evening
by the lake
and see the sunset
as we once did

I said
the store manager
came by
and said something to her

and she picked up
some other tins
and began filling
another self

what's he say?
I asked
the bum said
I wasn't

to waste company time
in idle chitchat
anyway
she said

I'd like to get
to the lake one evening
as we used to
maybe Thursday evening

I looked at her hands
holding the tins
how I once held them
and kissed the fingers

one by one
sure
I said
that will be good

we agreed a time and date
and I left her there
giving the manager
a cool eyed stare.

Lizbeth insisted
on us going
to the small church again

we walked
as she had parked
her bike
by the shed door
at the back
of the cottage

it seems longer
when you walk it
she said

same length
different speed
I said

she'd put on
her short black dress
for some reason
not fitting
for this kind
of countryside
her shoes had mud
on them already
where a tractor
had deposited it
all along
the narrow road

don't you have
buses here?
she asked

once a week
I said
Saturdays
2 hours
to do your shopping
in town
then back

2 hours?
she said
I need longer
than that to shop

that's all there is
I said

I hate the countryside
she said
the smell
the quiet
the emptiness
the silly blue sky
and those puffy
white clouds
she seemed annoyed
Benny
how do you stick it?

it's ok
I like it
it has a sense
of peace here
and there are birds
to study and butterflies

O my god
Lizbeth said
I’d die
of boredom here
you'd find me stiff
in some corn field
or whatever shit
grows in these fields

we walked on
in a uneasy silence
for a while

what's she like?
Lizbeth said

who?
I asked

that girl
who lives near you
the girl with
the long straight black hair
and a face like a virgin

I knew who she meant
but I said nothing
but pretended
not to know
she lives near me?
I said

yes
well she gets on
your school van
in the mornings
and afternoons
always dresses
like she's going
to a funeral
I see her
in the girl's playground
little Miss No Mates

O you mean Jane
I said
she's good
we have long walks together
and she knows a lot
about nature and birds
and butterflies and beetles
and so on

you walk with her?
Lizbeth said

sure
we often go for walks
when its fine and warm

what do you do?
is she up for it?

up for what?

you know
sex?
Lizbeth spat out
the last word
as if
it were too hot
for her tongue

we don't think
about that
kind of thing
I said

Lizbeth looked at me
with raised eyebrows
thought not
she said

we walked up
the narrow lane
to the church
sunlight warming
our heads and backs

if the church is empty
maybe we can
she said

can what?
I said

you know
have S E X

I looked
at the church
appearing above
the hedgerow
and hoped to God
someone was there
some visitor
or vicar
or anyone
to save my day
and stop her fun.