PostPoems Be Artistic. Be Creative. Be Inspired!

I kinda got my inspiration from a Christmas song I had stuck in my head, and the words just flowed out, so now I have a "winter" or "Christmas song" under my belt. 

See if you can guess what song it was...

12-20-22

Yes, it's early, but I was thinking of frost and it popped into my mind in a flash. 

i hate the cold, sorry

"Normally I'm all about the sensory imagery and using a wide vocabulary, and I know that poetry tends to be much more elaborate than prose, but I feel like the emotions and symbolism you are trying to convey are being lost behind all the extra words you're squeezing in. A lot of the words you've chosen come across as either redundant or misplaced, and that gets a little distracting for your reader(s). As you keep working on this piece, consider whether some of your word choices could be pared back, simplified, or eliminated all together. That will help emphasize the meanings you are trying to express.
Also take some time to consider the purpose of your punctuation. I know that ellipses seem like a nice, dramatic way to emphasize specific phrases and images, but overusing them in this way makes the reader feel like they're constantly trying to catch their breath. Which, hey, could be the very point! Just a thought I had." - C.J. Holmes

72 days into eternity

Just a poem I thought up earlier. Winter is coming!