Imprisoned Feelings

I've always kept my feelings inside, each one in time was left alone or left behind.

I've always been afraid of an honest feeling ever getting close to being the real thing. Like a lie propped up like a present with a bow and tie only being a promise on the outside.

I've always kept my feelings inside, and pent up fire becomes imprisoned ice, the hotter the flame, the colder the eyes.

I don't know when feelings are supposed to show, I've got someone who loves me. Asking me to let them go. I swear I'm not masking them but the last thing I'd know would be how to let passion in.

As a son to a drunkard father, I never want to touch a bottle. I'm not going to get into all the things he beat on, but I'm calmer.

As a son to a ever distancing mother. My girl asks me why I don't desperately act like we need each other. Affection is not something new to me, on the contrary it was my very first enemy.

Something in me just always screamed get out, climb, and never trust a feeling. Life since has been more then exceptionally good to me, but looking back 35 years on the life I've lived, I realize that I've kept my feelings inside just like that little kid


Author's Notes/Comments: 

I've always found emotions to be self defeating, through life I've either conscientiously or subconsciously tried to reprehend them. This is how I can best explain it through poetry and a small portion of how it's been what you could argue as detramental to my life or maybe it was a defence that kept the world out for the better.

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Spreading Blasphemy
They've made a world of sin
Creating secured limitations
Guiding disposable sheep
Exploiting their pain, denying their pleasure of reaping
Freedom containing within a mortal shell
Higher powers spreading a living hell
Your existence feels scorned
Uncleansed, despising this way of life
No longer intact, peace ad tranquility dissolves
Infecting the good-hearted nature inside
A strangle hold to release are way
As hatred becomes concrete
Fearful of horrid hypotheticals
Uncertainties of the future
Wanting to rise from nothingness
To embrace the gift of life
The inner sight of possible visions
Wanting to lay down in a meadow heaven
Not a prisoner of a dirty system
Breaking from the infliction

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Heartbeat Part 3

Verse 1:
Come away with me tonight.

This heart beats so alone

Without its better half.

Babe, you're my heartbeat.



All the rhythms lead

And point to you.

Can you run into my arms?

'Cause you're worth the fight.


Verse 2:

I'd do anything for us.

It's worth the aches and pain.

There's no price for what

I'd go through for you.



 This heart beats so alone

Without its better half.

Perhaps, now, would you return to my side?

'Cause you are my life's memory: my heartbeat.


Was it a sin to love you?

'Cause you're my posion.

This heart beats so alone

Without its better half.

For, you are my heartbeat. 

Author's Notes/Comments: 

"Heartbeat Part 3" inspired by the Ariana Grande song: "All My Love" which a guy friend dedicated to me. I don't love my guy friend in that way though so I ended up breaking his heart...

Another Night Alone

Verse 1:
I won't spend another night alone.

If it's not you no one else can do.

'Cause we belong together,

You're my shooting star.



 All this time, I spent with you:
These memories will never die out.

'Cause I know you by heart,

Wherever you will go, I'll follow you.


 Verse 2:

Now, the time has come for me

To put myself into your hands.

'Cause you gotta know: We belong to each other.

Our hearts are continuously set in the afterglow.



If you and me, if there's a possibility

Of beconing one with you,

Let loose and come unto me tonight.

Fall apart or hold on tight.



Every time the phone rings,

I expect it to be you.

I spend each daily liviing like this.

Won't you take me home tonight?


Author's Notes/Comments: 

Songs that inspired me to write this song:
1) "Stand by U" - Tohoshinki

2) "The Best Mistake I've Ever Made" - Joanna Wang

3) "Take Me Home" - Oceanlane

4) "I Won't Spend Another Night Alone" - The Ataris 

Memories of You

Verse 1:
The light flickers on and on.

Memories of you are still

Here with me.

Where are you now?



I trusted you.

I loved you.

I gave you all of me

Yet you threw it all away.


Verse 2:

Are you doing what makes you happy?

Who are you with?

What dreams are you dreaming

Even now, I am still here.



I still believe that we will see each other again.

I should have held your hand when you were still mine.

I'll stand by you

Until the day I die.



'Cause I still love you,

I can't help missing you.

Now that you're gone,

It's you I want, all of you.


Author's Notes/Comments: 

This song is dedicated to my ex/first love. I may never truly and fully get over him. A part of me will always love him no matter what.


Songs that inspired me to write this song:
1) "Can't Help Missing You" - Hwan Hee

2) "Stand by U" - Tohoshinki

3) "I Love You" - Joanna Wang

4) "Fiction" - Beast