To Fix What’s Broken
When were born our mothers smile light’s her face a glow
She say’s were perfect from our head down to our toes
But as we grow thing’s change and to much is left unspoken
Oh to be able to go back in time and fix what’s broken
But if it was that easy then there wouldn’t be any pain
No sorrow, no fear, of what lies ahead and nothing to gain
So here we are slightly wrinkled, and our hearts a cold dark place
try as hard as we can to iron it out, and thaw what’s been frozen
we try again and again to mend ourselves to fix what’s broken
but night after night we fall into bed to tired to keep up the pace
knowing full well that tomorrow our step’s we’ll have to retrace
someday I think to myself I wont feel so much pain no more emotion
and with no pain there will not be a need to go and fix what’s broken
I woke up,
in the mirror I had my closeup.
There was a hole in my throat,
fastly I slipped into my coat.
I went to the hospital,
I was worried I recall.
I gave the fault to Abra,
who was able to the macabre.
Dramatic tunes play in my mind
as I wait in bed for your replies
Took a trip, tried to listen to
A Brief Inquiry Into Online Relationships
But boy, I really should take note
that 1975 was never the year
that the internet was born
then lives got weird
Dramatic tunes swirl in my mind
Nauseating and mesmerizing, all at once
I trace all the pieces I could find
to draw the image that may resemble you
and draft the letters I could think of
but never would I send to you
Dramatic tunes leech on my mind
Trying to design my last demise
The nothingness on their side,
churning violence all coincide
Dramatic tunes play in my mind
As I wait for your replies
The darkness would soon arrive
here and hear my last goodbye
The flock of crows are closing in
Floating just three feet above
But then I feel my eyes flinch
As the phone buzzed
No, not diamonds, emeralds are much more fitting.
Emeralds dancing under an endless blaze,
Sparkling in the light while shining in the shadows.
A complex ballet of both strength and love.
…and pain.
Sorrow and Distraught. Anguish drawn from years of
Frustration. Get the lights, lock the door.
Observe, partake, change, leave.
Be it the pain, strength, or loneliness,
Eyes worth millions tell stories in silence.
As long as there are stars to see at night
There will be problems for us outside
And there's nothing to grant you a better life
Just the expectancy of something worse
Only to be surprised with something
Probably as good as it was in the beginning
And that's how life rolls
How Earth's still turns
And how dark takes over the sun
How the stars shine along
in what dark recesses of torture remain
exists a dreaded seed for us to obtain
to keep us sane and deliver us from evil
so goes the creed of an everlasting people
unending doubt resonates to be
impermanance rooted in an everlasting dream
scarcity of hope glimmering in dusk
prevention of fortune in a world of luck
forever told from stories past
eerily reminiscent of perpetual task
systems of new destroyed wisdom once known
for all apart of a world unsown
grimmace and malice plagued once more
in dire times that conjured vile scorn
but it was hope that was given once last chance
now grows a tree from the seed of our past
It’s happening again,
Such unbearable pain,
And if my soul is crying
As my heart is breaking, then that’s fine…
I’ve let so many people down,
Lost so many beautiful opportunities,
I feel so failed and forlorn,
But is that really such a tragedy?
Perhaps, rather,
It’s a positive thing,
Shouldn’t a true artist be suffering?
At least I’m feeling something…
It’s happening again,
Such unbearable pain,
And if my soul is crying
As my heart is breaking, then that’s fine…
I remember the time,
When the world was much simpler,
As little kids we had it all setup for us,
Now see see the world in its true face now,
How it all changed with a few years going by,
I wish I still had the chances I had 5 years ago,
But now I take the chances today give,
Hoping I make the right call,
That I don't regret in 5 year,
Choices I can sit my kids down too,
Say this is what I've done,
Worring will I get disowned by my son,
Or hear Dad, that's so cool,
I want to be just like you,
But life is so fast how can I keep up,
It feels like I'm drowning someone,
I need help someone save me,
By the time I know my fate,
I will already know,
If I made it or if I'm a failure,
Did I let the river run,
Or did I take control,
And stear my own destiny,
To my own goals,
To my own end,
We thought it was LOVE
When we busted the facade
I learn it was lusted affair
I only wanted to win your affection
Yet you pin me as imperfection
I rush the the threshold, pausing at the gate
Heart rate pounding, your hate rising
This angry tide consuming, pushing me further
I want off this insane ride of yours
Our luck is fucked
I look down at my phone, silent now
The shattered screen, like my busted heart
All bucked up, cracked
You did a number on me
Your mean love made my spirit lean
Cleaning you out of me
Rattle my beans
As I battle the poison
You breed in me
The greed of your kisses
I piss myself when you hit me
Now I hiss your name in vain
I wouldn't play your game
So now I drop my cape
Tape my busted heart
Heal best as I can
Peel off the exhaustion
I cannot rest
My chest constricting
Anxiety at head lights behind me
I asked for kindness, not blindness
Rightfully, that would be love
What was our marriage
What was our dream
I scream at the greyness
Smashing the madness
The badness, ripping your hooks out
Now I look at my cracked screen
Reminding myself what is left of my heart