....::::Where is my Rainbow::::....

....::::Where is my Rainbow::::....

The rainbow only appears after the storm...
The heavy weight of the rain only brings tears and forces me to mourn
The storm was a struggle this I know...
Thru all the dark times its hard to see just how much I HAD to grow
into a person with phenomenal standards

But is that the person I really want to BE ?
Is that the actual chapter I want you to read ?
I like to stand for something, so when you look at me this is what you will PERCIEVE..

A woman who begin the battle, faught the fight , and END the war..
who held LIFE in hand ..
as she stood there and just.... STAND
The warmth of the SUN coming IN..
as it bounced off his UNDEVELOPED SKIN...

Where is my rainbow as I cry within ?
As I held him close .. I looked up and realize the WAR had just BEGUN !

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Hola, This poem was written when I was in a very DARK place in life. We had just planned the birth of my AMAZING son and was expecting him to be born in Oct. However after 14 hrs of labor and 5 months pregnant we gave BIRTH to an ANGEL *Prince Collin*. I often visit forms where mommies and daddies were so EXCITED to get there RAINBOW baby. I didnt know what it was.. In my poem when I say.. Is this the person I want to be ? I am refering to ME being able to identify with parents that have a rainbow baby. I'd much rather have a BABY with out having the rainbow. ONLY soley because the rainbow... means.. the LOST of a child and the NEW birth of a child after the lost which is ** the Rainbow ** But.. TODAY I am smiling I am happy to say.... I have RECIEVED my rainbow he is now 2 and I wouldnt change ANYTHING ! I love him with my WHOLE heart :-)

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Born with death holding your hand

A child born a victim of aids his life number by days.
He was born with the reaper holding his hand.
There is nothing but pain and darkness ahead for a short life.
No mother to hold him or sing him a lullaby.
No father to protect him from the bogyman at night.
This short taste of life is no more than bitter sweet.
I'm now looking into your eyes seeing you taking your last breath.
Doing all I can so you don't go just yet.
The only one to prove you were here in this world if only for a short time.
Why do I come to a stranger bed side just to watch and hold your hand until you die.
Here you lay in my arms, another abandon child thrown out in the wild.
Why have I decided to come and hold your hand?
What was I seeking in this journey?
Maybe faith and God, but with the suffering I've seen I’m not sure what I have found.
Now my little friend it is time for you to finally rest; I whisper as I watch you take your last breath.

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Bastion's Lullaby

Oh Bastion, oh mine,
rueful and pink;
cleansed by the way folk
above Den Retreat.
They coddled your larder
and sank you in sod;
made you all rotten
by way of facade.
You smelled of the passing,
you looked badly burned
but I had no reason
to divulge what I'd learned.
You weren't mine for keeping,
you weren't mine at all;
you came from another
who's long seen the road.
Your matted gold hair locks
all caking with clod,
and each cheek so skinny,
so thinning and not.
I fear the dark too,
just as you'd cry.
I couldn't protect us,
I couldn't provide.
Bastion my only,
Bless me, forget
that I once existed
and let loose your hand.
Bastion my darling,
I'm finding my road.
Sleep for a while.
Sleep and you'll dream.



My words blow peoples minds like terroristical bombs ; colliding with one another like polyistical bonds ; & totally out of ur knowledge like stereotypical blondes ; be calms i wont fucks withs ur minds especially if u from idaho ; even if ur a dime ; cuz i only pay mind to the beauty that's in ur soul ; & if we had a bigger scale then u would be able to tell ; that my ever lasting love would weight ur heart down baby girl ; & ah growing up I was never a child at ease ; i mean back then getting love from ur parents must of been a disease ; like fuck ; the only time i heard the words i love u is when i got my degree ; made me feel like i was abandoned by life so you would think I had no love for the world ; but through music I found another earth hidden deep with in itself ; yea it embodied my genes ; chameleon amoeba cells ; unlocking the potential that was shy to even show ; & now I'm aligned with in my axis ; no more vertigo ; with the path clear in thought I know exactly where to go ; & dnt worry I'll make sure the public surely knows ; through my music u'll be sure to hear my one menifesto .

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Daughter of Mine

Dedicated to Alexis & Ariana Bragg

And parents
pass down from themselves
their traits
Pieces of themselves
unto their children
and their children
share a resemblance
to those who created them
Do you have my eyes?
Do you have my nose?
My hair, my ears
my height, my lips?
But you do have
a piece of me
In more ways
than one
you have my heart
dear daughter of mine
Fill it with love
With compassion
With forgiveness
Open it up to the world
Let them embrace you
for exactly who you are
Be strong,
but not invincible
Be careful,
but not afraid
Be brave,
but not negligent
Scream when you have to
Cry when you need to
Fall to pieces
when you feel
There's nothing
left to do
But be sure
to pick yourself up
and look into
the mirror
Breathe deeply
Find yourself again
Remember that
You are free
You are strong
You are beautiful
And most of all...

You are loved

dear daughter of mine

Feb 19 / 201

Author's Notes/Comments: 

This is a poem for two amazing twin girls!

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 Sweet child, play hideous of innocence, no care in the world,

Can’t you see the shadow walking near, forget mum, she is too busy…



Come near me, listen to the music of the river.

Hypnotic sound, silver notes, mum is looking away…

Little angel laughing, the sun is so bright.



Look at the water, mirror of nature, reflecting your tender face,

Let me taste your skin!

Soon you will be mine…



Mum keep dreaming, silly happiness filling your motherhood heart,

Thinking of the future, so close to the abyss…



Few inches; let me dress you with the coldness of my being, slowly breathing the shallow water, what a delight…



Was that a scream? Little angel floating away,

Your eyes fill with tears,

Fishy kisses……….goodbye!





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Sweet breath stroke my face,

Bitter wind, the back of mother hand!

Such is life, brutally alive

Children’s minds…


The void of the blind man,

Remind me of this love…

A Street name carnage desire,

As I watch my shaddow slip away….


Back alleys ways fills with zombies.

Feeding on each others carcasses!

Rotten dreams for mortals!

Puppets of destiny, dangling from the hollow true!


May I hold the strings?

To cut free, and watch crashing,

Such pretty creatures, to falls,

Over the gutter, that is my life!!!




Author's Notes/Comments: 

a deserve slap never hurt anyones

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   Come to my garden,

Let me show you the way…

Walk into my footsteps,

Like the shadow I am! 


The day is fading away.

Can you smell the perfume of ether…?

Exotic flowers rotten to the core,

Each one with a bleeding heart! 


Feel the thorn of the dying rose,

Getting each night,

Deeper unto your flesh,

Another fading passion!


Moon reflecting on white lilies,

Feeding on my tears…

My flesh turning into ashes,

The earth fed with the salt of my being. 


Can you see the flashing colours?

Blinding your innocent eyes…

Your feet’s slowly going into the ground,

Buried into the garden of my perverted mind! 


My perversion of today,

My innocence of tomorrow!

My garden is eternity,

Filled with corpses of memories…. 



Author's Notes/Comments: 

Oh mighty, just bump unto some real old dusty words. what is it, me and garden?
actually, i love, plNTS AND GARDENING, MUST BE THAT....

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Treasures from Heaven

Just a thought!

Treasures from Heaven

She paints from the heart, loves with her eyes
Creations of color, or lines made of cries
An ocean of moonlight, ships resting on seas
A loft in the forest, fields swept by a breeze.
She captures the sound of a waterfalls mist
Or the Sun’s beating rays, with a stroke of the wrist
There is innocent depth in a sensual stare
Or a child’s warm embrace, nestled close in mother’s care.
The face of an Angel, drawn in mystical haze
Caresses our heart, in such magical ways
Signed works leave us breathless, so touched by a view…
What beautiful dreams, we have seen within you!
                          by Barry Anderson

Author's Notes/Comments: 

"Written for the beauty captured in artwork"

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