i'm going to climb to the highest mountain and catch a ride on a shooting star.
i'm going to to ride it until it falls, until it falls.
i'll ride this high until i crash and burn.
up i go with no safety net; no hopes or dreams to catch.
i'll never accept i can't shine.
bring me a peice of the sun.
close out this darkness.
hold back your criticism.
i don't need an activist.
i won't reject you if you'll just let me go.
i lost it back there.
i keep climbing stairs to nowhere.
my heart is smoking a special blend of fears.
the devil told me God didn't want me, but yesterday an angel smiled at me.
somewhere between my destruction and my salvation has got what i need to know.
buy me a teflon soul.
let my nervous system reboot.
i didn't need a preacher.
opinions are freely given, but cost me all i hold dear.
i'm dancing across our history.
i feel like newly fallen snow my dog just shit on.
you never could let me slide.
you have to tighten every screw in my mind.
i can't forget the seeds you sow.
my mind reeks of your touch.
all your sick ideas continue to grow.
i got weed whacker in a shot glass.
i'll cure this affliction.
i'll down the poison until it kills your memory in my reflection.
i say crazy things and i mean them.
i deal in quantum madness.
mulitply me by my sadness.
the blackhole i've swallowed is turning me into you.
God forbid if there are two!
I Feel So Stupid
Dear Sweetheart.
I am so sorry that I never told you what I wanted to tell you before I left.
I Feel So Stupid, That I never talked you about it, none of it was about neglect
If only I can show you that I’m still the same like a mirror so that I may Reflect
On the things I should have done with you, but the past is the past.
I wish everyday that I could’ve changed it but Damn time goes by fast!
I never forgot anything about you, which is strange
And I’m still trying not to set my mind into derange
I looked back at everything I did when I talked to you and…
Just like that… you slipped right out of my hand
I tried to catch you, but I guess I never tried hard enough
When I found out that I wasn’t the only one I never knew it would be so tough
I Feel So Stupid, trying to speak out to the people, but how am I to speak with gruff
What else can I do? To Resolve this? Or better yet to solve this?
I’ve been through it all, but you’re the only memory that I truly miss.
My Heart burns, cracks, weeps, shakes, crumbles, crushes, and worse off all breaks
So far last year, you were the only one that wasn’t one of the those fakes
But who am I to judge you? I barely know you but it seems that I’ve known you forever
What the hell am I saying? God I Feel So Stupid, why can’t I say never?
No! not this time, I’ve been running all my life no more will I pass the ones that mattered
Everyday you’re on my mind but with the shit that’s happening to me is why we scattered
I miss you and I regret not telling what I wanted to tell you when school ended
You are everything that I ever wanted, I never told you that I’ve always tended
About you, and all that I was trying to tell you for more a year was that I liked you
I Feel So Stupid
Its funny how the world works.
As a child you can be anything you want, just say the words.
He would put half the effort in but some how would go twice as far.
That little boy shows so much promise, but society locks him in a jar.
Screams of an aching heart are in the air.
His dreams led to so much more than whats been there.
Save him....... Someone save him.
The quicksand was unforgiving and continued to pull down.
Harsh words invoke tears when he was the king who deserved the crown.
He's the one....... Save him.
He sits and waits patiently to show his true colors, oh boy what his love could do.
As the years pass, no arms open up to show that the rumors were true.
His spirit is depleted, and he has forgotten what its like to feel joy.
That old man has forgotten how to be that little boy.
To follow his dreams and let that rocket deploy.
Screams of an aching heart are in the air.
His dreams led to so much more than whats been there.
Save him....... Someone save him.
The quicksand was unforgiving and continued to pull down.
Harsh words invoke tears when he was the king who deserved the crown.
He's the one....... Save him.
What could have he done?
Where could have he been?
Instead of sitting in a cell asking for his phone call, praying God will take away his sins.
With each tear begging for death so he doesn't have experience another moment of "what if?"
Knowing he could have done so much more with his life instead of being in the slammer or a working stiff.
He wanted a son, he wanted a wife.
He wants to know he changed someone for the better before he ends his life.
Save him.....Some one help him.
I came home to my small town
and wandered 'round, both up and down
streets known so well, but had not seen
since I was a boy, scrawny and lean,
my baseball cap a soiled crown.
How can some places known so well,
seem yet unkown, I ask, pray tell,
to that same boy, a man now grown
who wandered 'bout as one who owned
all that he saw, Main Street to dell?
It's a trick, that in effect
the young from mem'ries ghost protects,
yet haunts us all, beloved kin
from dwelling on what might have been
but for times continual trek.
I always forget
But there’s nothing left of me to sell
Every time I close my eyes
Cross my heart and hope to die
Holding my heart, forcing my hand
To the graveyard
Despite my already torn heart
Everyday I try to drown my heart.
No worries if I fail tomorrow’s a new day
Another chance to fade away
by.nobonumb
I asked you once to just come cuddling,
but you didn't believe in all my muddling.
And who can blame you when I am
the self-destructed on command.
But I meant it then, and maybe soon
you won't hate what I am turning to.
I'm drowning in my sad and sorry,
with head beneath the sleek and starry
cascading solar plexus known
to only those who've sank below.
But given time that's going by,
I want to emerge and deify
my living self to all who'll stand
and deliver hands to my own hand.
But before all that there was just you.
You were the muse that I abused.
You tantalized and brought me through
with your sun tan shining and verbose too.
I wanted to just dive in depths
and dig myself as we both wept,
but you had seen for better yet,
at least there was the time we'd spent.
And you would not perform for me
unless I'd ask so nicely,
because down deep you had enjoyed
the things we did, the way we toyed
with the thought of lasting for some years,
awash in fog on your windshield.
I grasped your hips and held on firm
as you would observe and squirm,
complaining and convulsing forth,
issuing an order toward
a barren strait where I'd laid down
my laiden craft and dressing gown
with tassles matched upon the cap,
now caked with dirt and mobile scrap.
And when I turned to snort and sneer,
I saw you as you disappeared.
Yet you deserve a lover's song,
though we weren't in love for long.
But my fingers don't have much to give
so you'll just have to live with this:
this shuffling of my flaunted words
that leaves us both so undisturbed,
but conveys a sense of love and loss
that tosses with my every thought.
Maybe it's just the loneliness,
but I'm lost in odes to my distress
and wishing for a sweet new vine
to yield the grapes of soul divine.
But I'll keep a hold on the maps I made
while exploring you and your terrain,
and melt myself with memory
while you find a replacement for me.
i regret being with
is all he said
but i heard much more
i heard so many things
that were wrong with me
and who i am
i heard you're blonde
you're not my type
you're not worth it
in my head
i heard more things
each tearing me apart
i heard one last thing
and thats all there is
this is how it will be forever
there's nothing left
of my heart
or my soul
not a single shred
left to hold on to
its been ripped
apart so many
times
as if thats the way
life is supposed to be
for me..................
heading in a downward
spiral towards
nothing
thats what lies
ahead for me
.......................................
.......................................nothing
betrayed, regretted, not the right type
wrong, nothing
nothing
nothing
nothing
nothing
A few weeks have gone by
I can't get you off my mind
We didn't end things very well
It's awkward can't you tell?
We need to talk this out
Things can't be left with all this doubt
I need to know where we stand
I know this situation isn't grand
But your the one who started this
The ending became my only wish
We could get into so much trouble
If our promises turn to rubble
There will be no place we can hide
We'll be taken on a very long ride
If that time comes we'll have to try
Making up a very good lie.