what i have i don't deserve

this beautiful relationship

i shouldn't preserve

it's not for me, i make him sad

he should find another

who makes him glad

he's always there

to make me smile

i'm just too horrible

dispicable, and vile

he deserves better

i know he does

but what should i do

it's me he loves

i want the best

for him and his life

and all i do

is bring heartache and strife

what do i do though

i just can't see

why did this have to

happen to me

i want him happy

but i can't complete

maybe it would be better

if i would just delete

myself from his life

so he could start anew

he deserves so much better

if only he knew

Author's Notes/Comments: 

i hate being me

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Lost Abortion

Teenage Chronicals

A child is formed not fully developed

His life is about to change

And he can't yell for help

His mother can't care for him

As so as she says

She doesn't relize

It gives her un born child pain

Oh they can't feel it everyone says

Once it is done she will regret what she did]

I can't stand it it makes me so sick

All these kids care about is sex

Not of the child there about to make see

It's just a lack a responsibility

They say use protection or a Birthcontrol

Pill If that doesn't work

you can have your un born child killed

Sick Minded i think it makes me so sick

Having to deal with abortion so quick

But don't take my opinion just chuck it out

The door don't you relize your bringing a

Child into our world

Get rid of abortion oh please as i say

It's a diffrent story if the person is raped

And thats why i want my opinion to stay

Abortion say no pro choice is not a question

It is an excuse just have the damn baby let

Him set loose once he is born he will

Remeber for all like almost having an

Abortion and making it his fault

As he grows up you know you made a good call

He will be running around having a ball.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

I had 3 friends get pregent and they all had an abortion because they didn't want the child and chose not to use protection. I hope this poem does not affend anyone in any way if it does i am sorry. No wait i don't because it's murder murder. Sincerely Elliot Bush

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I see someone trip

they are hurt

no one notices

I look away

their pain is unbearable

they can bearly breathe

blood is everywhere

no eyes drawn

she is panting

she lays on the ground


here, gone, here


she's cold

no life left


someone screams

they cry

she tripped

but only I knew

I appologize

if I were to have

said something

she could have lived

I have sinned

too late now

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closet boxes 2002

You ask me why i'm leaving you

well i'm better off alone

i'd rather be alone then used

not waiting by the phone.

You don't believe i'm willing

to simply lose it all

you can laugh all you want

I don't intend to fall.

How many more have fallen victim

just stop and think for real

I can take the truth

though you try hard to conseil.

Tell me it's not worth it

well tell me then,what is

I refuse to be remembered

as a girl just simply his.

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"Re: Tuesday"

by Jeph Johnson


Tammy wrote
Tuesday morning,
good morning
and wasn't sure
if I would even be up yet
but she was thinking about me
and asked me in an email:
"Are we still on for this evening?"

Tuesday Morning
in my mind
in my heart
in my soul & spirit
no switches have been clicked


Tuesday Afternoon
perhaps sometimes
to be spiritually closer
people must be
physically farther away

Tuesday Evening

WE are still ON
something like this
I am sorry but...
I cannot switch OFF


Tuesday Night
no way out
or resolution.


Either way
some sadness...


But be sure
(or pray)
the sadness
is overshadowed
by love

Author's Notes/Comments: 

for Tammy, 2002 

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closet boxes 2002

This illusion of power

you have over me

is truly convincing

how does it feel to see

that you've fooled yourself

and not just me,

a knowledge corrupt

with a balance that's tipped

as your own undoing

champion to none but yourself

through the answers beneath.

Stare at the surface

in seeking me

of this you fear

risk your realities

of which your decieved,

try to keep this faith

to keep silent is something

of which you don't dare

a life is changed

through the paths you did take.

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the front door opens

its creaking sound signals

you're back

too late

i'm already halfway


the back door.

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The Nature of Change

With the passage of life,

We find the marriage to the soil,

Whether the Earth the wife,

Or the reception for our toil.

With the light and forces,

Of nature’s unrelenting land,

We carry the chorus,

To lift us by the hand.

It is for a moment,

That the might and grace depart,

But like a sonnet,

Is returned from when’st it start.

And the love we know,

And world we have,

Gives us strength to grow,

And look appreciatively back.

As respect in solace,

And remembering the grace,

Helps keep the promise,

And the sanctity in our place.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

At a time when the only certainty was uncertainty as seven Great lives I personally knew were re-allocated within a year.

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The price of immortality


As my withered body burns.
My blood filled stomach churns.
Sanguine tears fall to the ground.
My soul is lost, never to be found.
I feel my limbs grow colder.
For immortality I fear I've sold her.

The blood boils and tears.
Through her hollow eyes she stares.
Into my hollow soul unsound
Now I sit down by the river bed.
Regret flowing through my head.
But to the night, I am wed.
My body blistered burns instead.
To plight of the ever piercing sunlight.

I long for her even though she's gone.
Still watching me from her cold stone grave.
Her voice, faintly whispers like a song.
However she is free, and not a slave.
To this torturous world of the darkened day.
Now my life is nothing but a bloody cry.
Sometimes I wish I could join her and die.
But my soul is lost and left unsound.
If I was to truly die and placed beneath the ground.
Never again would my weary soul come around..

Author's Notes/Comments: 

This was wrote a long time ago. Everyone thinks of the benefits of not dying, but what about the impending consequences, because every decision has them..

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