put to pasture

The good and faithful steed

I know I'll never be,

and I've the haunting feeling

that modern machines will replace me.

And to break my neck,

to check that beaten path,

close one eye, do the math.

How did I get this far away?

I know it's not

like good animals to stray

but I've held these urges at bay

all night and all day,

all night and all day.

If I give in,

I can't take back what has been,

though what will happen

shall surely be the means to a tragic end.

but to the good and faithful anchor

I'll go,

leaving behind this tearful trail of sorrow

for a better shore.

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Weeding the thorns,

Sorting the stones

Tilling the soil,

Sowing in tears.

Not in vain,

But to gain,

Planting the grains,

Waiting for the rains.

This travail,

This training,


Soul draining.

Not expected,

But suspected,

Thorns in Roses,

Roses with Thorns.

Not in vain,

This pain,

It's for gain,

Gain of grains.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Endure whatever pains come to you, there are gains behind the pains

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THE GREAT AH HA! (a writers creed)

By KK Ryder © 1998--Inspired by Pamela Phillips Oland - Author of "The Art Of Writing Great Lyrics" and "The Art OF Writing Love Songs" (Allworth Press)

The Great Ah Ha !

I keep having these great ah ha’s

but no songs seem to appear

I’m writing fast like I know I should

but then it disappears

I’m tryin all the tricks of the trade

like skippin vowels

I’ve written so many words

I’m even out of paper towels

I’ve written on pt, tp, matchbooks and bar coasters too

excuse me what was that you said

I wasn’t trying to ignore you

I have all these words and rhyming lines

the great ah ha is what it’s called

sometimes they clutter my mind

and don’t let me think at all

I reject lyric after lyric

I scribble it out and throw it away

but then the next line seems to catch

I scribble it down and make my say

I’ll sit here in the tub with my glass of wine

if the great ah ha trys to strike

then I’ll catch that line

I just turned on the radio

can you imagine that

someone’s rakin in the dough

on my ah ha, oh that dirty rat

Well that just goes to show

anyone can catch a line

but the one that runs and gets it done

is the winner every time

You know what I’m talking about

you poets and song writers out there

the ideas are floating all around

just play catch me if you dare

If your writing from your heart

and there are tears streaming down your face

be bold, let a piece of your soul

become part of the human race

Don’t be so critical, not every line is right

stick it away for another day

or in the middle of the night

If you feel like hanging it up

you will never ever know

how good it feels to be rewarded

for letting your great ah ha show !


Author's Notes/Comments: 

If You read the books mentioned...You will AMAZE even your inner "MUSE!"

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United We Stand

All of these people around me with their eyes filled with tears feeling sorrow inside again, on this day, realizing their deepest fears. The pain we feel cannot be described, but we all share the broken heart way down deep inside. We will always remember the ones we lost, and be thankful for the ones that are still here. Since this horrible tragedy has happened, we will hold those people even dearer.

We wish this had never happened, even though we are stronger for it. If we could undo it at all ,we would, even if it were just for a single moment. This incident has put our country to the test. Because of our love and unity we have retaliated stronger than our enemy would have guessed. We will always stay together and refuse to be pushed around, even though we've taken a low blow and fallen to the ground.

We will fight for our freedom, now that we have risen from our fall, and we won't stop fighting until we have revenge for it all. Now that the dust has settled and we see very clearly; we will realize every person as part of our family and hold them all very dearly.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

I wrote this on the year anniversary of the attack on 9/11.

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The Worth of Inebriation

I have filled my body with too many sensations

In a futile attempt to appease with poor compensations,

And now I can't sleep unless it be something I will;

After all I have done, it is hard to be still.

I'm bursting, I'm brimming

Not with the life I once knew,

But with cheaper indulgence

That helps me pull through.

At the end of the day as at the break of the dawn,

I'm aware all of a sudden of how far away I have gone.

There is little that's left worth any commendation,

It is hardly enough just to sit out the duration

When there is so much better

That could occupy my time

Than mulling over stale losses

And paying them off with smaller cents than a dime.

Life's pleasures are simple,

Its pains have proven more complex,

And sometimes I wonder

if it's worth waiting for what is next.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

This is not about any chemical substances, just emotions (what else!)

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get off my back

My time is my own

Leave me alone

Vicious intent, sheer rudeness

A pinch of nastiness….

All ingredients in a

Potion you try to invent

Just by keeping track of the time I spend

Real happiness is effectively prevented

At any cost

Like the demanding of my skin

Painful chills you shall receive

All because you didn’t believe

In this black woman’s desire to achieve

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how i feel

I live a life no one understands

A hard one I took in my own hands

Where I care for my kids and love my man

And everything is supposed to go as planned

All is intact happy and well adjusted

Til my world swelled up, then cracked and busted

My treasures taken away and my life damaged

Judged constantly on how I handle it

By eyes that have no reference point

That never felt a loss so deep in their loins

Yet find a way to dictate the way I should heal

When they can’t deal with a pain this real

trying to give me comfort without the thought

of just how they would be if they felt this distraught

call me a quitter, loser, crutch seeker

when in my shoes even they say they’d be weaker

fear resounding chaos and strife

living with the shock of day to day life

ridiculous difference minus my babies

thinking of joining them someday maybe

to feel them in dreams that become so real

a life that surely ended when the caskets were sealed

begin anew so they say

cuz you can’t bring back yesterday

lost in life, lost to death

muster all I got to take another breath

to see them here smiling and happy

jokes so silly all knees we’re  slapping

my only wish now and forever

is to fix this life and make it better

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The Asylum Seeker

Displaced from nowhere

To once again- nowhere.

Which I learned to call

A home- for a moment.

Pushed by ignorance

Pulled by hopes and dreams

Faced with uncertainties

Lethargic- for a moment.

From nowhere to nowhere,

Now, Where shall I be?

Cover and bring to safety

This estranged refugee.

Secure me from danger

Of a rich and wasted life.

Ignoramus, an 'indio', I may be

Still I believe in a space made for me.

Somewhere here or there,

I am free to be me

And finally make history

Of this perpetual atrocity.

Somewhere here or there,

I shall find asylum

As I endure to believe

That 'home' is more than just a dream.

Author's Notes/Comments: 

I hope to find my place...so my life will fall in place.~�jerlin 31Mar05

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Before The Fire

Before the fire,

I held tightly to my illusions.

Safety, comfort, support, warmth, acceptance...

I liked my illusions, and I miss them.

Now, after the fire,

I stand accused.

They say "You don't relax, enjoy, attend, nest...any more."

I say "You don't want to face the impermanence of it all..."

They say "You're no fun any more."

I say "You don't have anything real to give to me."

They say "You don't play any more."

"We think we will fire you as our friend."

I say "The hell with you and your stability."

I still smell smoke...

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Hold on to your illusions...

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