Every single note was a song in itself
And every little breath was a melody
And I, a painful ripping squeal
That bellowed from inside of me
Her crimson lips had softly smiled
As she sang angelically
But no more than a dissonant chord
Was the best that I could be
Oh, angel of the nightly song!
How wrapped in you I have become!
How can I go, and sing alone
Shouting like a falling drum
I can't forget your heavenly voice
That pierced the ever-present noise
Through sky and the pervasive smog
To me, whom naught but death employs.
I can't tell where I'm going
Don't know where I've been
But I feel I'm moving quickly
And I guess that's all there is
I've gone round in my head
Side to side within
Reason had too much sense
Foolishness left me behind
Walking to a dirt-road crossroad
Guess I'll say hello
Whiskey from the heavens
Daniels in my veins
Traveling to hell on that southern gothic train
Baptized my humanity in the river
Left my soul with the morning star
Guess I've lost it all
They say that those with nothing left
Have nothing left to lose
Well hell, I'm far past that
With no future, and no past
Don't mess with me, son
Or my face will be your last
Whiskey's long gone now
But the moon's still shining bright
And there's heaven to gain
But hell to pay
The brass is still warm
But I'm cold as the grave
Dramatic tunes play in my mind
as I wait in bed for your replies
Took a trip, tried to listen to
A Brief Inquiry Into Online Relationships
But boy, I really should take note
that 1975 was never the year
that the internet was born
then lives got weird
Dramatic tunes swirl in my mind
Nauseating and mesmerizing, all at once
I trace all the pieces I could find
to draw the image that may resemble you
and draft the letters I could think of
but never would I send to you
Dramatic tunes leech on my mind
Trying to design my last demise
The nothingness on their side,
churning violence all coincide
Dramatic tunes play in my mind
As I wait for your replies
The darkness would soon arrive
here and hear my last goodbye
The flock of crows are closing in
Floating just three feet above
But then I feel my eyes flinch
As the phone buzzed
Do not weep for me now
For I am back in my mother’s arms
Do not morn another day
For I walk in peace
With those who have been waiting in the light
To share their everlasting love
Do not be saddened
For I have been blessed with your love
And carry it in my heart
To my new plain of existence
Do not be afraid
For I am a part of the light that shines down upon you
And brightens your way towards your future
Do not feel lonely
For I am the one who will watch over and protect you
Until we again walk hand in hand
To our eternal place of peace
The sheer speed slices through the ensemble of snow and rain. Though, speed kills. Trucking along a highway, alone and abandoned. No other car on the road to make a makeshift companion. The sun is down, depressed, and distraught. The clouds cloud the sun like hands covering a crying face, the sun whimpers and the car slightly swerves out of place. The earth darkens as you squint out of a box. The headlights at maximum light, like speed in the snow, they cut through the night. Boredom and isolation reach you, like a rush of blood to the head. Stuck in your thoughts, as you barely look ahead. The roads are sheeted in ice, yet you truck on. The road narrows, becomes one lane. You peer through your rearview, out of instinct, hoping to busy your mind. Though, the car is silent, and your head is live. You think to yourself, what a terrible time to drive. You think to yourself, why am I alive? Wherever you are going, you ponder if you should arrive. You could just offroad into a snowbank, little chance you would survive. Speed kills. Yet, your hands stay at ten and two, and that little windshield you continue to peer through. The questions linger in the eerie silence. A cellular ring surprises you, though not enough to throw you off. You pick up the phone, and answer with ennui. The other side delivers noise to your ear, you listen and the sounds of the car on the road disappear. Your lethargic attitude soon fades away, as a radiant smile extends from ear to ear. As boredom washes away, so do the thoughts. Why even question your existence or possibly intervene, because a smile erases everything. The voice on the other line utters verbal caress, and the more they talk, they more you think less. You realize the desolate drive had you questioning away. In reality, you desire to live another day. The smile still radiates through sleet and snow, the sun still whimpers, but you feel warm. Happiness invades your personal space, and the drive you so detested, soon doesn't feel that way. The phone shuts, but the smile rests in place. So you hold steady, hand on ten, other hand moving back to two. Back in control of the wheel. Back in control of your thoughts. You truck along, the speed of your car still unchanged, and the lights on the car still beam through the lifeless night. But, before you know it, your caught in the headlights. The smile unchanging until your last breath departs, you would feel surprised but you just give it no mind. You think of the call, and the voice that made you smile so. If only you could've made it home through the storm, through the sun's melancholy. If only you could've seen the sun happy again. If only you could've reached that voice. Though, speed kills. The car up in flames, your body an icy red heap. Your soul exits, yet the smile stays, as your body lay caught in the headlights, that have now succumbed to the darkness of the night.
If I want to die
then let me be
just say bye
and set me free
Crying on the floor
all alone, like you left me
on all fours, your knees are sore
just forget me... and let it be
If I want to die
then let me be
dont question why
just say bye
and set me free
Let me fly away, far away
far from here
I, cannot stay
so let me lay, don’t you fear
If regret reappears
wipe your face, from the tears
dont you dwell on those years.
So, if I want to die
let me fly
let me be
just say bye
and set me free.
My time will come
when i am done
i will get my oblivion
Hopefully accomplished
a being cherished
The light of my soul extinguished
Stilled engine of life
no more world of strife
The fear of my hope is rife
No more of this pain
no more sad refrain
i will not be coming again
All gone away
I would reast from that day
struggling no more that i may
Slepp with no dreams
no more invisable beings
It wont matter am apart from the seams
In memory to exist
in peoples minds to persist
Just a being to be remenised.
Full speed, fantasy about being under my own tires, expressing myself getting even harder, Nowhere2go, not enough prayer for you, your mind is tainted and no one will ever love you, Dancing in holy white, hoping I get her attention, driving fast, gma come get me, fantasy about being under your tires, expressing myself getting impossible, the army saving my life, there are times where I breathe and I feel like im losing my life, my lungs are expiring and I'm gasping for air, and niggas around me can't even tell, Danielle, I hate that I still love her, fuck it, I'll see her in hell, I'm falling for a girl, who is the same, Jesus take the wheel, nowhere2go, there is, not enough prayer for you, I've spent my whole life depressed, I wanna end myself, my silence is golden as fuck, when I seem happy, people don't have to look, the shadows where they dwell, in the light wishing me well, I can't see and I'm paranoid, drowning myself in addiction hoping I blend in, I've been home for only a few days, and it sinks in, and it sinks in, no one loves you, nowhere2go.. I've spent all my life depressed.. thinking about death.. hoping my time is next.