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Of Marble Stone, Copper, n Lead, and

Once, 

I was a tool of death .

A skill, I've learned, for evermore.

And so does, yet, still remain.

I've kissed, the blade.

I've pledged, my troth,

to....

God, the devil,  n ......death !

I'm, too sad for slumber.

I'm too, lonely to sleep.

I can't rid my head,

from, that pervading scent ......

Of ... What the darkness brings...

A, prelude.... to death !

And it's stench, has filled the air.

Its sweetly ,sickly perfume.

That lingers.

That's reminiscent.... 

Of rotting flesh, of corpses.

Of the expiration of life.

Of a smell....

Of

dead flowers.

Giajl © Jim Love

The death of any one we love is a nightmare

and is bound to make us feel sad…and numb

May we be blessed with someone to hold onto

whenever that nightmare comes

I don’t know how memory works…where it ends…or where it starts…

but today I found it guided me to the cemetery of my heart.

It’s a solemn, meditative place that in the heart has no parallel.

The final resting place where our memories go to dwell.

Every person in the world…anyone who’s ever taken a breath

Even if they haven’t yet…will one day have to cope with death.

I’ve lost people I love…my parents…family…friends

It’s an inevitable fact of living that…some day…life will end.

When touched by death…memories rush in and the ensuing sorrow can paralyze

then slowly…ever-so-slowly…out of our sadness we start to realize

that the one we lost would not want us to remain sad forevermore…

and we do our best, in their memory, to live…as we once lived before.

It’s as if when death infects us…in an instant…overnight…

the world that once was filled with joy…turns to a gloomy black and white.

Then slowly…if we’re lucky…the healing process begins…

and with the help of our family and friends our smile…and our colors slip back in.

To ensure our memories do not fade away…even though we will forever be apart

we find a quiet place for them to rest…in the cemetery of our heart.

Which is where if found myself this morning…at the dawning of the day…

planting flowers on the graves…and remembering…those I’ve lost along the way.

As the old sage lie before them…about to take her final breath..

a student whispered. “Oh, wise one why you have not taught us

how to prepare for death.”

Her students gathered 'round and waited…

for it was her way to think on questions for a while…..

When she was ready with her answer…

the old woman looked at them…and smiled.

“Have I not taught you about love?” she said.

“How to open up your hearts?”

“How to find beauty all around you…how friendship is an art.”

“Have I not taught you acceptance and compassion.” she continued.

“How to open up your minds?”

“Have I not taught you peace and happiness begin with being kind?”

“If you have lived these teachings,” she smiled, 

“then you need learn nothing more…for you will be prepared

when death comes knocking at your door.”

“If you’ve have lived your life with love as your guide…”

“If you’ve shown everyone you cared…”

“You might not be ready when death calls…but you will definitely be prepared.”

“If you are the kindest person you can be,” she said, 

“you are prepared for death.”

Then she smiled her last smile as she took her final breath.

They thought she hand’t prepared them for death…

hadn’t prepared them for their final climb….

until they realized in teaching them how to live

she was preparing them all this time.

This is a story about Lena, a beautiful, innocent little bird

who taught us by the way she lived why life is such a pretty word.

From her first moments in the nest it was plain to see

by her actions and her attitude…how special she would be.

She was curious and inquisitive…always asking who, what, when where…why

She loved to play with other birds…loved to spread her wings and fly.

She had this wonderful imagination…that’s what made this little bird glow…

“Mommy,” she would ask, “if you won a ticket to anywhere…

where would you choose to go?”

And wherever her imagination took her…

whatever fantasies her heart was busy designing

She imagined her friends and family were with her…

in a place where the sun was always shining.

When one adventure was over…innocently and without pretext…

She would smile and say, “Oh, that was fun!. I wonder what happens next!”

She was a gift from the creator to this world…one of the best things she has ever done…refreshing as a summer breeze and brighter than the sun.

But this little bird’s life was short…it seemed she was only in her dawn…

when suddenly…and without warning…our little bird was gone.

When one’s heart is broken…when our flower no longer blooms

how do we go on?  How do we find any gladness in our gloom?

By remembering Lena our beautiful little bird..

who taught us in the short time she was here how life is such a pretty word.

And by trying to live, as Lena would have wanted…

innocently…without pretext…

each day smiling at the thought of her 

while imagining…

what will happen next.

Recently, after a long battle which cancer…a battle that lasted years…

our friend’s daughter’s lost her battle…which brought us both to tears.

Cancer! How I hate that word because from the moment the battle begins

no matter how hard a person fights…sometimes cancer wins.

There is no right way to cope with death, despite what the experts say

we muddle through our sadness our anger…sometimes we wonder why we pray.

I don’t know how her parents will ever accept their cherished daughter is gone

I wonder how from this moment…they ever will move on. 

There isn’t a person among us who has ever taken a breath

that hasn’t had to deal with loss,…and try to cope with death.

I’ve lost my mom and dad and other family and friends

It’s a basic fact of living that someday life will end.

At first the memory is fresh and the sadness can paralyze

then slowly one day out of the sadness we come to realize

that the one we lost would not want us to remain sad forevermore

and we try to go on living as we once lived before.

It’s as if when death infects us, in an instant, overnight

our world that once was filled with color, turns to black and white.

Then slowly with the help of family and friends the healing begins

and one day, if we are blessed, the color seeps back in.

And we’re able to store our memories with all the memories of those who depart

in a place I like to think of as the cemetery of the heart.

It’s a quiet, solemn place that in our heart has no parallel.

The final resting place where our fondest memories go to dwell.

Where we can walk among them any hour of any day

so the one we lost forever is never far away.

I know this may sound corny, this belief I am revealing

and I know it’s no consolation for the grief our friends are feeling

But when the burden of their grief begins to lighten…when their healing process starts

I hope their fondest memories of their daughter find a quiet place in the cemetery of their heart.

It was the first happy/sad moment in your daughter’s young life…one all parents fear…

Her first birthday after her Grandma died…when her mom suddenly noticed her tears.

“I understand what you’re feeling.” Her mom said, “because I am feeling it too.”

Then she took her hand and said…”Come with me…I want to talk to you.”

They took a walk together…just the two of them…hand in hand…

with her mom hoping she could find a way to help her daughter understand.

“Love is a strange and beautiful emotion.” She said. “You learn as time goes by

how our love for a person can make us laugh…and when they’re gone can make us cry.”

“You will find throughout your life on special days like today…or at random moments memories of Grandma will appear…which will make you feel happy as you remember her…but sad that she’s not here.”

“When those memories of Grandma find you…they’ll usually catch you off guard…

and though the memories are happy…they can make a moment feel a little sad and lonely and hard.”

“That’s why days like today will always be filled with a mix of emotions…it’s inevitable because your heart…will always be happy to remember the times you were together… and be sad that you’re apart.”

“But time has a way of soothing the heart…you’ll find over the years…

you’re memories of Grandma will be filled with much more laughter and, trust me,

a few less tears.”

“And we have something special…we are lucky…you and I.

We can help each other remember the laughter…those times we want to cry.”

“I’ll make a deal with you when it comes to joy.”

Mom said emphatically and with aplomb…

I’l help you remember Grandma’s….

if you help me remember Mom’s.”

She loved visiting her grandma…at Grandma’s everything just seemed right…

She especially loved those times she got to spend the night.

Because as she grew she began to find comfort in the wisdom of Grandma’s words…

Her favorite moments were sitting under the stars…and in the morning…feeding the birds.

“Sometimes when you’re not here I get lonely.” Grandma said in a sad but hopeful tone.

“But when I talk to the stars or visit with the birds…I don’t feel so alone.”

At night Grandma would point up…then squint…looking through one eye

and teach her the names of the stars…her friends up in the sky.

In the morning once the two of them had rolled out of their beds

Grandma would introduce her to the birds in her backyard as they fed them crumbs of bread.

She was remembering these moments as they left the house for Grandma’s funeral…

“Wait! I’ll only be a minute.” She said 

then she ran back in the house and came out with a loaf of bread.

When the funeral was over…she gave her Grandma a tearful wave..

then began to sprinkle bread crumbs gently around her grave.

“What are you doing?” Her mother whispered…coming up behind her.

“Sprinkling bread crumbs, Mom.” She said. “So the birds know where to find her.”

“The bread will bring her friends the birds…of this I have do doubt.

The birds will keep her company during the day…until the stars come out.”

As she leaned against her mother she said…in a sad but hopeful tone…

“This is the best way I can think of…so Grandma will never be alone.”

To this day when she visits…

she still gives her Grandma a wave…

then as she’s done so many times…

she sprinkles breadcrumbs on her grave.

The funeral was over and as a new day dawned…

He was asked, “What will you miss most about him…now that he is gone?”

He did not answer right away…no…he thought on it a while…

as tears fell from his eyes and caught the corners of his smile.

And for a moment…a lovely moment…he felt lighter than the breeze…

as he floated on his tears through a sea of memories.

Then, with sorrow and joy harmonizing together in his tone…

“I will miss those moments that belonged to us.” He said.

“Moment that were ours…and ours alone.”