I engage these feelings every day, hoping to one day grow numb to them and the things that they make me write. I'm so tired of spewing bile about my loneliness and how little I feel my life is worth. I don't know what or how to attain it, but I need something new; something that will jar me from my ambivalence and inspire me to, at the very fucking least, write about something that isn't myself, and how miserable I am.
