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I took a moment visit my God today…

I don’t usually do this…but I got down on my knees to pray.

I wanted to ask him…or her…

(I use both, I believe, correctly

because in all my visits with my God…

he or she has never answered me directly).

At any rate, I had things I wanted…things I’d like to see..

wishes I thought important…

I hoped my God would grant for me.

As I was about to open my mouth…

about to give my God my speech

my mind was filled with memories 

of the students I used to teach.

There before me...swimming in my mind, 

my students were everywhere..

Autistic students, blind ones, ones with seizures…

and students in wheel chairs.

And swimming right behind my students…

this was really quite a feat

were children and people I did not know…

who had no homes, or food to eat.

I saw many people in pain, crying,

I know not the reasons why

but they seem to have more troubles than me 

as I watched them floating by.

Suddenly my mind went blank 

and I forgot what I had started praying for

as the troubles that I thought I had…

didn’t seem as troublesome anymore.

And so still on my knees with my head bowed 

as I visited my God today

it was for all these other people 

that I began to pray.

And I hope my God is happy 

as my prayers up to her or him soar…

smiling and proudly nodding his or her approval…

knowing that’s what prayers are for?

God means so many different things to so many different people 

whether you worship in a mosque, a synagogue or pray under a steeple.

Many struggle their whole lives looking to find a way

to understand who their God is and what he or she is trying to say.

For proof of a God look around you, look to all creations on this Earth…

the flowers that bloom, the rain that falls, the miracle of childbirth.

Look to the birds that fly, the winds that blow, look to the changing ocean tides

I think wherever you find innocence and beauty that’s where God resides.

I’m reminded of a story about a doctor who in a hospital one day

had a heart attack, fell to the ground, and in that same instant passed away.

His son, also a doctor, tried but couldn’t get his father’s heart re-beating

(How often we are reminded that life is nothing if not fleeting.)

The son was having a hard time coping with the sudden loss of his dad

as he tried hard to fight the bitterness that came with being sad.

He was doing rounds one afternoon and walked up to a young boy’s bed

“You look so sad,” the young boy observed, “is that because you’re father’s dead?”

The doctor bristled at the innocence of this boy who recently turned seven.

“He must have been a really good doctor.” The boy remarked, 

“For God to call him up to Heaven.”

The doctor looked at the boy who seemed to be enjoying their little chat.

“I hadn’t ever thought about it, Billy, tell me, what makes you think that?”

“Well, God must have been pretty sick that day…I imagine he was feeling pretty bad…

and even with all the doctors he has in Heaven…that day…he chose your dad.”

The doctor smiled as he felt himself emerging from his gloom…

Smiled…as he felt the presence of his God within that room.

Smiled at the beauty and the innocence of a little boy who guides…

Smiled as he was reminded where his God resides.

You may think I am peculiar…you may think me a little odd

when I still say I am not religious but I do believe in God.

So let me share with you for a moment…a few qualities I’ve compiled

Of my god…the one I’ve been praying to…since I was but a child. 

My God is not prejudiced…not bigoted…my God does not discriminate

My God is a God of Love and sharing…my God will never not hate.

My God sees the differences in all of us…and these difference my God lauds

My God even gets along…with all the other Gods.

My God is a God of hope and faith…not a God of doom

My God instills that hope in every seedling…and has faith that every flower will bloom.

My God believes in charity, he knows the key for people to live

Is not in how much they take in life...but how much they give.

My God believes in love…knowing love shall light the way

My God cares not if I am straight, or Bi, or lesbian or gay.

My God knows no war is holy and like me prays for them to cease

My God believes in kindness…my God believes in peace.

My God has given me the ability to decide what is right and what is wrong

My God knows I’ll make mistakes for he knows my journey’s long.

My God only asks that I show kindness and treat everyone the same

so when I die people will smile at the mere mention of my name.

For nothing in this world would bring a broader smile to my God’s face

than knowing everyone my God created would leave this world a better place.

As you may surmise from this list of qualities I’ve compiled

The God whom I still pray to…is the God I prayed to as a child.

If you think that makes me peculiar

If you think that makes me odd

know I am oddly, peculiarly happy

In the comfort of my God.

In the middle of a pandemic every time that she was asked

She said, “My God will protect me!”…and so she did not wear a mask.

Still the virus overtook her and her friends and family cried

as her breathing slowly stopped

and eventually…she died.

She arrived at the gates of her Heaven 

feeling frustrated, confused and admittedly…a little odd

“Why didn’t you protect me?” was the question she asked her God.

“I sent so many angels to you,” her God shrugged,

“each angel with a mask and willing to share it…

but every time they offered…

you refused to wear it.”

Sometimes when the world saddens me

at night when I fold my hands to pray

I like to think how things would be quite different

If I was God…for a day.

The first thing I’d do is eliminate hate

I’d throw everyone’s hate away

I’d replace all their hate with love

If I was God…for a day.

With love in our hearts we’d accept everyone

we meet along the way

no matter how different they seem to us…

If I was God…for a day.

If I was God…for a day.

Everyone would grow up healthy, safe, secure and well fed

We’d all live long and happy lives 

and die peacefully in our beds.

I’m sure there’d be more to do

more problems to face along the way

but this seems like a great place to start

If I was God…for a day.

Of course this will most likely never happen

I may never get to be God for a day

but at least it gives me something to hope for

at night…when I fold my hands to pray.

When I see people using God as a way to discriminate…

as a reason for their prejudice…their bigotry and hate

I am filled with sorrow and my heart is filled with woe

as I wonder how it is their God can differ so much

From the God I’ve come to know.

The God I know is a God of love…

a God of Kindness…

a God of care

The God I know treats everyone the same…

every creature…

everywhere.

The God I know does not hate…

not me…

not them…

not you.

Which makes me wonder… 

why, in God’s name…so many people do?

I have one wish when I see people who…

in God’s name…seeds of hatred sow

I would love to introduce them

to the God I’ve come to know.

“Mommy, do you believe in God?” The daughter asked as she nestled in her bed.

After tucking her in and kissing her cheek.

“I do.” Her mother said.

“Have you ever seen God?” Her daughter asked.

Her mother shook her head.

“But you still believe there is one?

“I do.” Her mother said.

Sensing her daughter’s confusion her mother sat upon the bed.

“So is God a man or a woman?” Her daughter asked.

“Yes.” Her mother said

“It all comes down to one word.” Her mother continued

As her daughter sat up in bed.

They looked into her each other’s eyes

“It’s called faith.” Her mother said.

“Faith is believing in something you cannot see

It’s not knowing but still moving ahead…

I know right now it’s hard to grasp

but you’ll understand some day.” She said.

“And God,” her mother continued, “is not a particular person 

It’s whoever you create within your head..

The God you talk and pray to

can be a man or a woman.” She said.

They talked a little more about God

Until her daughter nodded off in bed…

The mother kissed her once more on her cheek

“Sleep tight my love.” She said.

“What took you so long.” Her husband asked

When she finally came to bed….

“Tomorrow,” his wife smiled as she kissed him.

“You put your daughter to bed.

As they watched a field of flowers gently swaying in the breeze

sitting mesmerized and awed

A young girl looked at her dad and signed.

“Daddy, do you believe in God?”

Her father paused a moment

stroked the hairs upon her head

then looked into her eyes

“I do.” He signed and said.

“Do you ever wonder why,” she signed 

as from her eye he saw a tear

“why God would put me into a world

in which I cannot hear”?

“When I think of all the sounds I’m missing…

all the music…all the songs…

I wonder…did I do something to hurt God’s feelings?

Did I do something wrong?”

“Oh no honey.” Her dad signed softly with his hands.

“Some things in life we just don’t know…

we may never understand.”

“None of us are perfect…I don’t think we’re meant to me

but you don’t have to be perfect to be beautiful to me.”

“When it comes to your hearing…I don’t know…

though an answer you are owed…

Perhaps it’s so you wan’t take for granted 

the other gifts you’ve been bestowed.”

It’s true you have no hearing…

and that problem is severe

And you will never have the chance to hear 

the beautiful things I hear…

“But perhaps without your hearing 

you see the world with more clarity…

And there is a beauty in your silence that I will never see.”

“Someday, perhaps, we’ll have our answers…

Until then by however we view beauty may we be awed..

And know every time I see you…he signed

I see the hand of God.”

Sometimes we humans can be so cruel…so unfair…so shadowy and dark…

A little girl is kidnapped, killed, then found discarded in a park.

Children are being murdered…for that matter people of all ages

Families flee into our country and are immediately put in cages.

Children are bought and sold for sex…women are abused

Survivors of these tragedies are left bewildered and confused

After every horror we create…in this country and abroad

we appeal to the heavens and ask the question…Where is God?

I wonder whenever we see one human-made tragedy end only for another to begin

if, instead of looking out for God…we should be looking in.

What if God is in each one of us…in our kindness…in the way we live

in our smile, in our touch…in our ability to give?

In a hug, a touch…a kind gesture…in every compliment we pay

in every act of compassion…in every thank you that we say?

If God is but a feeling in our heart in our mind and and in our soul…

then shouldn’t we be trying to discover her…shouldn’t that be our goal?

What if this is our mission in life…what if this is what life is all about

to discover the God in each of us…and invite her to come out?

If we realize that the God we look for is with us all along

then perhaps we’d stop asking where she is…

when we’ve done something wrong…