I love that the poem develops: I love that the poem develops with each line the 'bones' of summer. Being a fan of autumn, myself, this has been a delightful poem to read. The line: "glistened blades of jewelled eye," is quite a beauty. The mottling entwining is a wonderful transition-melding together of seasons. Thanks for sharing. /Rik.
Am I right in presuming this: Am I right in presuming this was birthed in '92? Love the concept of the "asphalt deities!" There is a saying we have, "if the trucks stop, Australia stops." Thanks for sharing.
A very pleasant rhythmic feel: A very pleasant rhythmic feel and rhyme pattern. And like the rising and ebbing of the tide caressing the shore as elusive as when little tikes play cat and mouse on the strand. Thanks for sharing. /Rik.
The coy koi swam in languid: Thank you so much for giving attention to both the content and the structure of this poem. It is particularly exciting to have innovated on a traditional form, not that this was the aim. Rather, the flow and the lines had more to do with it than intentionally seeking for something new. As it turns out it suits quite well. Thanks for that instructive and validating appraisal. The coy koi swam in languid pools of joy.
Thank you, Patricia, there is: Thank you, Patricia, there is a certain lift in grieving through poetry and friendships. You are much appreciated. /Rik.
If caesar ain't looking, what: If caesar ain't looking, what even is the point? And if Humpty is the patron saint of all the broken then we have so much to look forward to! Wonderful piece of satire. Thanks for sharing. /Rik.
A delicate, picturesque and: A delicate, picturesque and charming vacation for the senses. It gives the reader a very valuable (and don't underestimate its value) gift:
It makes us feel good. Thank you, dear poet.
The sharp focus on a: The sharp focus on a crumbling symbol of Soviet era industrialization succinctly captures the passage of time and the impermanence of mortal power. This visual commentary grants some hope in light of the current situation.
A compact and haunting presentation overflowing with meaning and emotion.
With casual grace, wit and: With casual grace, wit and perception, you expressed that profound feeling of humility and astonishment that seizes us when we ponder our lives "on a huge planet/ an enormous orb/ with billions of others/ to share my fortune", and what a flawless hit this is: "I am stoned/ in the presence of its magnitude".
Yes. It's like that.
A delightful introspection.