I wrote this last night in memory of another thought of suicide that had come through my mind. I had a scalpel in my hand and was gonna commit another untold act of cutting. I felt mindless, lost and without a soul. I couldn't help it-I've been through this a dozen million times before, and I know that I'll keep relapsing forever. Relapsing is hard, and I always end up the victor. I've always been known to be a strong person with a wonderful mind and spirit.
