The Pain of Suicide

Volume One




The Pain of Suicide”



Our hearts turning black,

there's no turning back

your hands stained red

from the blood you shed

The world is now dead

Life is but a dream, that cannot seem

draw your gun because you are dead

falling out of life

falling out of peoples memories

killing yourself for others to see

Hearing your pain, but then forgetting your sane


Kill yourself now,

I'll show you how


Forget about everyone who cares

remember all those stupid dares

and how everyone turned and stared

clear your head, Pull the trigger now

It doesn't matter, reflect on your life


Oh how you wish to have been a someone

But as you dream life gets harder

but you see how everyone hates you

so you want nothing more than to make them pay

oh how much you wish to say


"Hiding in the shadows, waiting to hear your reason why;

or how I wish to fly, to go beyond the bounds of human feelings"


But that doesn't matter now

Kill yourself, I'll show you how


Close your eyes,

all those painful memories die

Pull the hammer back, wait for the pain to take

as you begin to shake, now your life is in your hand

It's time for you to take a stand

a single tear rolling down your cheek, now on your knees.



Pray for salvation.

The gun in front of your view, if only the cure you knew.

One last look, one last touch, feeling so empty, feeling so alone

all is gone and no one home

Pick up the gun, point it to your head,

your thoughts racing through your mind

your life racing against the time

Any last words from your mouth to the open air?


"Life is not fair"


Pulling the trigger, the sound echoes through the still air

Falling towards the ground. laying in his blood..

slowly closing his eyes, as he turns his head

Now he's Dead.


Why God Why

"So much pain so little gain,

So much hate so little faith"


"Death is the only way out"













Author's Notes/Comments: 

Okay figured I'd shed a little light on this poem, its been years since I wrote it yet can still remember that day.. I was going through a very rought time in my life, and I've never been strong on the idea of suicide but then who has not thought about it? That particular night I was going through a very bad depression and as it turned out I had butchered my arm in the atempt to drown out the pain I was feeling, I believe if it were not for this poem I had wrote I could have very well been hosbitalized..


(Updated; from Psycho- Confessions)

View matthewwayne's Full Portfolio
Elfy's picture

This poem was well written,

This poem was well written, yet very sad. BUt i know that it is something that happens. We all eventully think or wonder about suicide, no matter what our beliefs or conciouses tell us. I know myself i have thought about it, and have tried a couple of times, and failed. I was quite mad at the time, but now, im very glad that i did fail. It made me see, how much life has in store for me, and how many friends and famiy would miss me. Some need me, and for them, is part of the reason, why i stay here on earth. They need somebody there for them, and ill be it ,till i can no longer be. We all go through rough patchs in life, but we got to make sure, that we can pull ourselfs out. Very personal poem and alot of emotion. And im glad that you were ok, after words.


Maryssa Bischof's picture

very powerful and vivid. masterfully done. i love reading your stuff. keep writing, youre too good not to.
Rock out to your stereO