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I hate myself

why you ask

Because I miss you every day

Because my heart longs for you in every forbidden way.

You were my heart

You were the song my soul sang

You were the breath I inhaled so deep 

The lost dream I wanted to keep.

You walked out like I wasn't worth keeping around.

Try as I might, I just can't make sense of our ending.

It's been 2 years since our goodbye

2 years where I still long for us and cry.

I've  been living in the past

Reliving the good and dwelling on the bad.

I just don't know.

I can't let go.

So here I am. I hate myself.

I hate that I'm alone in love.

I hate that I can't hate you

Most of all I hate that you're stuck in my heart like glue.

I can't escape the nightmare 

I am frozen in the past

I want to be free from our memories 

I want to be the old me

I wish I had never trusted you with my heart.

You broke me into a billion tiny shards 

I miss you in every possible way.

I miss you in the dark of night and innthe light of day.