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@ 27.225 MHz: WallStones; Afterglow
1
Just one more of that species' historic later crazes
that became stylish, then fashionable, and---
finally---normative, (like literacy, long division, and
post-scarcity economies) abetted and enabled by the
ultrasuprainternet, information superflightpath
(some phrases, like that, just linger; you know
you know them--- King James Bible, Merry
Christmas, Would You Like Fries With That?)
abetted and enabled by towering technology
founded on the lowest motives and moralities (for
fun and profit!, gotta keep up with the Joanzuz,
neighborhood values---resale potentials and all that).
2
Just imagine all the many eyes---simple or compound; or what
functioned, like eyes, in response to occasions of light---to the
flash of the engine's ignition, and the seething wreath of
flame surrounding the lower end (the butt-end, some of them
called it) of the massive rocket as it achieved lift-off, the old-fashioned
but still most cost-effective means of transport to the historic
staging base, LunarC, of a multitude of shuttlerveyors transporting
eagerly earthescpaing human beings to the safely hoveringly---
almost menacingly---distant Interstellar Conveyances (the
so-called IceyVees), ten of the humans' kilometers long, three wide.
3
I know---and we are glad, those of us that can be---that
you were not present to hear the great, collective sigh of
relief (a sigh from both organic and inorganic; a multitude of that
which knows itself as UsWeOur have achieved, already,
sentience): a vastly collective sigh of relief, long overdue
these three thousand millenia since those overreaching apes (and
still a species of thugs, the gorillas) first stood upright to
grasp what was not meant to be theirs.
Starward
we are what we are
crazes
that become stylish, then fashionable, and---
finally---normative
…
abetted and enabled by towering technology
founded on the lowest motives and moralities
That alone, tells us, what sort of egregious gorillas we are at heart.
And the seething wreath of flame, in the rear-view mirror – is our own profound ignorance… on a multi-stage burn, propelling us on the very same projectory.
No doubt, we’d be a menace, wherever we hovered.
~/~
Please forgive me for failing
Please forgive me for failing to give a timely acknowledgement to this fine comment. I greatly appreciate the comment, and your visit to the poem. My delay was rude, but I am no less appreciative of your kindness to read and comment on the poem, although I failed to reply as quickly as possible.
Starward
Another fine piece draped in your unique style
I love and often do use parenthesis quite freely in writing. Though that is something more common for me in letters, emails, and stories than in the more poetic way you use them. Never have you weilded this favored tool more masterfully than in Afterglow (at least not that I've read ; ) ). Your sense of timing here, to me, is perfect, and reaches an almost impossible harmonic smoothness, something that bracketed expressions normally are not quite rendered to do.
I happily wave the rocketeers good bye with you, as this has been a sort of fantasy of my own. We may or may not dream of different solutions to prevent them from coming back ; )
Lastly, I want to say, it's quite difficult, no matter how good the piece, to sign off with the best line of all, but you did just that with "since those overreaching apes..first stood upright to / grasp what was not meant to be theirs". Only, again, aided by your sidebar, generating a fair chuckle from me, at that. But never could it be better spoken than that they "grasped what was not meant to be theirs". Oh, indeed.
This, to me, is spectacular.
Thank you very much for your
Thank you very much for your comment and for visiting the poem. And I am very grateful for your compliment about the final line. I am usually verbose, sometimes excessively, but that line seemed to be a good stopping place. Thanks again for the comment.
Starward
Your expert storycrafting
Your expert storycrafting conspired with an entrancing conversational freedom to weave a highly significant and philosophical mini drama. The power of this commentary on the human species is in the point of view and the emotions of collective life forms on this momentous occasion.
Humans, like fleas on a dog, are doing a high-tech version of jumping off, taking with them with their brutal individualism, to a distant, artificial refuge that you cleverly described as hovering "almost menacingly". With those words you invite a momentary, unspoken question about their fate while staying focused on the collective thought of the more egalitarian beings left behind: "Good Riddance!"
The contrast between the self-centered escapees who had a ravenous appetite to "grasp what was not meant to be theirs" and the "UsWeOur" world view could open up extensive discussions on ethics, politics and theology, and that's the multilayered brilliance of your story.
Thank you. In admitting I
Thank you. In admitting I was very nervous about this one, which took far longer to draft than I would have preferred, I am not just making a casual, offhand statement in pursuit of a false humility. I was terrified of getting the narrating voice wrong, which was only the worst of several problems I was anticipating. But your comment has put my fears to rest. And I thank you for that, and for your kind words.
Starward
It's interesting that you
It's interesting that you felt that way because the voice is what makes this work. I love the wry attitude, the natural flow, the personality, if you will. It clicked. Kept me engaged. Wonderful work.
Thank you very much for those
Thank you very much for those kind words. I am again reminded of Umberto Eco's preface to The Name Of The Rose: "I was now free of every fear." Your words have that effect on me, and I am grateful.
Starward