THE WILL REMOTER

Convinction mingle with confusion
 Just as the day succeeded
Baffled. Complicated and truncated

Yet, veil in vision
Eyes collide eyes, melted
As stare stung both ends like bee venom
Obviously and subtly, gazing profusely

Which full of 'wh' questions
Distantly and remotely, commanding will 
Like a remote-operated toy in infant's hand 
Willy-nilly. At ease in presence of her figure 

And making pulsable heart to be in captive
The will remoter, heart controller
Despite, a pale silver-spoon 
Should it be on centre point? 
How well or worse will it be?

Author's Notes/Comments: 

Affection of love

View gra8mind's Full Portfolio
tags:
Morningglory's picture

very interesting... makes me

very interesting... makes me want to read more of your work. :)


Copyright © morningglory

beliefshifter's picture

lots of things to make one

lots of things to make one think in this work, interesting title

 

liked the bee sting metaphor, and 'wh' questions

 

i'd suggest not using a similie of 'remote' while describing 'remotely,' as it appears redudant

 

interesting line: the will remoter, heart controller

 

it's so interesting how "will" and "love" are close by each other often, then you have that occultist saying, "Love is the law. Love under will."

gra8mind's picture

more correction

Thanks so much please kindly make correction to it


Proper preparation prevents poor performance.

allets's picture

'wh' questions

I love a fresh/inventive image. Rare anywhere - some poems have to be studied - allets


 

 

gra8mind's picture

enlight me

Thanks so much please kindly make correction to it


Proper preparation prevents poor performance.

allets's picture

You Have Enlightened Me, Sir

It is a wondrous write. I agree with Healing Woman. Encore ~Lady A~

 

.