Author Information
THINKING ABOUT YOU
Folder:
ABSTRACT POEMS
THINKING ABOUT YOU
I've been thinking about you.
All day. We are far away.
All night. You are out of my sight.
I have been thinking about you, a lot.
I want to stop. I cannot.
I heard the word.
See, you have been thinking about me too, true.
A smile on my face.
Maybe see, you miss my sweet embrace.
A lot of good, rhythmic flow
A lot of good, rhythmic flow in this poem. Particularly in the first six lines.
One friendly suggestion, if you would consider:
If you alter "See, you have been thinking about me too, true / A smile on my face / Maybe see, you miss my sweet embrace" into "See, you have been thinking about me, too, / True - A smile on my face / Maybe see, you miss my sweet embrace", that could really build on the rhythmic effect you've created through the previous lines, while still creating the fresh shift and alteration that you laid out in the final 3 lines.