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* To Say Good-bye From Hell
Tomorrow, I will say good-bye to only a picture.
I will sit within a church, listening to the music that once would have brought comfort, but now means nothing to me.
I will remember the child I cradled in my arms as a baby . . . weep, for the grandchildren that will never be mine to hold.
Today, I stand in the midst of twisted steel and falling ash. People of lost hearts wander aimlessly. Our eyes meet. There are no words spoken between us. There are no words to describe the pain that is ours! We hope. We pray. Miracles do happen! Will a miracle be granted to us today?
They can't find you! My God, why can't they find you?
The fires burn. Hearts cry. Mother's, father's, wives and children, of all that perished with you, watch as yet another flag is draped to shelter a vessel that once held a soul. Have they found you? Please Lord, please, let them have found you!
A nightmare? This has to be a nightmare! How could there truly be such a hell on earth?
Flowers, spread amongst the rubble. Dogs, clawing at the scent of lost dreams.
The fires! Why won't the fires stop burning?
Bone aching weariness, penetrates the falling of yet another night of hopelessness. The eyes of the firemen are haunted with the reality of the next discovery. The cranes work endlessly, lifting another piece of steel to be set aside and labeled a weapon of murder.
I can't remain here! Is this hatred? Will this feeling for the madmen that have caused this, remain with me forever?
As I turn to walk away, I again see your bike in the driveway. I remember the excitement of your first baseball game! The love in your eyes as you stood to become a husband, is so plainly seen!
Small fragments of pictures that once brought joy at their remembrance has been robbed from me. Will I ever again be able to look upon them in happiness?
I leave with you this final tribute, to stand beside all the others in this cemetery of devastation. A few simple words written . . . a heart, I fear, lost forever.
"My heart remains with you today within these ashes. May it warm you in your slumber.
My tears for what might have been, fall upon the ground in which you lay.
May the prayers of all that mourn your passing, carry you gently to the arms of the Father.
The horror of this injustice will not be forgotten."
Why did I come here? Why wouldn't I listen? To remember a picture of your smiling face upon an easel, will now be . . . what should have been.
Tomorrow, I will say good-bye to a picture? HOW CAN I LEAVE YOU HERE? Dear Jesus, how can I leave you here!
You are really good at writing poetry that makes others cry. That is good. You accomplished the goal. The scene was recreated perfectly.
This one totally takes my breath away, I mean, it makes me face my own immortality and begs me to ask the question, will I go to heaven or hell and I am compelled to drop to my knees and ask for God's forgiveness. If someone isnt convicted by reading this, I would be amazed.
Remember that you type your message in here
Lesa Gay
Aspiring Angel
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Lesa Gay
Aspiring Angel
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Lesa Gay
Aspiring Angel
Hi I don't really know what to say other then it moved me in some way. It brought me back in time to a day like no other day I have experienced in my lifetime, almost disbelief. It felt as if you were telling your story. If it was your own story then I am very sorry for your loss, if it wasn't your own story I am still sorry for your loss because you make it feel so real. And yes I am truly sorry for the loss of all those souls. Moving, very moving. Thanks for sharing. Neil Frayler
Hi! Quite a nice piece of work! I think you have "summed" it all up pretty well!
Lesa, you write so well! Keep on writing, and sharing, of course!
Cletus Hardiman
"I will remember the child I cradled in my arms as a baby . . . weep, for the grandchildren that will never be mine to hold."
That one line makes me cry. The rest of the poem is beautiful, but that one line stands out.
You have a beautiful but very deep soul. Your expression of inner feelings make up for the same feelings that others feel inside but have no words. Thank you for this insight.....Ray.
I got chills reading this. Tears blurred my vision. I absolutly LOVE your writing. I want the fires to stop right along with you in this one. ~TARA
Well done. I could see and feel the desperation.
This is an incredibly moving piece. The essence of loss, the pain on the wind and the vivid emotion capture the thoughts and the eyes of the reader.
May we never forget.
WOW!!!! Lesa, this is so powerful! You've given us a look inside a mother's heart, a mother who has suffered a senseless loss. Her despair, bitterness, and anger are very evident in the words you've written here.
Excellent job, and so well written!
Tricia
Life. A photo. Partially developed. We look at this photo and see what we see. Not seeing what lies behind the yellowish tint of the undeveloped spots. We see yellow even times when there isn't. We see what we want to see.
Then comes death and suddenly this photo is in full color. We see more than we have ever seen before. We realize what we yellowed ourself was not so bad afterall.
The colors call to you. You want so bad to wake up and realize its not a static picture but life.
Lesa has a subtle, crafty manner
of using rhetorics aand imagery
to explicate the reality of
mankind's yearning soul in the
face of our human predicament.
And surely, in this piece, Lesa
has once again made our nightmares
reality. And in a humane sense
lovingly forced us to walk those
paths we fear to walk through
life because as she exclaims:
"I can't remain here!
..."
May we then move on to Jesus's
green pastures and meadow sea shores
with the essential Lesa!
Ugonna
"So much has been written
so much has been said
A little piece of all our hearts
will lay here with the dead..."
Lesa,
You have done a wonderful job of putting yourself into this mothers shoes. It takes a sensitive spirit to capture so well this agony!
Peace and love ~~~~ Dougie ~~~
Hhhhmm, then again, this poem seems very much based on 911.
Especially the stanza about the fireman (4th para).
If it is so, may i direct u to a poem of mine, in my second hall : Homecoming.
Thank u.
Indeed a heartachingly painful piece, Lesa.
Though some friends here linked its story to 911, i think it applies to other forms of tragedies, yes ?
And am i right to guess that this was written before Sept 11 ?
Thanxs for directing me here, once again.
Your sadness, anger and helplessness is very much evocative and insightful, especially towards the middle to end.
Take care.
This is very powerful. I was not personally touched by the Sept. 11 tradegy, living far away in cold Canada. But your words almost made me cry.
Russ
My Dear Lesa,
The moment I began to read this I knew, as a New Yorker, exactly where this was taking me.
Back, to the faces of disbelief, ashen gray faces and eyes who's light was lost. And this was the look of those still living. Back, to the twisted steel. Back to where for days we could not see the sun through the dust. That dust! Ash! Back to where our lungs became breathing urns. Back, to hell.
The intensity with which you write about human experiences is indeed a reflection of your hearts longing to comfort and take away the pain from those who have suffered great tragedies. Your compassionate nature transforms you out of body, into those who need your blanketing comfort.
God Bless, I am so glad to have met you.
I have thought a few times about writing how I felt about 911 but I didn't feel I would be able to do it justice. I just cannot truly imagine how the ones left behind felt, how they still feel. But I think you did a good job here. (I just assumed this was about 911 but it relates to any situation like it.)
Kris
Lesa
this is so sad, incredibly sad. THere s a whole page of what this poem brings to my mind, since i have been at the resting place in New York at broadway and fulerton for thousands myself after september 11th. So this poems is so sad for me.The whole page i could write, is already in your own mind, and you have read it before, so i will leave it written in the air, and just sign off.Amazing Poem Lesa
Renee
saying goodbye from hell... it says it all really doesn't it!
saying goodbye is never easy....we as humans need to find reason....we need to be able to understand...sometimes however death is so very senseless....and understanding is a luxury some of us may never possess....in your piece I was touched by the way your words bring life to your love, affectation, and admiration for your child...your words moved me as I heard the questions your heart keeps asking...as I read on I too felt you anger......I paused and thought a moment.... I want to say anger is very healthy ....does it every go away.....I can only speak from my own experience .....I believe the anger does linger how do you ever really get over losing someone you love some much for such a senseless reason???....however we all must find a place to put that anger away ummm ......we all somehow must learn to manage it so to speak.... BUT I strongly believe you never deny yourself the right to be anger it is your RIGHT! however I also strongly believe one must never allow the anger to defeat you for then evil will prevail ...
a tribute .....a work of art.....know today you do not weep alone....keeping writing you have a gift!
On a personal note its always important to take time for yourself ....as women we try to take care of those around us....sometimes we get so busy trying to fix everyone elses broken heart, that we tend to negelect our own
stay safe :o)
quite an interestinf piece.....I like it....
*Hey, this is Myth14 from the messageboards!! :) *
Lesa, this is a masterpiece of one person's being able to transport herself into the feelings of another. There are no words to express how gratifying it was to read this and discover it WAS NOT a true story but a very real reenactment of what had actually happened to many others. I don't think I could have critiqued if it had truly been autobiographical. Good job!!
Jessica