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Pain or pleasure?

Which one do I choose?

Aren't they the same?

I enjoy to see my blood gush,

Stare at myself inside the mirror,

Watch as the tears of pain roll down my cheeks,

I feel the knife stab a sharp sense of pain,

And I enjoy every last minute of it.

I don't clean up right away,

I wait a few minutes instead,

And watch the blood drip from my viens,

In endless amounts of pain.

I bleed away my sorrows,

I bleed away my problems,

I bleed away my sanity,

I bleed everything from my mind.

Now my mind has only one more question,

One more question with a needed answer,

Where do I hide the gashes?