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i count the minutes.. count the days.. count the years..

your memory never gone.. yet never there.. 

i count the seconds.. each night.. and each tear..

i count the loss, and pain i cant bear..

i count the lies they tell me.. day after day..

i lose count of my own.. when i say im okay, 

sometimes in time we forget.. sometimes time is what we need to remember..

as if in another dimension.. when you float between memory and forgotten.. like the long month of november..

yet novembers length nothing like october..

for the shorter time that wishes weather colder..

and your body shall sting at that sharp winds of ice..

the harsh whispered stealthy air.. telling you sweet lies..

oh i wish i could believe the lies they tell me.. 

if i could once more be blind to the truth.. 

or if only the scars would rip open.. and expose me to all i wish i knew..

anywhere but in between.. where i lie.. half awake and half asleep..

half aware.. of the many memories my brain quietly keeps..

oh sweet october memories.. your painfull bitter kiss..

waitingfor my scars to close.. to reopen it bit by bit..