Author Information
Medications: A Drug Induced Rant On Anti Depressants And How They Don't Work.
Folder:
The Influence Ok, lets get this straight. We are writers. We can't live without creativity.
I can't at least, I am not sure how many people I can actually speak for.
But, I know a majority of us has seen a psychiatric doctor before.
Or see one one a monthly basis like me. (used to anyways)
But These "Drugs" that are supposed to help us people, that are mentally unstable.
(In society's eye's at least) Need To take these medications Everyday.
Depending on your diagnosis, anxiety, depression,
But lets get real. Do we really need these medications?
They take at least a month to kick in to its full effect.
THAT IS A LONG TIME.
I have been on every drug in the book.
depicote, ridalin, xanax, zoloft, prozac, aderol
effexer, lithium, wellbutrun, atavan, concerta,
NONE OF THEM WORKED.
they would work for a short period of time.
and when all was good, everything flipped
and got turned upside down.
and boom, you are stuck trying to fend for yourself
for at least one month till you get back on track.
yeah, one month. sounds easy right?
every time I barley made it through.
One time I shouldn't of.
I got overly depressed due to the imbalance and sudden intolerance that I am now dealing with.
It is simply pure bullshit. There is no such thing as a working prescription mood stabilizing drug.
I always have to fight with myself to get through the hard times that these doctors put me through.
yeah, its not my fault. I know its there job. I am a human being. Not a statistic number.
I've been to the psych ward and reevaluated four times in my life.
four times too much. three from self destructive thoughts and one from an unintentional chemical reaction.
witch put me into cardiac arrest all due to a new drug the doctor decided to give me.
I do not agrre with these long term effects. I said FUCK IT and decided to quit taking them all.
I take aderol (more so abuse it hey, atleast I admit it) and seroquel to put me to sleep at night.
Its gotten to bad that I cant sleep a minute without my tranquilizer. These drugs i belive are
simply just psychologically addictive so we need them to function. Its the society's Creative kill switch.
Do not quote me on this but, I have read actual documentation that the some of the "illegal drugs"
have proved to be greatly effective for people with a.d.d. depression, anxiety.
and I am not talking about good old mary jane.
They have proven that the chemical in "shrooms" that makes you hallucinate
(at small doses)
can be used to treat instinctual for depression, anxiety, and pain.
same with ketamine "special K", mescaline, dxm, dmt, thc, LSD and other chemicals that or government banned from recreational use.
CAN ALL BE USED TO TREAT ALL KNOWN CASES OF BIPOLAR ANXIETY DEPRESSION, AND SOME CASES OF AUTISM.
I personally made that statement stick out like that. I hope it shocks as it did me.
especially since they started most of these case studies in the 1980's
all besides LSD non of the other drugs have long term lingering effects or flash backs.
I am outraged at the fact that I am almost forced to pay 40 dollars a month (with insurence)
to take a pill a day that doesn't do anything but keep me level and linear moods.
This a long rant but I will conclude it with.
why am I taking these medications that have almost killed me more than once.
and I get sent into rehab and considered a drug addict for recreationally using a drug that works every occasion.
the pharmicutical world is fucked. and I believe its just another corporate controlling corporation.
I will take my legal chances with using drugs that work all the time.
Despite the huge charges for distrupition and possession.
I believe hallucigencs should become legal for they have helped me find myself
love myself and belive in myself more than any prescription drug i have ever took combined.
Or you could try the tried and true ancient art of reprogramming
Choising the logical positive and enacting it into being, creating new ways of thinking an tolerating... But you are correct I have see these studies and thEse many times are repackaged and legalized. Something as simple as a salt (lithium) can change our emotional and physiological balance. I saw much pain and frustration in your rant and a sincere effort to solve your problems with various solutions. But let's make one fact clear one that I feel should really be said here, some forms of illicit drugs put forward the symptoms you describe and sends you ino a mood altering withdrawal on top. I hope it all goes well for you and the fact you can still write with these challenges which bring you into a zombie like state, imagine what if you could stand alone free from any crutches, spread your joy and fly in the feeling of a self healed man! I Enjoy your views and poetry cheers SS!
Don't let any one shake your dream stars from your eyes, lest your soul Come away with them! -SS
"Well, it's love, but not as we know it."
I dont expect you to read all this, Kinda Long lol
I always enjoy reading what you have to say.
If something as simple as a fast food burger can throw off your mood Psychologically speaking
Why are we taking prescription drugs everyday? If all these basic things around us are "manipulating our mood"
Why throw another mood manipulator on top of it. BY doing this you are basically Reconstructing how your brain thinks and feels about everything that we process. witch out causes a lot of people to be off set and never be in touch with your self. People cant decipher the difference between their own rational and irrational thoughts
I Took up every psychology class and sociology class in high school. just so I could actually read the text book on my own free time. to learn more about myself as a person and people as a whole. and just get a bit of knowledge that I claim to be useful.
I started to realize especially lately after moving so much, everything manipulates your mood. I think if the pharmacy companies or this country (not politics. but simply whoever is in charge over these situations in our world actually read one of those high school textbooks about psychology and sociology and how the two no longer really are intertwined with themselves anymore. we might have a chance to fix a big problem. But There is nothing the doctor can specifically do in under a fourteen day period to give a person who is in the midst to a chemical immunity or defect and his body no longer can receive the effect of that drug no more to help a person who will be going through two weeks of literally hell. that's what I am getting at. I under stand that some people cant produce serotonin.
that is understandable but the chances of that severe of a case of depression is slim to none also with that severe of depression there are also more of a probability for PTSD and schizophrenia.
I think the corporate pharmaceutical company's need to make a quick acting anti-depressant that is a quick fix that is labeled "take as needed". It would save lives because those anti depressants save you from a low spot for a short time yes. but strictly injecting dopamine into your brain to keep you content isn't the correct way of doing so. Because if you are off of it for only two days it takes a week for you to get back on track again. not counting the fact that you can still be content and depressed. These drugs in my opinion are just a a placebo effect after awhile. I became very in tune with my self after I quit taking anti depressants from literally teaching myself the basics of cognitive psychology to interpret the cause and of effect of each emotion i have. and decide If I am over thinking or if I should actually be as worked up as I am over whatever happened.
Not many people have access to the knowledge or can even really Plot out why they think the way they think. because everything around them is manipulating them and changing how you think. basically everything thinks for us, or whom ever it is
If people did more research and seen how hard it is to keep a stable life while on anti depressants maybe other people would see the side of these drugs that I was exposed too at I believe to think to young of an age. If you miss onehdrawing a, not the day you are having but the next day will be horrible, random concealed aggression and pity talk will seep out of anything and everything if you missed a day.
Witch I had to deal with way too many of those in my life. so when that drug stops working the way it should (its natural that our bodies build up a tolerance to what we receive on a daily basis) we have to deal with at least 14 days of those. constant rock bottom worse days ever. When I was last emitted was when i my only option was to cutoff cold turkey from meds because I actually Couldn't afford my prescriptions anymore. It was Like hitting a brick wall, because neither did the drugs make you feel as if everything was going well, its such a small effect on you you forget to notice how much your brain has changed since from prescription meds (had no choice) you started taking it, and when it stops. so it takes even longer to get though that rock and a hard place. because you dont even know what your medicine is for anymore and you think you can handle your brain after withdrawing, because you didnt know you were having a [X] amount of dopamine added to your brain daily so now not only are you trying to adjust from all the other things in life that is a mood manipulate (food, finances, RELATIONSHIPS) with a brain thats so confused is just spamming random chemicals to try to make up for the lack of the ones it has been receiving the past 4 years of his life. on top of no set sleep schedule' and 75 hour to 15 hour fluctuating work weeks trying to get adjusted to the apartment you just moved into. YOU GUESSED IT PSYCHOLOGICAL BREAKDOWN. from ambian, wellbutran, adderol, risperdol (i actually could not and still can not sleep without sleeping meds before this incident. so I had to relearn how to count sheep again.
The moral of that story is I am off of everything, completely. I haven't felt in this much control ever in my whole life. I am still am on seroquil but I literally dont know how to sleep. I can think myself into 4 days of no sleep with no adhesives. But If they would of gave me a few pills that were actually going to guarantee happiness and a simple euphoria that at least gave me the will to live through my body's drastic changes and severe withdraw symptoms. But that's the difference between an illegal drugs and legal drugs is "if it makes you happy and enjoy the simple things in life" IT IS DESTRUCTIVE and it will kill you you according to d.a.r.e. (sarcasm)
The sad truth that I found out ALL AFTER THIS (sick joke It has to be)
was that 3 out of 5 people need to get anti depression meds changed every 6 months due to a tolerance build up or the body unable break it down or a random sudden immunity to it.
...So what happend to me that terribly terrible month of my life happens to AT LEAST half of the people that need to take those kind of meds. (maybe not nearly as bad or worse) where they need to raise the dose or completely start over and give them new drug and a new problem or new unconsciousaddiction. and at that point is was anything goes and that's when I tried taking anything to try and at least to keep me movin on.
illicit drugs did send me into a spiraling slope of instability. I now stick to anything that can be pulled from the earth. (mostly)
I know my limitation's when it now comes to using.
I don't plan living a sober life (I plan on being smart and not a low life)
drugs really kinda threw me off the deep end when it comes to my passion and respect for creativity and art
so I respect a select few of the illicit drugs for doing so. (I devoted my life to writing and music)
In "Narcotics anonymous" they claim that the use of any mind altering drug is self destructive.
Which I strongly disagree on. There is definitely a line between growing "shrooms" and cooking meth.
I stay clear from anything that is addictive or an instant jail sentence.
I do believe drugs have a purpose in this world. They all have their pros and cons.
I believe "shrooms" should be legal before marijuana
due to the actually quite literal complete change of your psycho perspective of life and anything in the universe.
I could talk all day about what drugs should not be prohibited.
but moving on now. from that statement
But I was Diagnosed with bipolar at age 8. after a tough divorce.
That is what I imagine when
so I have been taking mood stabilizers and anti depressants since the 3rd grade.
It was recommended by the friend of the court during the divorce at the time.
To have a full psycho analysis done on me.
since then, i've been on prescription meds ever since.
So I believe that statement might only be half correct
for the first time I was emitted into the psych ward was in fifth grade
because I wrote a poem (how Ironic) that claimed to be self destructive
and above a fifth graders writing level that worried the teachers and the principal
and because I wrote too "emotional of a poem"
I had to spend a week in a hospital where i had to spend the night in a padded room
at age 12 because i had a plastic spork in my room.
IT JUST DOESN'T MAKE ANY SENSE!
If a child sees a lot of domestic violence when he grows up
I guess there brain turn nuts
(that's the only conclusion I have come to that made me think it was ok to put me on every drug known to man)
It's either that or Creativity is feared, for the drugs the pharmacy gives you turns a creative fantasy story into auto biography
about some random person in the industrial revolution. IT IS JUST FLAT EMOTIONLESS.
boring, bland, linear, routine and they give you medicine to help you stay focused and alert in your boring linear black and white little simple life. The youth and my generation are raised to believe we are born basically destined for a goal oriented linear life. Go to school. go to college. get a career (that you absolutely hate but do it because it pays the bills) Get Married have kids Repeat...
well i just hope the world knows that's not for me. I am one for an adventure. Pain and pleasure. Constant company of friends, Meeting people and hearing other peoples stories and have them listen to mine For if you meet enough people you have all ready seen the world. .and just living like how life became about in the first place "spontaneous" -That is my definition of a flying free man.
I would once again like to say, I really respect all the time you take out of your day to share your wisdom with me and others. I greatly appreciate it. there has been some days where it has been the actual "highlight" of my day. more than once too. YOU ARE MY FAVORITE PERSON THAT I KNOW BUT REALLY DON'T KNOW EVER :) Thank you for your response :D <3
*i just want to clarify I am sharing this story to help people in case someone that reads this is even somewhat going through the b.s. I had to deal what i know the best can lead you in the right direction. I have been there. and I have Kissed rock bottom. I do not want sympathy but if I figure I this would be that little reach out notice for anyone who has anyone questions. I educated myself on my own time to try and find a way around this bullshit with the med doctors)
just sharing an experience I had to unfortunately deal with*
G
WOW! I READ IT ALL! and I am glad I did! :)
there is a whole lotta sense in that whole lotta writing! I agree with you there needs to be some way to cope. the stupidest thing is that legalising illicit substances would take a whole lot of pressure off of crime and just labelling it medicinal would be able to tax it a get rich quick scheme if you asked me more needles sold more shit a whole lot of everything. I am very glad that you are off every med! this is a strength I find very stoic and admirable. I Have been down but never out and have never taken anything for it. I have always crawled my self out of the deep dark hole. I never taken any drugs and never drank for a very long time I used to consider it a weakness now I let my hair down more often. I think it is wonderful that you are sharing your experiences! I have quite a few friends that would benefit if they read your commentry. it is true what you say about being stable and depressed. I think anti depressants and relaxants (anxiety) are a waste of money epecially when you can grow a few herbs in your garden that would do the same eg St.John's wort etc.
what i find most ironic is your diagnosis of bipolar at such a young age when kids naturally go through highs and lows the poem and the spork even more tragic I cant believe how over zealous teacher ++++wits and do gooders overreact! kids are ++++ing resillient I know I was one! this moddle coddling scientific bullcrap creates lazy dependant kids. far out from violent video games and all sorts of uncontrolled viewing on TV what do they expect? kids raising kids... I think sometimes they do a better job of it than some parents. mostly I think you have alot of built up pent up passive anger and if you dont wow! youre amazing cause I'd e spewing! youd certainly see some bipolar symptoms when I kick thier asses and laugh in thier faces! yes those stories sicken me. show me a room full of people and Ill show you a room full of problems. thanks for what you said. I highlight... yes well my highlight is all you great poets on POSTPOEMS and good on you stay strong! i dont thinks anyone can keep you down after what youve been through!
peace healing hugs and prayers! Warmest regards SS.
Don't let any one shake your dream stars from your eyes, lest your soul Come away with them! -SS
"Well, it's love, but not as we know it."
Great things can come from terrible situations.
I love this site for I can share my experiences that I have been through anonymously. I never in my life felt better than when i do helping someone out of a deep dark hole that they have been stuck in for a while. I only had the honor to help one person out, he was way worse than I ever was, He was my roommate In rehab. we were like best friends and we only knew each other for like not even two weeks. About 3 months after I got out of rehab. (I haven't heard from him in that amount of time also) He called me from a parking structure, he was in a real bad situation. I don't need to go into much more details. I was the last person he on his list to call before He tried doing anything. I coached him on the phone to get go to somewhere safe. I made sure he was on the phone with me as he did it. I got him to hand over a full bottle of narcotics to a random security guard at the parking structure . and I stayed on the phone with him until he was picked up. No charges were pressed due to the circumstances and I SAVED HIS LIFE. I have never been in that position ever in my life. ...He was 18 years old.
After that circumstance I decided I will do my best and help others through their dark times with my experiences and what I personally been through. any means possible. Its such a rewarding feeling.
everyone has a little built up anger inside them, They are wrong if they think otherwise. Life is filled with unpredictable paths unfortunate events and many personal unsolved Issues. I guess it all depends on what those things built up inside of you became, Me, I believe all my anger went into passion for music and writing, in hopes the right people will find it and at least someone will enjoy Reading what I write only half as much as I enjoy
P.s. I plan On publishing all my work one day. (everyone says music and writing is a far' fetched goal. but nothing is too far away with endless ambition) I Just love seeing people enjoy something I have created weather it be song or words Especially when I can share some of the things I have been through to help people get though the night.
oh and p.s.s.s. Thanks for reading all of what I wrote, most people would just pass right by and not even make the effort to see if it moderately interested them. :)
G
not me i cant bare to leave anything un read if i can!
i think it a little rude if we dont apply ourselves a little! what an amazing thing you did to save a life! you probably could save a few more! have you thought about working for some reach out programs? you would be an awesome youth worker! kids need someone who understands whats going on in thier lives and about what they have done or are into. Its great that you put those feeings into music! what a wonderful goal! Im sure you will become famous in ten years. thats what i am told. dont ask. long story you could read some poems that would give you insight. but there will be a blond haired or orange haired man who will come into your circle at this time things will start to fall into place and you will put your plan into action. but beware of this person they want to get as much out of you as they can. read everything twice or send to a lawyer to make sure. sorry that just came to me out of nowhere. anyways keep writing singing and composing much respect! SS!
Don't let any one shake your dream stars from your eyes, lest your soul Come away with them! -SS
"Well, it's love, but not as we know it."
I have I have
I would love to do something along the lines as a youth leader for something, I did put in an application for peace corps. but you surprisingly need a four year degree to go over sea's to rebuild houses and I tried earlier this year to get into disaster relief. I sadly kind of been procrastinating right now because I hold a job title at McDonald's. (sigh) worst job ever. I think I might look back into something along the lines of helping people. Anything to get out of the food business. I am not sure what kind of leader I can be, I prefer to do it anonymously, I am not the most well behaved person out there. I tend to enjoy to break rules >:0 haha.
G
hey MacDONALDS is my favourite!
With out wonderful people like you I wouldnt be able to be Mc HAPPY! ;D yes the YWCA or YMCA and there are many others start with volunteering and building a portfolio of references and you will land a job soon enough! besides you will be able to help when your hits start smashing the charts in 10 or so years! till then theres plenty of inspirationg to gleam and people to really help on your down time :) Get out there we need you! HugSS SS!
Don't let any one shake your dream stars from your eyes, lest your soul Come away with them! -SS
"Well, it's love, but not as we know it."