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Alive But Not Living
My heart still beats, my arms and legs still move,
My brain still works- And technically I am alive.
But in all actuality- I have long ago died.
The person I was- The things that mattered,
My old self gone- Hopes and dreams shattered.
Every day I get sadder- My days get badder.
I don’t know what to do- I have no one to turn to.
My Life seems through- I’m calling out to you.
To any one, Please help- I can’t control myself,
I have nothing left- It’s the worse pain ever felt.
Hopelessness and despair- Realizing that I don’t care,
Wishing someone was there- It seems so unfair.
Happiness is rare- I sit and I stare,
Out into the world.
They say Life is a gift- Well I want to give mine back,
Trade it for another- But I can’t do that.
I’m stuck and I’m stranded- On a deserted island I’ve landed,
This is what I was handed- A life time of abandon-ment.
Every day when I wake up, I wish I was still asleep,
What more could I seek- Not much more can be.
Hope, is looking into the future and seeing a moment better than this,
My hope is all gone- My Life seems futureless.
Every prayer goes unanswered- Every favor undone,
I ask for help- And receive none.
I try to get up- But as I try I keep slipping,
I want to give up- I’m alive but not living.
Michael C. Lucas
I felt like this after 15 yrs of marriage before I left. Being Mrs and Mom only and losing me and my writing called a frivilous womans hobby made me angry and sad. This is an excellent piece and very emotionally evocative and brings me back in memory to those sad times. Since then Ive done many things,gone many places and met a wonderful man. My life is so much happier now then it ever was before.Never lose your self identity while trying to keep others happy!
good poem .
I know what this feels like...since it says it's new I'm assuming you wrote it recently? They say you have to lose yourself in order to find yourself...stick with it...take me word for it, you'll be living again and not just alive...I know it's an awful feeling but don't try to fight it...just let it flow...it'll pass by faster that way. It's like trying to swim against the current. It only takes longer to get where the river will eventually bring you anyway. Hang in there...