Ostracised
By jfarrell
It starts early, that’s all I really understand,
Before I started school I was ‘outside’;
Left to feel ‘not a part’;
Left to feel unwanted.
When I started school, I was already the perfect victim;
‘No-one cares, no-one’s gonna stop us’;
Everyone knew it,
And so, they didn’t stop.
Bullied from the day I started school
Until the day I left;
I hoped it would stop there;
We’re all adults, now, right?
What a fool I was back then.
Maybe.
I hurt, but wasn’t going to school and stabbing someone
Because of it.
But, three months short of my 50th birthday, maybe…
I’ve never trusted anyone enough to have friends;
I don’t know how to feel comfortable around people
And I probably never will
I don’t know how many billions people on this planet, it doesn’t matter;
I see and hear you, but you are as out of reach
As the people I see on TV screens
And… if I did reach out… and touch one of you… you’d scream
Here, outside of everyone, looking in;
I don’t feel lonely; I don’t feel rejected;
I feel hated.
My parents ostracised me back then and this where I sit today.