If ever...

There was a story of a shattered illusion 

At least The colours sprawled out on the floor 

Would resemble some vague monet

you couldnt quite put your finger on 

 

The travesty of broken comfort

of trying to attain ill fitting goals with compromised dreams

Grand delusions, something special of ornery

 

A great trick

A magnificent swindle

a half-lit passion spooled 

You had me fooled at hello 

you almost had me at goodbye  

You worked the game 

Amassed your goals on the arch of my back

And here I was,

bending over backwards to convince myself I was in love

and that it was something etherial 

 

In the end,

fuck dust all settled

the sunlight refecting off broken shards

Struck in the face with hard enlightened reality 

The one where im just another failing priority.

Where its easier and cheaper to stay,

like some sorry sympathy cunt 

Where, you get to say,

all the extra effort

the days working three jobs

was worth it

because you chose to stay

 

so i should be grateful. 

Nice. 

 

It figures why you've never really stood up for me

you were far too interested in what others thought of you

and just happy I was the place they could lay your blame.

 

You scoff at my pain 

You think I draw from an endless well of strength 

While you only draw double standards 

 

And somehow,

you still find a way to sleep at night.

 

I guess this last revelation

was the nail in the coffin I didn't want to make.

It took so long to fashion, its my greatest work of art.

The pain of passion,

the torture of the artist

Formerly known as, the love of your life

Titled: My Greatest Mistake.

 

 

 

Author's Notes/Comments: 

in 2018 i wonder do I feel the same? Probably, only I buried it. Deep.

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RoC's picture

"You think I draw from an endless well of strength"

Sounds like someone deserves a swift kick out the back door... wouldn't want the neighbors to see, after all. What kinda numb-knuckle would worry about anyone's opinion but yours? It's beyond me.


Fortunately, for us here, postpoetically, you continue to draw from an endless well of ink. Blessed are we, with the chance to read.


p.s. If some needs a swift kick in the teeth, you let me know ;)


"Music is a universal language and needs not be translated. With it, soul speaks to soul" - Songsterr

SSmoothie's picture

Ha ha the days filled with a

Ha ha the days filled with a lack of appreciation is the devils greatest achievement you never know exactly what you got until look for it or you lose it! :) depression and negativity sucks. Don’t do It! Love ya! Hugss 


Don't let any one shake your dream stars from your eyes, lest your soul Come away with them! -SS    

"Well, it's life SIMS, but not as we know it" - ¡$&am

NF_Angel's picture

That's the kinda relationship

That's the kinda relationship that's worth walking away from. 


*~I know I'm blessed, but I'm cursed to ~ NF*

SSmoothie's picture

And sometimes it’s worth

And sometimes it’s worth fighting for more because anger speaks in terms of spite than rationality:) 


Don't let any one shake your dream stars from your eyes, lest your soul Come away with them! -SS    

"Well, it's life SIMS, but not as we know it" - ¡$&am

allets's picture

If ever...

"...the nail in the coffin i didnt want to make

It took so long to fashion its my greatest work of art

The pain of passion the torture of the artist

Formerly known as the love of your life

Titled my greatest mistake."

There is so much to digest here - from emotional matrix to poetic balance of phraseology. Then the storyline - that is engaging - in SS whip the moon fashion: the word "rant" needs more connotations to accomodate the scope. It is the place you go when you write so well. :D ~allets~

.

Always good to see you 10-04-17 - slc



Onyamaichi

 

SSmoothie's picture

ThankssometimeSS I surprise

ThankssometimeSS I surprise my self x hugss 


Don't let any one shake your dream stars from your eyes, lest your soul Come away with them! -SS    

"Well, it's life SIMS, but not as we know it" - ¡$&am