PostPoems Be Artistic. Be Creative. Be Inspired!

She was only a little girl 

as her daddy screamed at yelled her

Beatings for small reasons

she didn't undertand why her Father

couldn't stand her

and she was confused because things one day that didn't matter

all the sudden, the next, got her in trouble

life so unstable

she learned to never expect a thing

with nothing to hold on to

she learned to love nothing

Well daddy wasn't around much

left in the hands of her two brothers

who were way to young to act like father

who yelled and screamed and called her names

anything that goes wrong she was to blame

and acting just like boys and girls would

they did things to her they never should

that left marks and scars on her heart

and her view on love

she learned pretty quick her body is all that is enough

She learned quick to trust no one

and threw herself at everyone

living in a haze because the pain was too much

loosing her mom and sister in the same year was a crash

everything just falling apart 

but she cried the tears and hardened her heart

she got up and moved on

putting a smile on becaushe needed to be strong

well...her brothers weren't the only ones

there was more 

her brothers we're just the open door

forced into submission

afraid into silance

fighting back the rage inside, the violance

few years down the road she's taken away

it started out as a regular day

pulled out of class

she new thiis is more than a fixable mess

but she rolled with it, shutting down the dark

but then.....then they tore her heart

she didn't get to say goodbye to her dad

and she wasn't allowed to be sad

and her brothers kindly told her that he didn't want her anymore

and she wished....that she would have done a little more

new place, new life,

she didn't know what to expect

and she for sure didn't realise the affect

this had on her reality

this little girl.....she's me

I am adopted now

with a new family that loves me somehow

with my brother who later hurt me more

and left a bigger scar

and this little girl isn't little anymore. She got older

chasing men starting with same age and then she got bolder

one isnt enough she wanted something bigger

which left the lonelyness and shame deeper

many scars later down the road

trying to control her food

trying to control her environment and her additions

but they controlled her and so brought conviction

trapped in her pain stuck inside her mind

she was running away she was almost too deep to find

but then...

then.....

God

he walked in and picked her up

just where she was all messed up

he spoke tenderly and soften her walls

and now she just watches as they fall

and i cried the tears I needed to cry

and I disposed every single lie

that is now floating stable on the truth

and I am the living proof

i've tried too many times to get ride of this life

each day brought more and more strife

and my unscess was more of a failure

living was torture

but here i am living and alive

in everyway I did survive

and I'm pressing forwards into a better future

loving God and all his people

Learning to trust

reachign for others who were lost

living life more than happy

that is the life written over me

I want to live, not just survive

I faced death but now I stand alive

he spoke into my bones and breathed into my lungs

he erased the shame, the sing, and broke the chain

I am free

I am finally me

so to anyone who is out there finding their way

this is my story

I am far from misery

And anyone trying to find a way to cope

Quit trying, it won't work

but here is my story of hope.

I've made it so can you

just let God do what he wants to do

and that is love you like a perfect Father

run and hide but don't even bother

he sees you now just like he did then

and again and again

his heart will break till you let him fix yours

run into his arms

coping doesnt cope

but i offer you my story of hope