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Draw the blanket up around my shoulders,

Lower my head, hiding blushing cheeks away,

He couldn't understand why, I guess he never will,

But I know that I will always be this way.



He loves me for who I am, for who he sees me to be,

But I wonder if he'll notice that I'm not really me.



I shy away from the camera, make excuses for the day,

Bite my lip and smile a little, in hopes that he won't ask,

Take a picture here and there, but long to tear it up,

Just looking at myself has become the hardest task.



He'd raise my chin and smile into my eyes,

I'd lower my head and want to cry, but try to hold it in,

He never understands why I get so embarrassed by his touch,

These feelings have gone deeper now, deeper than just skin.



He loves me for who I am, for who he sees me to be,

But I wonder if he'll notice that I'm not really me.



I'm pretending to be happy with what I am today,

Looking in the mirror and smiling at myself,

But inside my stomach churns just seeing my own face,

Longing just to change, to be somebody else.



He'll never understand it, why I am this way,

He can tell me that I'm beautiful and hearing fades away,

I'd like to believe it, maybe I will someday,

But for now, my self hatred is here to stay.



He loves me for who I am, for who he sees me to be,

But I wonder if he'll notice that I'm not really me.