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Stalker and Stalkee

Clark Steven Lupton

August 1, 2007



You know you don’t want to be bored it’s true

That is why he’s stalking you

Life is more interesting that’s a fact

When a guy is always at your back



Life is boring when you’re alone with bedroom fixtures

But not when he’s outside taking your pictures

And wouldn’t you think he’s a jerk

Because he secretly follows you home from work?



Being alone brings loneliness galore

But when that happens just open the front door

And you will see him just like that

Sleeping on your front porch mat



He knows all about you including your middle name

As far as obsession goes he’s a bit insane

A guy like that is very scary

Not the kind of guy you’d want to marry



So your phone rings and there is a deep breath

Now you’re worrying about your death

He asks you out to a buffet dinner

Because he’s afraid that you’re getting thinner



You yell at him and start swearing

He surprises you because he knows what you’re wearing

You say, “My boyfriend will get you and you’ll be hurting!

I’m not joking and don’t think I’m flirting



“You’re crazy and obsessed

Stop thinking about my chest!

I don’t love you and I’m not the one

Who will give you a daughter or son



“Get help and get it quick

You are crazy and you’re sick

During that first time I don’t know what you saw

But stalking is against the law



“May I suggest cyanide?

You can use it for suicide!

I don’t care if you die

And poison is something you can rely”



The stalker said he understood

He’d change his ways and be good

And until the end of his days

He would change his stalking ways



But he took his pictures of her and inserted them up his ass

And died from a build up of too much gas

So take pity on the stalker, he is in a rut

And he may just die from putting your pictures up his butt.