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Ths Is Love

by Muriel Palanca



Take it to the limit. Push until you crush your bones and don’t let anything stop you. Reach for the stars. Be fearless, unafraid. Live in the moment. No consequences. Never regret yesterday. Jump even if you see the bottom. When you crash, let it shatter you. Let your tears explode into a scream. Let the pain consume you. It is infinite for a moment and forever.

Then get back up. Rise above your weaknesses and agony. Play the field. Be open, ambitious. Light my fire and all its’ fury. Burn your bridges and swim to the other side. It’s ok to drown. Let it pull you under. Hold your breath. Don’t let anything pass you by. Never let go even if it slips through your fingers. And if it does, run after it until your legs collapse. Let the chase thrill you, drive you.

Put it all on the line. Go out on a limb and keep going forward. Don’t look back. You have nothing to lose. Give up? Give in? Never. But I’ll always give you everything. I’m giving you the best of me, all of me. So go on. Take it. Take my breath away. Kiss me. Slam me against a wall. Show me what it’s like to feel you inside me. Skin on skin. Hard and fast. No apologies. No excuses. If this is a mistake, make it. Take a chance and say it.

I’m bleeding through my honesty but I have a little faith. I’ll lie to you if you want me to, but I want you. I really do. Do I dare say how I really feel? To hesitate, I can’t erase what I so desperately want to tell you. There’s too much at stake but to me you’re always worth it.

So here it goes. I’ll bear my soul just one last time even if it burns my pride. I’m recklessly crazy and I think more with my heart than with my head, but underneath all of that, I’m terrified. I feel so small compared to you because to me you are perfect. Nothing more, nothing less.

I love you. I don’t know why, but I do. It’s so hard to say. So simple and fragile, beautiful and complicated. But I love you. I thought you should know that. If only you’d look at me and let me in. Maybe I’m everything you’re searching for. Maybe you’ll break my heart. But before you do, look into my eyes and see me. Really see me and know that no one will ever love you more than I do.

I love you in a way that kills me every time I try to move forward. A love and longing that keeps me awake and never ceases to give me peace. A love that is unrequited and unreasonable, but so strong and unbearable that it keeps me alive as I’m dying. So now I surrender because I have nothing to lose. I have nothing except time and an empty space. I love you.

Please let that be enough.