“So beautiful. She’s got the looks.”
It’s announced, as if everyone can’t see for themselves.
Reads, writes, has her head in the books.
She’ll go to college one day.
She’ll make us proud.
So very proud.
When the door closes softly behind her,
All composure is lost.
Her beautiful smile shatters
She falls...
Down...
Down...
Down...
Her lungs are like jellyfish
Yet somehow she breathes
Living her lie to near perfection
Attempting to attain something that doesn’t truly exist:
Happiness.
She places Personality on the shelf
In the back
Gathering dust behind Bra Size and Figure
She is brilliance.
And though her smile can melt the most frigid of hearts
Her mind can astound the most vivid of imaginations.
But in the end, that doesn’t matter.
If she were to show her true colors...
Would anyone understand?
She stays the chameleon, heard but not observed. Not truly seen.
Meant to blend in.
A butterfly trapped in a jar.
Frightened, confused.
Unwilling to let down her peers by imperfectness.
Unable to accept disappointment.
She gives herself pep talk in the early hours
Just to get out of bed
Just to drag her weary soul
Encased
In a energetic exterior
From class to class.
She’s frightened of the future
Neglectful of the past
Holding herself back.
She whispers she’s torn up on the inside
Can’t think - only worry.
Playing tug of war with her emotions
“I want to do something important... Get on TV..
I want to be able to go up to him..”
She says softly
Her eyes red from tears
“And say, ‘Look at me. Look how far I’ve gone -
and I did it without you.’”
And I know she will.
Whether or not she goes to college
Whether or not she has imperfections
Or keeps her head in the books
Or has the incredible looks
Or has money
Or fame
Because she’s already made the first step.
She’s made us proud.
So very proud.
And we know
She is brilliance.
© Laura Stevens 2007
Beautiful, sad, and happy at the same time. Good work. :)