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sitting here thinking

what should i do

i got the knife in my hand

ready to my cute my wrist

let it all out

let the blood run down my arm

but i dont wont to do it

its not right to do it

i love ones that it would hurt

i know where the guns are

i know where to get the shells are for it

but i dont wont to that eather

i have love ones who i would hurt in the end

but right know i feel like it would be for the best if i was not here

i was with god

but i not ready leave yet

what should i do

going to put the knife down this time

i won not the vioce in my head

they lost this time

just going to think on how i change myself

how to get help to do that one

ask god for the help

going to stop living in the past

going to open up

all this is going to take time

but i know i can go it with my family and the ones who love me

the friend i do have will help me to i hope

just going to sit here and think the reast of the night

i not ready to have him leave me

not know not ever

i love hin so much

it finly opened my eyes to how i am living and how i have to chang to make it work out

but i not going to lines to the voice in my head

the knife is on the floor still opened but on the floor where i cant get it

going to put it away for good know