That is it
all over
Elaine thinks
on the bus
after school
she and John
and the kiss
all done with
everything
on the edge
her nerves wrought
as if each
hidden thought
was exposed
to everyone
silently
she sits near
the window
looking out
tears sitting
on the rims
of her eyes
like actors
impatient
to get on
to the stage
and perform
she’d seen John
walk on by
to get on
the school bus
he is there
across the
aisle sitting
looking out
as she is
wondering
what went wrong
what he’d said
or done wrong
at lunch time
on the field
at recess
he saw her
on the bus
sitting there
looking out
not at him
pretending
not to know
he is there
Goldfinch talks
beside him
some such stuff
in his ears
empty words
soft laughter
all John wants
is Elaine
to have her
near to him
her body
close and warm
not this cold
far distance
between them
Elaine feels
all undone
all exposed
each nerve taut
every
thought of John
being near
but not near
wanting him
next to her
as it was
before lunch
the bus moves
to go home
she watches
scene changes
vibrations
moving tears
to the edge
like fragile
suicides
thinking on
the long fall
but her love
bites deeply
all undone
can’t recall.