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Suicide Is there someone that you know who you can confide in?
That you know that they will be there for you through thick and thin?Do you have person who will always care?
And no matter what they have your back and will always be there??How would you like this to be your every day life,
knowing that no one will ever want you as a wife.Would it tear up your pride, and make you turn to suicide?Would it make you feel like you do now, could you ever commit to anything knowing that there will never be someone to love you like that, no way, no how??No matter what you do, or how hard you try,there's always that thought that's in the back of my mind just wishing and praying that I would die.I think it about it daily...wondering what happens after life if I actually did this to me.I wonder if anyone would ever care,that from this day forward that I would never be there..I just don't know what to do or say anymore, there is no one there for me and I can't run to someone and ask them a question like before.
They just wouldn't understand, it doesn't feel right to be an odd ball,its like a thumb on a hand. I simply cannot confide, all I know how to do is hide..All this anger and pain building up inside...one simple answer for me and to me is suicide..
But which way will I and can I do this, I don't wanna see all this makes me think of gurl Tish.I want it to be fast and easy,making sure to please me.It will make everyone happy,and make them stop feeling so crappy..
To muh gurl: tru dat ya would be all lonely n shyt up in mer-town..ya can chase em wiff Jessica..YOUR ALL TIME FAVORITE CHICKA!! lmao..jk yo..ummz kinda hard to chase deer when yo parents don't let ya go anywhere's
To Dana: I'm glad that you can relate to my feelings, I know there is peepz out there that have the same difficulties but have way worse problems than I do but its just my feelings... I agree I won't know what life is like if I'm dead..people say you will watch down from heaven on those you love..but I don't believe in god and think that once your dead that your dead and all this other talk about another world or coming back as someone is totally BS!! But toughing it out..there is only so much a person can take before they go off!! hehe thanks for the comments tho.. I will write as my life crumbles or as people say "get better as you go on"
Good job... expresses a lot of feelings in there that I'm familiar with. I've toughed out life so far and like you said people say it gets better but how are you going to find out if your gone before it happens? I know its hard, but just try. =) Anyways, keep writing!
Heyz a gurl watch it dont be talking like that then if you werent here then who in da hell will find the HELLA FINE GUYS!! and who would i chase da DAMN deer with? Those f*ckers always run to fast for us!!! N then if you werent here who would i throw mikes bike in the woods wid??? come on get a grip.. LOL CHASE some deer u will feel hexa lot betta!! Ur muh girl.. L8er