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My Soul Feels Warmer

by Elizabeth Van Cleve (May 5, 1983)

The sun has shown like this before

but today, my soul feels warmer

My eyes are sparkling, I can tell

My face is all one smile

How today seems different

It really does surprise me

I'm so happy and without a man

I never knew I could be

Times before, I felt so lonely

and I always had a man

I'd live my life with two in mind

Yet always feared he'd leave me

When I was with him, all was grand

but nights and days alone were murder

I worried he might die or find someone else

I wanted him with me every minute

Times together seemed shorter and shorter

In fact, it was quite the opposite

I really spent no time alone at all

because I was with him on the phone

Deep down I knew I wasn't happy

I was crying all the time

I claimed our problems were due to him

He never missed me quite so much

If he really cared, he'd change for me

And so, I went on hoping

I wished I wasn't so insecure

I'd do anything to keep him

Then one day, he asked too much

I found I had a breaking point

I had let him hurt me all he wanted 

but not our unborn child

This time I'd do what I felt was right

It was my mind and body to consider

Oh, I had the abortion all right

I aborted the baby's father

Today is different now, I've realized

I don't just stick up for my baby

I also stick up for myself

which makes my life grow better every day

There are still times that I get lonely

Some say that Now, I'm really picky

I don't want just any man

I want time to be a woman

Every day I learn more about myself

And how to enjoy some simple things

Like thinking and acting on my own

without some man's help

Someday I may fall in love again

Until then, I don't take losers

Today the sun does shine on me

And so, my soul feels warmer