This Loosing Of My Mind

Folder: 
Soul Poetry

'Nothing'

comes so very simple nowadays.

For 'nothing' is all I seem to be left with,

from a brain that's fading, quickly from gray.



I stand at the crossroad,

of where a life use to dwell,

and all I barely see now,

is an weed-overgrown and empty lot.



Memories replay,

like an ancient picture show-

A silent movie of existance,

of a sub-titled span:



A child use to play there,

carefree, light-hearted,

worries not even a thought,

for playtime, then, was priority.



A young woman use to grow there,

from infant, to tot, to child,

to young lady, she became.

Blossomed and bloomed there, she did.



A wife, use to love there,

and love, given back, in turn.

The relationship out of two,

who there, became of one.



A mother use to nest there,

feeding bits of bookworm-knowledge

to her beloved offspring,

before, they off and flew away.



An old woman use to sit there,

flashing back, to times before,

hanging on to the memories that remain,

and trying to remember, her name.



'The End'

Flashes on the screen,

putting away the memoirs,

in the archvives of my mind.



Creature of habit, I'll return yet again.

When once more,

I long for the recollections,

that my gray matter takes away.



But for now, I pull the weeds,

allowing regrowth to hopefully spring forth,

and I pray silently, there on my knees,

to stop, this loosing of my mind.



©Cathy Faist 2007

Author's Notes/Comments: 

*This piece just came about this morning, 'inspired' if you will, by the my recent neuro tests, that show I am loosing gray matter functioning in the frontal lobe and left side of my brain-as a result of ME/CFS CNS/neuro involvement. I feel so blessed to have even been able to pen this one, because writing...creating is getting harder and harder to do and I do less and les sof it because of my frustrations in not remembering things or being able to find and grasp words and things I want to say.

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bendergender's picture

Well, a very good and moving poem. My only gripe is the word "use" it should be "used" but that can of course be edited.A fine strong read of a terrible affliction and i commend you on your honesty and will just say i enjoyed the poem and say well done and thanks for the read. Cheers.